User:Simsilikesims/hows it goin

TL;DR

2019

Monday: sleep, get ready for work, work, play Facebook games for an hour or two or visit Uncyclopedia and revert vandalism/poor edits or feature an article from VFH.

Tuesday: sleep, get ready for work, work, play Facebook games for an hour or two or visit Uncyclopedia and revert vandalism/poor edits.

Wednesday: Sleep, get ready for work, work. Read Facebook viral news about the latest stupid thing the president or the Congress did. Escape into the pretend world of The Sims where politicians don't do such stupid things and universal healthcare is a thing. When I get tired of hearing Simlish, escape into the virtual world of Avakin Life where some people are jerks as usual, but I own more than 5 virtual apartments that would cost more than a million if they were real-life real estate. Too bad they only have 5 or less pieces of furniture in each of them, including things like toilets, sinks, refrigerators, and stoves.

Thursday: sleep, get ready for work, work, play Facebook games for an hour or two.

Friday: sleep, eat, shower, get dressed, go grocery shopping. Visit two to five different grocery stores to find everything on the list. Meet at least 2 rude shoppers in the process. Watch monster movie on DVD/Blu-Ray with hubby.

Saturday: sleep, eat, shower, get dressed, finish grocery shopping or other errands like taking cats to vet. Meet 3 more rude shoppers at the grocery store, usually in the produce department. Dodge cars with hurried drivers in the parking lot. Attempt to watch Netflix or On Demand with hubby while praying that our no longer net-neutral internet provider doesn't throttle our connection.

Sunday: Sleep in, sort through the pile of papers on my desk, pay bills, finish any grocery shopping that wasn't done yet, shred papers, play Titan Quest, Path of Exile, or a Sims game or catch up on mobile games I haven't played all week. Watch a pre-recorded webinar my boss wants me to watch on my own time. Curse at the Blu-Ray player for disconnecting from the internet while we are watching a Blu-Ray disk movie and being forced to correct the network settings before we can finish watching the Blu-Ray movie (maybe we shouldn't have bought an LG brand). Curse at the weather for making it unfeasible to get a satellite dish. Return to playing a game from DVD disk on PC that is fully playable offline or vent my frustration built up over the week on some random stranger by trolling fundamentalist YouTube videos (fundies are notoriously trollable: Simply point out their hypocrisies with a blunt instrument that involves neither curse words nor reportable slurs or use the words of their own holy book to prove the opposite of their viewpoint true). Laugh as the entire comments section gets deleted a few hours or days later (after you are long gone, and untouchable by the reporting system) and comments disabled.

2020

First quarter

• January: Work 9 hours a day 5 days a week. Watch sucky monotone voiced training webinar videos required by my workplace, that I am expected to do on my own time instead of on the clock. Pelosi concludes Trump has crossed the line legally and impeachment proceedings begin in the Democrat-controlled House. Oddly, the final impeachment documents make no mention of extortion. The Republican-controlled Senate dismisses the case after only 2 days.

• February: Finish forms for straggling customers who missed the deadline for employment and contractor related forms who don't use us to assist in their payroll. Listen to lengthy training webinars drone on about information I already have memorized in the background as I work. Work 8-9 hours a day 5 days a week, come home at 9pm. Stay awake until 1 or 2 in the morning because I am anxious about meeting my work deadlines. Pass the time until I can fall asleep with mobile games or Steam games, because my modded Sims games take too long to load up. At the end of the month, we mourn the loss of our cat Bryce from FIV-related lymphoma. My husband rages at the person who let him outside a few years back against his wishes. Naturally, he got used to that, but then got in a fight where he got the FIV. Our other cat Loki always runs from danger rather than confront it, so continues to test negative for FIV despite also being an indoor/outdoor cat.

• March: Learn about the COVID-19 contagion in China. Stay awake until 11 pm, wondering how long before it hits the USA.
  • A week later: First case diagnosed in the USA in an old folks home less than 50 miles from my home. Stay awake until midnight wondering how long before it spreads south to my area. Schools ordered closed in the county north of mine. Trump says this will all blow over, but given his past record based on fact-checkers, I don't believe him. Right wing fanboys continue to insist that fact checkers are part of a Fake News conspiracy, as the Affordable Care Act was a conspiracy to create "death panels".

• • Another week later: It has spread to the nearest large city, about 20 miles from my home. Schools ordered closed in my county, social distancing and OCD hand-washing advised by the Center for Disease Control, requests for civilians NOT to use masks so that health workers can use them. Read information about COVID-19 and how it will relate to businesses and payroll on the job. Stay awake until 1am alternating between reading news releases and avoiding them. Trump insists that COVID-19 is no worse than the flu or the common cold, and compares annual flu numbers to monthly COVID-19 numbers.

• • Last week of March: All schools statewide, including both public and private schools, are ordered closed. Bars and nightclubs and casinos are ordered closed except on tribal land. Restaurants are ordered to close their dining areas, but permitted to serve take-out and/or delivery orders. When the stock market crashes, Trump starts to take the pandemic seriously. Coincidence much? He appoints Pence as head of the task force, but puts down the advice of actual doctors because he resents them stealing his spotlight.

Second quarter

April:

A national emergency state of disaster is declared.

Stores quickly run out of toilet paper, then hand sanitizer, then tissue paper and paper towels when people try to substitute those for the TP they could not buy.

The end of tax season is extended until mid-July instead of mid-April. Most of our employees used all of their remaining state-required paid sick leave, much to my boss' displeasure. Attempting to work at home since let's face it, I run payroll for more than one client, and it is an essential duty. Meanwhile, my husband is at home too since they closed his building as part of the state emergency declarations. While furloughed, he is cranky since he listens to politics on YouTube which makes him even angrier about the situation caused by coronavirus, plus he doesn't get paid until they call him back to work. Although I agree with most of his opinions, by the end of the month I am just tired of hearing about it and would rather go hide in a cave. However, caves are dark, damp and uncomfortable, and have no internet connection. So I buy myself a pair of noise cancelling headphones. Then I get chewed out about my "impulsive purchase". Fortunately, I was right about the wireless Bluetooth headphones being rechargeable via USB. Meanwhile, one of my highest-paying clients decides he doesn't want to be a customer of our company anymore. My boss blames me for his choosing to go elsewhere, completely overlooking the basic concept that he might be paying less elsewhere at a location more convenient to his business. I get chewed out....again. Meanwhile, unemployment rates are skyrocketing.

May:

We brought home a new 8 week old kitten from a family friend's cat's litter. Our older cat Loki doesn't want to play and goes outside to avoid being jumped around on by Trixie, who also seems to enjoy chasing him.

Since there was simply less work I could do from home, I went back to the office one day a week, and worked from home the other 4 days. Meanwhile, my husband had started working from home since his equipment finally was set up and the required network settings set up. Since he essentially works at a call center, with a microphone, that meant I had no access to the room with a desktop during his work hours. At least he let me borrow his laptop, but did not like some of the software I installed on it for work purposes. At the office, I research information related to payroll. Everybody and all my clients want to know about all the business aid and tax consequences and employee pay requirement around this pandemic. At the same time, I had to help my boss with the calculations for the annual bonuses, and then input them into the final employee paychecks for our seasonal employees. On the one day I was at the office as an employee of an essential profession, I caught up on filing, and inputting paper information that had been left at my desk or was locked in secure file cabinets. In the stores, there are deep discounts on Easter party supplies, and grocery stores are hiring.

June:

My niece graduates in the class of 2020, with no commencement, just a very small birthday and graduation party of 10 people or less at a time, one group scheduled for the birthday party, the other group for the graduation party. Remembering my commencement experiences, I felt bad for her. (At my high school commencement, one guy actually grabbed his friend and carried him down the stairs. It was hilarious.) At least she was able to get a graduation gown and graduation pictures.

The bookkeeping, tax and payroll requirements for pandemic related changes, change once again. Twice. Or was it 3 more times? I find myself constantly checking for business news, along with critical sites like the Small Business Administration and the Internal Revenue Service. Meanwhile, tax clients who stayed away in April and May are starting to trickle back in. I am back in the office 2 or 3 days a week instead of just 1. As usual, just as I am about to take a 15 minute rest break, more paperwork gets put on my desk when I am in the office, some of which requires immediate action. Unfortunately, the local restaurants are closed for business, and the general store across the parking lot closed in January.

However, there is a bright side: other customers in the grocery store on the weekends stop complaining that I take up so much space, once the 6 foot rule is in place, and there is much less traffic on the freeways (especially less idiots who tailgate or cut in front of you). This also virtually eliminates the massive traffic jams for the time being that are typical during rush hour (which gets longer every year) near where I live. More stringent restrictions on how many people can be allowed into a store at one time also mean shorter cash register lines (but longer lines outside the store). Not only that, but (the first round of) stimulus checks is issued, along with Paycheck Protection SBA loan relief for small businesses. (Naturally, the large corporations get a huge slush fund to dip into at their whim instead.)

Trixie starts not just chasing everything that moves, but biting my feet when I get into bed. This does not help my sleep much.

Third quarter

July

The Fourth of July comes. It was the first Independence Day I have not watched fireworks with my parents on, which was hard on everybody. Finally, the month comes that they extended the tax season to. Not only did everyone who usually comes in at the last minute come in this month, but the usual quarterly reports are due. All 4 of them for employers who have hired anyone other than the owner. Plus, the quarterly excise tax returns, and some business license renewals are due. I start coming into the office every weekday. Towards the end of July I find myself seriously regretting that when I get yelled at about once every week for something that was not my fault. I seriously consider quitting, and put my resume online. One job interview results, but I did not get the job. Flashbacks follow from when I was rejected from interview after interview for months and months more than 10 years ago just before I started this job. I start taking melatonin, and resign myself to my fate. Trixie catches her first mouse, and deposits it in my shoe.

August

Happy birthday to me. I am 50 years old. Yay, I am over the hill now, officially, and more than half my life is probably over unless I live to 100. So thrilled. Too bad there is no cake since I am on a diet. At least I have my 5th anniversary to celebrate with my husband, but nobody else to celebrate with us. Meanwhile, the crap at work continues, and my husband complains at home that I cannot hear him with the headphones on. I resume singing to music without headphones while he is listening to his political videos on YouTube. Soon he quits complaining about the headphones and lets me listen to my music in peace as long as he does not have to hear it. (I like dance music and old-school hip hop, he hates dance music, and hates hip-hop even worse.) Fortunately we do both like classic rock though.

Online instructions for crafting your own mask go viral. Two weeks later, the CDC changes their recommendations from "save masks for medical personnel" to "everyone needs to wear a mask, NOW".

September

The stores are now overstocked with hand sanitizer, and almost all of them now carry masks as a basic staple item. Wildfires in rural areas about 30 miles south of us create massive air pollution. Fortunately it was not hard to get a few N-95 masks online with express delivery to filter out all the thick smoke in the air, but that did not help much with stinging eyes. To absolutely nobody's surprise, the summer party supplies are all on sale in greater numbers than in any previous year. Other areas of the country are ravaged by the typical tornados and hurricanes that seem to come annually, but have been getting stronger lately. "Wake me up when September Ends" gets a lot of airplay.

Fourth Quarter

October:

Nobody goes trick or treating since everybody is already wearing a mask and/or a full body costume (ie a Hazmat suit, also known as PPE). Trick or treaters who do arrive are tossed bottles of hand sanitizer instead of candy. Corn mazes become the most popular Halloween activity since haunted houses are no longer the scariest thing around. Horror movies become a popular escape from reality during the entire month rather than just a week or a couple days (see also the "it could be worse" scenario). Horror critics arise, pointing out the numerous plot holes.

November:

People start complaining that since Halloween is over, they shouldn't have to wear masks anymore. Conspiracy theorists start wearing tin foil hats instead of masks. Some people wear their mask incorrectly, either by accident or on purpose. Some wear them on one ear, some wear them over their beard or over their mouth but not their nose, some wear them on their forehead like sunglasses, and a few wear them as blindfolds. The election proceeds, with some states submitting ballots by mail. Trump finds himself in a stalemate with Biden at the 12 midnight mark. When results come in, and enough states that contain enough electoral votes have chosen Biden, Trump refuses to concede, and insists that only the votes that were counted before the midnight mark should matter, and the other votes that were cast by the deadline but not counted by the deadline should not matter. Various lawyers and legal teams try to reverse the votes that were cast on time but not counted on time. Each of these legal cases were dismissed due to the lack of concrete evidence, including one that was heard by the Supreme Court.

Thanksgiving comes, as does Black Friday. It broke my heart, but we were not able to see our family in person for the first time. As expected, Black Friday was a bust, but Cyber Monday almost made up for it.

December:

About two weeks after Thanksgiving, the incidence in COVID 19 cases rose again. Lockdown restrictions that had been eased for a month or so due to slowdowns in the number of cases were put back in place. Bars and gyms that had been opened with reduced hours and limited capacity were closed again. Having failed in the courts, Trump supporters tried to take their case to the media. News outlets that practiced the old fashioned concept of journalistic integrity requiring credible verification before publishing stories, turned their arguments down flat. So instead they took it to the echo chamber of social media. But this time, having been burned before by election interference in the 2016 elections from foreign governments, the social media outlets toned down the arguments to a level they considered civil, and censored arguments that they considered likely to result in violence or interference with legal government operations. Since they are private companies, they had and exercised their right to control their platforms. Trump was warned about his rhetoric on Facebook and Twitter, since they do not have a hierarchy of users on their media. Trump dismissed these warnings as "negativity" or a "Witch hunt" and continued to promote his "Stop the Steal" extension of his presidential campaign. In response, Twitter permanently disabled his account, and Facebook suspended it.

Hanukkah and Christmas come and go. My husband lights the traditional candles, and virtually visits his family on the East Coast. Unfortunately, once again, we could not visit family who live here on the West Coast only about an hour's drive away. Not only do I miss seeing everyone outside our household I love, and the gift exchange, but I also miss our family recipe, cream of asparagus soup. Unlike that canned sh** they make on cruise ships, we use fresh asparagus, or asparagus we got fresh in season direct from the growers then immediately froze. Plus we use fresh asparagus tips. Some years, we even eat lutefisk (I actually enjoy it when eaten with cream sauce and butter sauce by dim candlelight). We have an angel chime candle holder that always comes out for Christmas. My parents inherited it from my grandmother. We also have pickled herring on crackers. Everyone else has rye crackers, I have to settle for gluten-free crackers.

2021

First quarter

January

• The pandemic is still in full swing. People around the country are refusing to wear masks, complaining it restricts their "freedom". Once again, just by "sheer coincidence", the case numbers and related fatalities from COVID-19 go up 2 weeks after Christmas. The governor of our state tightens up the emergency restrictions back to their November level: Take-out only or outdoor dining only from restaurants, retail limited to 25% capacity, bars closed, and sports entertainment attendance is restricted to sports journalists with TV cameras only. Nightclubs and indoor entertainment-only venues such as theatres, remain closed, as they have since March 2020. Congress passes an act that releases a second stimulus payment, closed venue grants, and a second round of SBA loans.

• Angry that he lost, Trump keeps pounding on his "Stop the Steal" soapbox. At a particularly intense and heated rally, Trump points to Congress as the source of the problem, and encourages his supporters to march over to the Capitol, even marching in place, and pointing directly at the Capitol building. Not only do his supporters march to the Capitol steps, but his "Stop the Steal" rhetoric has got them so angry that they break Capitol windows, enter the building, and completely overrun the Capitol police. Congress representatives and senators, and journalists are evacuated to a secret location somewhere under and/or around the Capitol. The danger to them was not overestimated: gallows were set up outside the Capitol, effigies were burned, feces were smeared inside the building, statues and walls were vandalized and damaged, and selfies were taken. This also shows the level of intelligence of these "Trump or none" supporters: Apparently it did not click that destroying federal property is a FELONY, and overthrowing the government, including making credible threats to ANY branch of government, is also a FELONY, but an even more serious one. In other words, they conveniently provided some handy proof to those investigating the insurrection. Immediately after the insurrection, Trump describes these people who invaded the Capitol and threatened Congress as "very special people". A day later, after it is clear his own *** is on the line, he does a 180 and begs his supporters not to be violent.

• Impeachment take 2: The insurrection and the related incitement lead to a second impeachment. Once again, the Republican-controlled Senate refuses to indict Trump. Their excuse this time is that Trump has so few days left in office that it would be pointless to indict a former president (even to keep him from ever running for political office again).

• Vaccine trials are completed for 2 out of 3 vaccines against COVID-19 and its mutated variants. However, the supply is limited. The rich and influential, and high-risk healthcare workers are the first to get vaccinated, in that order.

• Biden takes office. Suddenly, every Republican in Congress is concerned about their rich supporters' taxes being raised by government spending. They also try to accuse Biden of being controlled by China, with the excuse that his ADULT son, who had no involvement in Biden's campaign, does business with China. (As does everyone else who buys goods from the country who is the largest manufacturer of goods in the world, and the biggest importer of US farm products and steel.) The far-right looks for evidence of Biden ties to China, but finds only about as much evidence as there was for "rigged elections". The courts threw out the later, and journalists that still understood the meaning of "journalistic integrity" refused to run biased stories on the former without any shred of evidence. YouTubers and tabloids, of course, have no restrictions on writing or showing fiction. I still miss reading about "The Bat Boy", and alien abductions in the supermarket lines. At least the staffers from the former administration did not remove the B keys from all the keyboards, unlike a certain other president's former staffers.

February

• Surprise, surprise, former Trump administration officials find themselves collecting unemployment. Too bad they had already put so many restrictions on unemployment themselves. Most companies find that these former staffers do not "fit in with their company culture", or are just "not a good fit for the position". I suspect if they applied for mundane service jobs, such as fast food, janitorial work, or grocery store clerk positions, or even seasonal agricultural workers, they might get hired. Too bad they consider these positions "beneath them", which was the whole problem with the prior administration. Oh well, I suppose they could always try to monetize videos on YouTube, write books, start their own businesses or sell multi-level marketed products (hello Amway) using their many contacts, or just plain retire. After all, they have Social Security, and probably a ton of investments to retire on, right? Plus they have some nice big mansions, yachts, planes, and/or luxury cars to sell if things get too tight, so it isn't like they will become homeless. I'm sure they could buy a nice 2-story home or condo with the proceeds of the sales, and maybe a nice used car or two.

March

A third round of stimulus payments is passed, once again over the objections of Republican Senators who neither wanted Biden to get any credit for helping the country, nor did they see any profit in it for themselves personally. At least Bush Sr, despite his promise not to raise taxes during his administration, understood when it was actually necessary. Heck, even Bush Jr is both more competent and ethical than these guys. I thought he was the worst president in my lifetime (I think Nixon resigned just before I was born) but Trump actually trumped him.

Meanwhile, as part of the package, the tax deadline was extended to May, and some unemployment was now excludable from taxable income. Hm...sympathy for ex staffers, or another attempt to appease angry voters?

Meanwhile at work, I was given an opportunity to jump the vaccine line. After consulting with my husband so we could possibly get shots together, he told me he could lose his government job if we accepted the offer. Further research told me our state is on the honor system so technically it would not be illegal just dishonorable. We decided to wait until our phase was officially announced.

Second quarter

April

My husbands workplace makes an announcement that vaccine line jumping is an automatic termination offense. A few days later, we get a notice from our state’s Department of Health that we are now eligible. So we try to make our appointments. Turns out in most cases, the bots got there first. Then we found a provider that had its appointments completely behind a password protected system. We were able to make an appointment for only one week out. Unfortunately this put my first appointment on the Thursday just before the traditional tax deadline, but given they extended the deadline, my boss can go screw herself if she doesn’t like it. Fortunately our state has a paid sick leave law that applies to all employers regardless of size and a no retaliation law for using it. That is after the paid required short ten to fifteen minute rest breaks she tries to discourage preparers from taking. Not to mention I have at least two job duties including our company payroll that literally nobody else in the company knows how to do. Yeah, so if she fires me, she is screwed anyway. Our general manager, network manager and handyman actually quit after she verbally abused him.

May

US tax day finally comes along, a month later. However, the Infernal Revenue Service is STILL a year behind in processing returns, despite the extra time to file. Good luck if you filed a paper return, and heaven help you if you need extra processing on that paper return. Insider Protip: Do NOT send stone or wooden returns COD. They might make great statues, and give you a sense of satisfaction, but they WILL be returned. The jury is still out on 3D printed plastic returns.

After tax day, I finally get around to updating uncyclopedia.org. It still sucks. Needs better pictures. Added a blog so those who still "subscribe" have SOMETHING to read. Plus it lets me update visitors on developments on both sites, including featured articles, news, notices when I do update the site.

Meanwhile, all our business clients are asking about Small Business Administration assistance programs.

I said my final goodbyes to my Dad two months after his 85th birthday. Unfortunately, that did not stop my boss from yelling at me for "not managing my workload" two weeks later, then trying to tell me that issues that "I" had, could not be fixed by setting specific and measurable goals. I begin to look at available job positions.

At home, on weekends, my husband and I watched TV shows on the CW. We watched the final episode of Black Lightning as Black Lightning got his final vengeance on the villain who killed his father when he was a child hiding in the closet.

June

Coronavirus vaccine becomes available in Washington state for those at risk: First those who are Senior citizens and medical staff (including doctors, nurses and dentists), next those in essential businesses who are unable to work from home, or those over 50 years of age with at least 2 high-risk factors. Lines form for mass vaccinations in the otherwise unused sports stadiums and large entertainment venues. Some are even caught jumping the lines before their turn or their vaccination rollout phase. Vaccination scarcity is an issue.

Having a chance to catch my breath, I finally updated uncyclopedia.org a bit more, trying to add links to non-English Uncyclopedia sister sites. Later in the month, I figured out how to add a third party web page to the site without it being caught in a GoDaddy frame.

Third quarter

July

The opportunity to get vaccinated for everyone 18 and older is opened, followed by vaccination approval for those 16 and older. Near the end of the month, Washington (state) officially reopens, allowing businesses to operate at full capacity.

Meanwhile, quarterly payroll taxes and excise taxes are due, causing an influx of clients to tax offices that remain open during the summer. A few clients trickle in who treated the 2020 taxes as if they would have the same due date as the 2019 individual income tax due date. The rest are asking about money they are expecting from the federal government, whether it be a tax refund or a stimulus check. Fortunately, the federal government continued to function after January 6th, and most of them will still get their money, and have options to troubleshoot delays.

August

The vaccine is approved for emergency use for those 12 and older. Temporary FDA emergency approval becomes permanent FDA approval for the Pfizer vaccine. Parents start whining about how their children should not be vaccinated for coronavirus when they get their measles, mumps, polio, chicken pox, diphtheria, and whooping cough shots. Or if they got those but have not got the coronavirus shot because it was not yet available, how they are so special or have access to "secret information" (there ARE no "secrets" on the internet unless you are on the dark web or on a password-protected deep web site) that they know the coronavirus shot is different from the other shots. College students complain about getting the coronavirus shot along with the meningitis shot. Travellers start whining about how they should not get the coronavirus vaccine along with the yellow fever vaccine when travelling outside the US.

Sports stadium-goers and theatre-goers complain about how they should not be locked out of the same building, if they don't vaccinate, that was actually closed to the public when there was no vaccine.

The less-than-intelligent that still don't believe the results of the vote read the websites that told them who won the vote, and from those same websites found a great medical cure for coronavirus: Horse dewormer. Because those same websites also told them Fauci cannot be trusted because he actually...keeps updated on information by and for the Centers for Disease Control, and holds a current medical degree, and dared to contradict Donald Trump?

Those who did not die from using Horse de-wormer, but refused to either wear facial masks or get vaccinated carried a form of coronavirus across country, perhaps on a Delta Airlines flight of unknown origin, perhaps originating in Florida or Mississippi with two stops in Texas and Georgia, and a final destination in Idaho to sell potatoes.

The month of August began with vaccinated individuals no longer requiring masks to enter and use indoor public spaces. The end of August saw the return of vaccinated individuals needing masks to enter and use indoor public spaces. Travelling between counties with a 66% vaccination rate and a 34% vaccination rate, it turns out, is just a short drive.

September

New bookkeeping and payroll systems for our clients are discussed in the office. Training requirements are put in place by the corporate headquarters, along with specifications for which software for client bookkeeping and payroll can or cannot be used. Having an accounting degree (as of about 35 years ago) and 8 years experience hands-on in payroll and 3 years of client bookkeeping experience, I passed the final test and did not have to listen to all the boring web training that everyone else did to qualify to use the new software, because I already knew 95% of it. I took a well-deserved unpaid vacation for two weeks. I finished up four non-profit tax returns (form 990) in the other two weeks. It is recommended for non-profits to either have very experienced bookkeepers or CPAs doing their books if they receive more in donations than about $15k US. And, as I found out a few days after I completed one of them, that there is a cost to reinstate a nonprofit if it does not file a return in 3 years: ranging between $250 to $600 USD. Ouch. Meanwhile, my boss paid for an EA review course for me. When I asked her WHEN I would be able to study this with my busy schedule, the answer was, "you can just study it in the office".

Fourth quarter

October

Discussion on procedures for moving our own bookkeeping and our client's bookkeeping and payroll to the new systems continue. Word is out in the office that a coworker (the very first one I trained on the old system) is moving out and starting her own business. Meanwhile, I file 2 more nonprofit returns, help a few customers finish off their filings on their extensions, and file several city business and occupation/sales tax returns. Quarterly payroll tax forms are due again, all 4 of them for each customer in our state (including two state insurance programs withheld from employee pay and also by the employers). News received about another additional payroll form that will be filed in 2022 to another state insurance program. In our state, worker's compensation is required, and is offered through the state as a tax, unless the business shows proof of self-insurance. Paid family and medical leave insurance covers workers who give their employer 30 days notice, and will be out more than about 2 or 3 weeks. People still get paid family and medical leave confused with paid sick leave. Our state requires paid sick leave since 2019 because....maybe we don't want waitresses and cooks with colds or flu handling our food, or parents worrying about leaving their sick kids at home, and/or possibly having to choose between their kid's health and their job? Not to even mention the new COVID-19 stuff since last year. The boss decides to hold a new tax class to replace some preparers who are likely not returning next year. In the meantime, every time she comes by my desk she has something new and critical to say about this and that, especially the fact that I was the only one who was working overtime who didn't have a "reason" for it that she liked. Apparently bookkeeping, our payroll and client payroll are less important to get done than taxes and licensing, and the other person who did most of the client bookkeeping is on salary, making just enough to keep her nonexempt. I got the impression she was also assuming I might be goofing off when I am taking my rest break at my computer. Not like she actually cares if anyone GETS a rest break. Never mind that the "break room" is only as big (literally) as a closet or a single cubicle, and literally has a closet door on it. I browse job listings again, and apply for a nonprofit. Maybe I filled out the application wrong, but I never even received any acknowledgment that it was received. Another one required a resume to be uploaded. I begin polishing off and updating my resume (at home of course). The likelihood that I might not be a preparer working next year increased. Apparently it did not sink in during my two week vacation that there might be consequences if I left.

November

Office contest on who can get the most Yelp and Google 5-star reviews. Yes, I got enough to win the basic prize for those who qualify, but not the grand prize for highest numbers. Three more nonprofit returns completed. I begin studying the EA coursework in the office as suggested, and since I don't have the stamina to train from 9 or 10am for two or three hours then work until 8pm or 9pm, I put in the time to study it on work hours. My boss starts calling me at home when I am NOT working nor scheduled to work. Details of which clients bookkeeping and payroll services will move to the new business in the other office, and which will stay with our office are discussed. No contracts have been signed yet. I find myself filled with dread every time the boss comes over to adjust the thermostat, wondering, what is it THIS time? Other than the course, I have literally not heard a thank you from her in almost a year.

December 2021 - Moving On

I applied for another new position at the beginning of the month, when the boss decided to scream at the whole office for a mistake on a client's payroll that was easily correctable, and for all the other mistakes in the prior two months, and actually told us "how do you sleep" because our work was so shoddy. About 2 or 3 days later, I got an interview offer. One day after the interview, I get a phone call that they are offering me the position. The day after that, I received the offer in writing as an attachment via email. I put in my two week notice, just as the final discussions of the client lists for the current business and new business are being finalized. My coworker gets more of the clients for her new business since I will not be there to handle the extra bookkeeping. She already screamed as much as she could about that client, so she could not do any worse than that, and besides, I am beyond the point of caring now. I have already quit, so threatening to fire me is an empty threat.

I am very excited about this position since it seems far more in line with my personal values and needs. However, I am required to pass certain physical tests (including a drug test, TB test and a basic eye chart vision check), and pass a background check. I was afraid they would require certain physical athletic exercises as part of the physical tests, but fortunately they did not. They also did some other immunity tests. I passed my physical portion of the tests with flying colors. I also got my flu shot, and to get it over with, my shingles shot. However, I am still about 10 years away from needing a pneumonia shot - which I was interested in since I had been visiting my niece and my sister's family and my niece had pneumonia. In the immunity testing, it turned out I needed some booster shots, which I got in the following week. During the following week, my background check results were clean (to nobody's surprise).

I spent the week that the background check was taking place, and the week after that, training my replacements. Yup, two part time people to replace one full time person. Meanwhile, I got several projects put on my desk within the space of 15 minutes while I was training one of my replacements. The next day, around mid-month, she went on vacation earlier than planned, scheduled to return next year. The boss of course, had already scheduled her vacation. I agreed to come in for a couple hours a week until the end of 2021 to complete the training and make sure my coworkers get paid. My training on my new job starts the last week of December.

Last week of December: Started work the 28th. Got set up on my first day with the timeclock, phone access, and company email access, and reviewed some training materials. Then came the snowstorm - the one that hits about once a decade around here with more than one foot of snow. We don't have many snow trucks around here. So we all left early on the 29th - and on the 30th I called in because my car is not an all-wheel drive, and there were several unsanded hills I would have had to navigate - including one that I almost did not make it up on the 29th. Office was closed for New Year's Eve.

2022

First quarter 2022

January

First week of January: By Monday, most of the snow finally melted. Finally got access to my timecard, and a sign-in to office software. Spent most of the week preparing for end of year processing and reports: There was a full month and a half of work from when my predecessor had left. However, I still did not have access to do most of what was needed in order to do this. But at least I already know well how to create basic spreadsheets, simple functions, and Excel tables. While our usual shows were on hiatus, my husband and I watched Lucifer and Castlevania on Netflix.

Second week of January: Processed lots of timecards and missed punch forms to prepare for payroll so timecards could be approved. However, things like PTO and Department transfers were completely new to me: my old employer never paid any premium for holidays worked, let alone paid holidays taken off. There was never any such thing as vacation pay at my old job, either. Also, everyone at my old department never got transferred unless they physically worked at different offices during the week. Started actually learning procedures for the rest of the software that I finally got access to around Monday or Tuesday.

Third week of January: Finally received access to the protected folder with essential resources, and the email address that was used to communicate with vendors and suppliers. Lots of overtime commenced as I began the process to trying to catch up on the backlog left behind from when my predecessor left in mid November 2021.

Fourth week of January: Learned about monthly closing procedures, and did LOTS of scrambling to make sure as many as possible of the remaining 2021 invoices were all in the system one way or the other. More overtime. My husband and I spent time together on weekends grocery shopping and watching DC/Marvel shows on the CW, plus Superman and Lois.

The rest of 2022 SUCKED