Hyperbole

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No really, it is.

“This article is not entirely understated.”

~ Captain Obvious on this article

This will be – by far – the best and most important article you will ever read in your entire life or even in the afterlife. The use of hyperboles will forever change the way you view the world. They are the greatest figures of speech ever used by man.

Important![edit | edit source]

O.K. First off, there are seriously like a billion gazillion hyperboles. Each one of them is seriously better than the next. Hyperboles are God's way of describing things. They make what you are speaking of, sound godlike, making the speaker god-like as well. Hyperboles are a thousand times better than similies, a million times better than metaphors, a trillion times better than personification, and an infinite number of times better than onomatopoeias.

Nothing could be more useful[edit | edit source]

When you use hyperboles in your writing, it will make you seem 1,987,456,321,435,432,012,323,666,999,453,435,765,001.432455212 times smarter than you would be without using hyperboles.

It is seriously impossible to give a good example of a hyperbole because of their greatness. One who would want to hear an example would have to be the most stupid person on the planet... maybe in the universe. In fact, if one were stupid enough to demand an example of a hyperbole they couldn't even be a person, not even one who partakes in kitten huffing every second of their entire life.

See also[edit | edit source]