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The high-brow comedy website that only Gods can edit. 41,062 chosen articles; created by the finest writers alive.
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The Autoconspiracy 2000 (more commonly known as the Conspiracy Theory Generator) is a top-secret computer program built by the world's most elite historians and computer scientists for the purpose of expanding historical knowledge beyond that which would normally not be achievable by humans. The goal of the program is to map out and eventually solve every historical uncertainty by "Exploring the Infinite Chronoscape" as the program's metadata puts it.
Early versions of the Autoconspiracy can be traced back to prehistoric times, where archaeological records show evidence of some particularly clever cavemen who had studied the natural patterns of moss and of mud to explain the origins of organic material. More refined methods of discovering hidden truths came later, culminating with the final Autoconspiracy version, Autoconspiracy 2000 c. 2000. (Full article...)
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Did you know...
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- ... that rounding up sheep is easiest to the nearest ten?
- ... that goldfish are neither gold nor fish?
- ... about Alliteration articulating an artistic approach aimed at annotating and arranging alphabetic accouterments as alarmingly asinine alignments?
- ... that you're more likely to get struck by lightning twice than to discard an irrational fear based on a statistic like this one?
- ... that cow tipping is a term that describes the custom of giving bovines an additional sum of money in exchange for their milk, meat, or other services?
- ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior?
- ... that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
- ... that the WWF is the only "sports entertainment" organization endorsed by PETA and Greenpeace? (Pictured)
- ... that if you say peacock, no one bats an eye, but if you say poopcock, everyone blows their minds?
- ... that Deus ex machina is Latin for "cop out"?
- ... that it's probably not the weekend (The chance is 5/7)?
- ... that Godot isn't coming?
- ... that your fly is unzipped?
- ... that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped?
- ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
 - ... that rounding up sheep is easiest to the nearest ten?
- ... that goldfish are neither gold nor fish?
- ... about Alliteration articulating an artistic approach aimed at annotating and arranging alphabetic accouterments as alarmingly asinine alignments?
- ... that you're more likely to get struck by lightning twice than to discard an irrational fear based on a statistic like this one?
- ... that cow tipping is a term that describes the custom of giving bovines an additional sum of money in exchange for their milk, meat, or other services?
- ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior?
- ... that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
- ... that the WWF is the only "sports entertainment" organization endorsed by PETA and Greenpeace? (Pictured)
- ... that if you say peacock, no one bats an eye, but if you say poopcock, everyone blows their minds?
- ... that Deus ex machina is Latin for "cop out"?
- ... that it's probably not the weekend (The chance is 5/7)?
- ... that Godot isn't coming?
- ... that your fly is unzipped?
- ... that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped?
- ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
- ... that rounding up sheep is easiest to the nearest ten?
- ... that goldfish are neither gold nor fish?
- ... about Alliteration articulating an artistic approach aimed at annotating and arranging alphabetic accouterments as alarmingly asinine alignments?
- ... that you're more likely to get struck by lightning twice than to discard an irrational fear based on a statistic like this one?
- ... that cow tipping is a term that describes the custom of giving bovines an additional sum of money in exchange for their milk, meat, or other services?
- ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior?
- ... that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
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