User:Zombiebaron/F@H

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Do you feel, funny? Well, do ya punk?
Enter The Poo Lit Surprise Writing Contest Thing.
There are prizes.
Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png

Welcome to Uncyclopedia,

the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.
40,956 articles in English

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

Today's Featured Article

Sick Orchids.jpg

Orchids are a special family of temptress flowers that bloom around June, totally unlike conservative flowers with upstanding morals and family values. They have delicate bodies, slim stems, and deep orifices, with small follicles emanating from their lower inner region that open up once every 28 days or so to emit a rather fishy yet surprisingly fragrant scent in order to attract insects, which will invade their insides to help pollinate them.

Orchids are considered to be some of the most scrumptious flowers in the plant kingdom, and they are also utterly insatiable. No amount of pollination is enough. Whereas almost all other flowers would be satisfied with one insect pollinator per day, for Orchids, no amount of frequent diverse visitors is enough. They are so good at seduction, bumble bees are known to fight one another to the death in their attempt to mount the stamens of orchids and destroy their tall slender legs in the process. Only the strongest bees with the most cunning, deceptive, and charismatic qualities are able to beat other bees during the frenzied orchid mating season. (Full article...)

Did you know...

I burning your dog real.jpg
  • ... that not all πr². There are also many π that r rounded?
  • ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside?
  • ... that originally, Hell was an acronym for "Happiness, Euphoria, and Lively Laughter?"
  • ... that Joe Biden stepped in dog shit?
  • ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
  • ... that the Japanese have a saying: "A man cannot read the same Wikipedia page twice"? The pages are constantly being edited, and the act of reading it will make you a different person. Therefore, when a man goes back to re-read it, both the text and the man have been changed.
  • ... that the concept of Hell dates back to ancient Egyptians' fear of sand burning your feet?
JemimaLisa.jpg
  • ... that there was more then one model for the Mona Lisa? (Pictured)
I burning your dog real.jpg
  • ... that not all πr². There are also many π that r rounded?
  • ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside?
  • ... that originally, Hell was an acronym for "Happiness, Euphoria, and Lively Laughter?"
  • ... that Joe Biden stepped in dog shit?
  • ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
  • ... that the Japanese have a saying: "A man cannot read the same Wikipedia page twice"? The pages are constantly being edited, and the act of reading it will make you a different person. Therefore, when a man goes back to re-read it, both the text and the man have been changed.
  • ... that the concept of Hell dates back to ancient Egyptians' fear of sand burning your feet?
JemimaLisa.jpg
  • ... that there was more then one model for the Mona Lisa? (Pictured)
I burning your dog real.jpg
  • ... that not all πr². There are also many π that r rounded?
  • ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside?
  • ... that originally, Hell was an acronym for "Happiness, Euphoria, and Lively Laughter?"
  • ... that Joe Biden stepped in dog shit?
  • ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
  • ... that the Japanese have a saying: "A man cannot read the same Wikipedia page twice"? The pages are constantly being edited, and the act of reading it will make you a different person. Therefore, when a man goes back to re-read it, both the text and the man have been changed.
  • ... that the concept of Hell dates back to ancient Egyptians' fear of sand burning your feet?

In the news

Norris4.jpg

Ongoing: Fallout from the Epstein FilesWar Special Combat Operation in Iran • Chucky McGoo's jawline being gradually destroyed • Impossibly long lines at American airports

Recent deaths: Miami Dolphins, twice • That guy from Boston, not the city, but the band, from the city • Chuck Norris doesn't die, he goes to Hell to regroup • BuffyXander HarrisRobert Mueller

Upcoming deaths: IranMahmoud AhmadinejadAtlanta Falcons • Streetsigns with Cesar Chavez's name • TSA agents' bank accounts and sanity • Sora

On this day...

For every moose you save, another moose is slaughtered and its meat given to a starving Norwegian family

March 25: International Moose Preservation Day

Today's featured picture

Adobe Potatochop CS
Adobe Potatochop is the industry standard software for chip production amongst chip shops the length and breadth of England. Available with a number of plugins, including the most recent 'extra crispy' update, it is, along with Adobe Suppersready one of Adobe's most well known pieces of software.

Image credit: Mhaille
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images

Recent Articles


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


BePrepared.png

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


Noobaward.png

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

You have less than a week, just 6 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,956 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Moccan!:
United States
Uncyclopedia
English
United States
40,956
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
50785
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
19194
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
Wikia 17766
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
Wikia 14423
Italy
France
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
Wikia 8936
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
Wikia 12400
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
6417
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
Wikia 6330
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
7300
Finland
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016.

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.