User talk:Farley Grey

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Welcome![edit source]

Hello, Farley Grey, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig.png) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Village Dump Forum, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply put {{adoptme}} on your Userpage to join. Again, welcome!  -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

Totally Spies[edit source]

Hey thanks for the feedback. I'm glad you like the first picture (I'm not fond of the other ones either). I'll work it a little and get back to you. In "miscellaneous" you could have talked about the math formulas, which I worked out using my girlulator.   Le Cejak <-> 20:23, 15 September 2007 (UTC)

Awesomeness! I guess I have to think of a way to lengthen the article, and then I'll re-resubmit to the general public. Maybe if I had, in each section, a "counterpoint" from the prissy girl in school?   Le Cejak <-> 20:43, 15 September 2007 (UTC)

Oooh, I've never "won" before! Anyways, take a look at the page now and see whatcha think. Gimme some feedback no matter HOW positive.   Le Cejak <-> 21:04, 15 September 2007 (UTC)

Pimp My Signature[edit source]

You almost had me fooled: I thought you made your own custom signature since I last talked to you. Yeah, I was trying to make the AAAAA seem like angry squeeling. I need to have something that doesn't get old...   Le Cejak <-> 23:47, 15 September 2007 (UTC)

Well, since I just discovered custom sigs today, I may know a thing 'er two.   Le Cejak <-> 00:19, 16 September 2007 (UTC)

...Your "proud fingers"? Well, anyway, here's what the doctor ordered:

  1. Make this page: user:Farley Grey/sig
  2. Go to MY PREFERENCES at the top of your screen thingy.
  3. At nickname, put this in there: {{Subst:Nosubst|User:Farley Grey/sig}}
  4. Click "raw signatures"
  5. Now, everytime you put the quadruple tilde, whatever is on that page appears there with the time stamp.
  6. The finer points of the signature, like making it different colors and such, can be found by looking at whoever's signature you like best and going to their signature page. 90% of people have their signature page as User:blahblah/sig.
  7. Keep me posted on your progress, because I want MY signature to be pimped out, too!

  Le Cejak <-> 00:37, 16 September 2007 (UTC)

Awesome! I love it when people copy me! :D However, I forgot to mention that there are rules, and I don't know where they are so I'll just put em down here:

  1. No bigger than 12 point! How can you tell if you're over? You can't! That <style> percentage thing doesn't mean what you think it means. 120% is NOT 12 point, I discovered.
  2. If you want pictures in your signature, which I think looks dumb, there are special rules you have to follow.
  3. That's all I can think of, for now...

  Le Cejak <-> 00:53, 16 September 2007 (UTC)

Yo, reviewer type person.[edit source]

Squirrel dance.gif

I remember you! Here, I have a task: review this thing: please? thank you: Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnNews:Uncyclopedia Names Man of the Year --  Le Cejak <-> 19:54, 10 October 2007 (UTC) (my signature has changed alot since you last saw it)

Here's a peace offering. Use it wisely. --  Le Cejak <-> 19:57, 10 October 2007 (UTC)
oooh! Thanks for the 45/50! Do you promise you were NOT just being nice? How do you think it would do on vfh? --  Le Cejak <-> 23:39, 10 October 2007 (UTC)

Yo, close friend type person.[edit source]

Hey Farley, do me another favor if you would: Take a look at Hard to read and then vote appropriately (wink wink) on Uncyclopedia:VFH/Hard to read to award it as a featured article... --  Le Cejak <-> 04:55, 12 October 2007 (UTC)

Welcome to UnNews[edit source]

Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."

Welcome to UnNews, Farley Grey, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC) Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 22:32, 12 October 2007 (UTC)

Thanks[edit source]

Right Arrow.png
Thank you, good sir, for realizing the importance of right arrow!

You have been singled by Doovad, yes indeed, DOOVAD, as deserving of thanks!

May your arrows always point in the "right" direction (punny!) and may you carry these lessons with you forever!

Thanks for the vote.

Thanks for voting for right arrow! You deserve this crappy template! -- Sir FS Doovad Read You got somethin to say? 02:35, 20 October 2007 (UTC)


I'll vote for your article if you vote for mine! Woot! --  Le Cejak <-> 03:49, 20 October 2007 (UTC)


Thank you for the vote! I voted for yours... However, it's a shame. You need to understand how VFH works, because you made it so that your article and mine are competing against each other. Allow me to demonstrate:

VFH Summary
whoever's thingy 3 (+6/-3) 4 days nobody cares
Farley's thingy 1 (+2/-1) 4 days maybe 75% You're competing against whoever and me.
Cajek's thingy 4 (+4/-0) 4 days more than 100% I'm competing against you and Mordillo.
Mordillo's thingy 1 (+2/-1) 4 days I don't know

Now, here's the trick: I don't understand how health works however I do know that the article with the highest health each day gets VFH. Each article with health above 0% gets a free ride until the 4th day, at which time the competition starts. Articles below 50% after that point get automatically deleted. I know that it has to do with how many people voted which way in the above and below nominations AND it's age relative to either the newest nomination or the noms above and below-- I don't know which. I wish I knew, but I don't.

The point is that in the future, wait for an article that isn't so bad that it'll be denommed by the 4th day but not so good that it lasts for a week with 200 yes votes. Also, look at the writers you're competing against in the thing. There's a lot of theories bouncing around in my head concerning this. What do you think the "health" thing is Far, because it's kinda confusing.

As Skull corrected me below, it isn't <50% that gets deleted, it's whatever the lowest health is. If that lowest health is >50% then it gets quasi-featured I believe. --  Le Cejak <-> 15:01, 20 October 2007 (UTC)

One teeny correction — it's the article with the highest score that gets featured each day, and the lowest health that gets removed first. Okay, done butting into other people's business now...  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  critchat) 15:04 Oct 20, 2007
highest SCORE or highest HEALTH? --  Le Cejak <-> 15:06, 20 October 2007 (UTC)
Highest score. And then in case of a tie, the one that's been on VFH the longest.  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  critchat) 15:09 Oct 20, 2007
Thank you Skull for butting in! please feel free to add anything else to this user's talk page! --  Le Cejak <-> 15:12, 20 October 2007 (UTC)
I looked at Forum:Suggestion to Replace the Darwin Rule again and I'm pretty sure that articles are no longer in competition with the one directly above them or below them. Instead, it's roughly based off of how long they've been on VFH versus the score they presently have. You can look at the forum for the equation, I think it's something like health = score / (days since nomination + 7), and noms under three days old have immunity unless they hit a score of -3.  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  critchat) 00:12 Oct 21, 2007

Hey, thanks for voting for Cancer[edit source]

Fuckyeah2.gif Aaawww...
Farley Grey has been diagnosed with cancer.
liver cancer. Yeah. Incurable.

Have a weird little user template! --  Le Cejak <-> 22:29, 9 November 2007 (UTC)

The return of Farley Grey?[edit source]

Where. Have. You. Been?   Le Cejak <-> (Dec 22 / 13:59)

Oh! Mr. Commander Farley, take a look at Uncyclopedia:VFH/Why?:Give Up. That's my attempt at whoring. I think you'll enjoy it though, it tells the story of a little bald kid who wanders the earth in search of a little red headed girl.   Le Cejak <-> (Dec 23 / 23:21)

Woot! I'm very glad you liked it, sir!   Le Cejak <-> (Dec 23 / 23:34)

Sorry I'm late[edit source]

Enjoy your late thankin'.

SnowySnow.JPG The Led Balloon thanks you for helping him to spread awareness of the plight of Ogle.
Beware the white stuff!

- P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon.gif(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 04:13, Jan 14