Boy George

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Boy George
Biographical information


Physical description

Gay/Karma Chameleon/Hippie/Giant Robot



Hair color

None (was previously brown or something)

Eye color


Chronological and political information



Culture Club


Boy George was president of the national cheese federation of Belgium for 27 years, he also served 4 years in prison for smuggling 4 tonnes of illegal marshmallows through the borders of Slough, this also caused the "Secret" Black plague of 1993. He is also known apparently for his music, he released 2 albums of pure original "Gangsta Rap", this was banned in 2002 for it's highly offensive lyrics and "urban" instruments, consisting off a tooth brush, a bin lid and 12 bananas. These albums were titled "F*** you Nana" and "These Fish T**s Yours Nan?"...the latter yielding the McCarthy-era hit song "Commie Chameleon". Which leads to his next jail sentence, he served a life sentence in the small island, Jhoto. When released from prison Boy George was assaulted by the "GFNMS" AKA "Grannys For Nice Music Society". He later died of AIDS in a hospital in New Zealand after losing a leg to a rabid Granny of GFNMS who seemed to wield razor sharp dentures. He now dwells in the depths of Manchester, England selling rather cheap watches and singing to the birds, badly of course.

Masochism[edit | edit source]

Boy George is famed for his masochistic nature. One of the songs on his No. 1. album 'Down with White People' (in which he often did a duet with Patrick Moore) was 'Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?'

"Do you really want to hurt me

Do you really want to make me cry

Do you really want to hurt me

Do you really want to make me cry

I'd really quite like that.

It would give me sexual pleasure that I haven't experienced since that night with George Michael."

It was an amazingly successful album, and for some strange reason, it was favoured in France more than any other country in the world.

LIVE AIDS[edit | edit source]

Boy George is also a huge fan of charities. He teamed up with Bob Geldof, Gary Glitter, Bryan Adams, that prick from U2 and Queen to publicly give Cilla Black AIDS on world-wide TV. Unfortunately it was later revealed that dear old Cilla was in fact a borg and so wouldn't be affected.

Gay?[edit | edit source]

Boy George and Mr. T. I pity those fools.

George completely denies these claims, and says that he "really thought that Elton John was a woman" when he spent that night in the hotel with him.

Further evidence is George's marriage to TV presenter Esther Rantzen from 1984 until their divorce after Esther's affair with Robbie Williams in 1995.

What, you mean you didn't notice? I mean, look at him, you idiot!

He also dated the drummer of his band Culture Club. Yeah.

Plagiarism charges[edit | edit source]

Boy George representing the National Cheese Federation at the International Cheese Conference of 1876.

On 7 December 2006, Boy George was arrested for several charges, including cocaine possession, heroin possession and being an all out fag (his arrest took place in Alabama, mind you). The biggest charge however was the charge of Marilyn Manson for looking and acting the exact same way (the plagiarism thing). That charge however was settle in exchange for $5000 and a homo-erotic blowjob.

Kidnapping Charges[edit | edit source]

On December 5, 2008. Boy George was convicted in Snaresbrook Crown Court, London, of assaulting and falsely imprisoning 28-year-old Norwegian male prostitute Audun Carlsen in his home in East London. He was allegedly handcuffed to a wall and beaten with a metal chain, after the two had just finished a nude pornography session.