Uncyclopedia:VFH/Spider Riders
Spider Riders (history, logs)
| Article: Spider Riders |
Score: -3 |
| Nominated by: | Zach in the Hat 22:05, 21 April 2009 (UTC) |
| For: 0 |
No for votes |
| Against: 3 |
|
← Back to summary VFH
← Back to full VFH
“Never Give Up!!!”
“You must DIE!!!!!!”
“In Soviet Russia, spider rides you!”
“Hunter's fighting kicks ass!”
Spider Riders is a 40 year old anime series that was animated by Walt Disney. It originally ran from 1966 to 1968. Sadly, nobody watched it, so by 1969,the show was huffed. For nearly 40 years, Spider Riders was, history until three companys, Bee Train, Cookie Jar and FUNimation revived it. Yet the soundtrack was so poorly preserved that they had to redo the soundtrack.Walt Disney was so pissed of that the cursed the lost show to have poor ratings like it did back in the 1960's. It was so unknown, Uncyclopedia never knew it existed, so it took a really big spider Riders fan to make this article.
Characters
Hunter Hunter is a somewhat retarded, homosexual 12 year old who gets drunk and jumps into a pit which leads to the Inner World. He then meets a gay spider named Shadow. they both get married and now work for the Spider Riders. Hunter's favorite food is Cheezecake.
Corona Corona is a sexy blonde girl who used to work for a carwash. She was recently recruited to work for the Spider Riders. Corona's favorite colour is pink and she is never seen without wearing pink.
Manted He is actully an evil totalitarian dictator that goes by the name Lord. Manted hates the turnadot people and wants to wipe out their race. But he has a soft side, Manted used to be a very happy and kind ruler that just wanted to unite the Christians and the Muslims of Invectojjian, But his wife died of cancer and that's how he became what he is today.
Buguese Buguese is the highest earning pimp in the world, His pimp hand is so powerful, that he could turn this
, into this
Aqune Aqune is Buguese's bitch. She is usually mistaken for a boy because of her short hair and boy like clothes. Aqune is not a crossdresser, though. On her free time, Aqune wites books. Two of her most famous novels are Cheezecake(2002) and the Mask of Communisim. (2006)
Lumen Prince Lumen is the Current monarch of the Arachna Kingdom. He has lots of bottles of Rum and usally gambles on his free time. Lumen's voice is usally mistanen for Stewie Griffin's voice.
Igneus (Iggy) This hardass Ukrainian Is Hunter's boss. His tall stck of blue hair is very usfull for storing things. In fact, Igneus stores everything he owns in his hair, His pictures, his money, his vodka, his crucifix, his gun, virturally everything is in his hair. But he's usually mistaken for Marge Simpson.
Evolution
Not all charachters looked the same as they did back in 1968. Bee Train wanted some charachters to have a more Anime look. Here's why.
Corona 1968
2008
Manted 1968
2008
Aqune 1968
2008
Megma 1968
2008
Just the Facts
Here are a few embarrasing facts about the Spiders and their Riders, no need to be harsh, but it's all true.
- Hunter still wets his bed
- Grasshop, Manted's cheif engineer, is seceretly gay, hope his wife didn't read this!
- Hortia, Princess Sparkle's spider, has a severe speech problem and whatever comes out of her mouth is shrill gibberish.
- Megma's Muscles aren't real, he's really an obese person that does lots of sit-ups.
- Aqune only has one eye, her left eye is the real one, her right eye however, is glass.
- Manted was born as a girl, he changed his gender, but kept his breasts.
- Why Shadow is such a know-it-all is because his parents were so F****ing rich and spoiled him when he was a Child.
- Corona wasn't blonde he whole life, she was born with red hair.
- The reason why Lumen has a Mad Scientist voice is still unclear, experts say Lumen endured early Puberty.
- Igneus may look like a brave, strong warrior, But when nobody sees him, he curls up and sucks his thumb.
- Corona's breasts are fake
- Hunter's favorite TV show is the Telletubbys.
- Lumen goes to strip bars every weekend, so that's why he is horny when he sees beauitful girls.
- Aqune isn't Buguese's only bitch, Buguese scores with hundereds of other girls like her.
- Hunter is homeless, if he can't pay his hotel room, poor Hunter is forced to live on the streets.
- Lumen has to wear a fake Muscle suit and uses a flesh-coloured garden huse as his crotch to make him appealing to the girls.
- Dungobeet, Manted's messenger, is Autistic.
Other Problems
Invecteds aren't the only problem that the Spider Riders Face, In fact, the list is endless. These are things that Igneus wants Huffed;
- Prostitutes
- Drug Dealers
- Hobos
- Hippies
- Kitten Huffers
- Junkies
- Emos
- Goths
- Red Links
- Fred
- Hannah Montana
- KKK
and that's the beginning of the list, Imagine how many problems ony eight people can huff at a time? All what the Spider Riders need to do is to Relax a Little...
