Support@abingdon.org.uk

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The conflict was highly noted for its brutality, as seen here in one bloody insurgent assault on Unsoc forces occupying the forums.

Support@abingdon.org.uk was a highly-controversial conflict in the Uncyclopedia community whose end with a monumental vote epically changed the direction of the website and formed the foundation of which the Uncyclopedia currently stands on. It is regarded as one of the most epic and groundbreaking issues on Uncyclopedia, rivaling and even superseding the Euroipods Crusade, The Great Aspie War of Ought Six, and Uncyclopedia vs Powershot, Flamewar of the Ages. It is remembered for its brutality, complete violation of the rules of engagement, and the heinous war crimes of which only became apparent until the months after the conflict's end. The outcome left many Uncyclopedians scarred, yet at the same time it strengthened the entire community as a whole. It prevented a possible revolution by the Uncyclopedia Worker's Party and reaffirmed the Grue Army's status as being a powerful military force.

The lowdown[edit | edit source]

What a wonderful place this would be if only Unsoc had started a proletarian revolution and seized control of Uncyclopedia.

After the assassination of Chronarion by the magic bullet of Tom Harvey Osfair, a highly respected member of both Unsoc and high-ranking soldier in the Grue Army, an order was issued from Wikia Ambassador to Uncyclopedia Sannse that Uncyclopedia would be maintained by Nobody until its leader could be replaced. Outraged, the Grue Army appointed Oscar Wilde as its de facto leader while Unsoc claimed its socialist candidate Sophia should be appointed.

The disagreeing factions were both overruled by the Administration of Administrators and Ministry of Love, who claimed there would be, "No official leader of Uncyclopedia, as it functions sufficiently as a community. Give us pie." Others, citing North Korea's Kim Il-Sung as a similar popular example, suggested Uncyclopedia keep the deceased Chronarion as leader and establish a "necrocracy". It should be noted that sanctions by the United Nations forced Uncyclopedia to abandon its nuclear weapons program at this time.

After Osfair's arrest, the Grue Army dismissed Osfair of his duties. Unsoc, however, still considered Osfair a loyal member of the party and refused to condemn his actions. This was seen as unpatriotic by many members of the community, and Unsoc was accused of endorsing the removal of Chronarion from office. Rumors of a conspiracy began to surface, because until then Osfair was viewed as simply a crazy and lonely Wal-Mart employee who went AWOL and felt like shooting Uncyclopedia's leader for no good reason other than that he is a red pinko rat pig.

Nevertheless, the admins' decision was final according to Uncyclopedia guidelines, yet peace was not restored. Unsoc and the Grue Army grew further apart, and users were forced to choose between the two groups. Many users didn't care.

Insurgency[edit | edit source]

The series of violent conflicts within Uncyclopedia that occurred were often referred to as a "civil war", though it technically was not. Page blanking, vandalism, IRC floods, and flamewars were rampant during this period of time. Though no formal declaration of war was made, hostilities within Uncyclopedia were abundant.

The only known photo of Jedravent, seen here relaxing and contemplating shooting Tom Harvey Osfair with his 9mm. handgun.

Encyclopedia Dramatica took the opportunity to weaken a wounded animal and aided in the anarchy and chaos erupting on Uncyclopedia by sending in numerous trolls. The admins quickly put Uncyclopedia under martial law as a result, and the Grue Army sent Encyclopedia Dramatica the following brief message:

"It has come to our attention that you have been equipping and encouraging attacks against Uncyclopedia. The free-editing community will not tolerate those who harbor vandalism. Please stop it. Also, did you delete our TiVo recording of Office Space?"

Assassination[edit | edit source]

Conspiracy theorists were more than pleased when Tom Harvey Osfair was shot and killed during his jail transfer by Jedravent, who yelled, "Osfair!" before popping a cap in his ass. Jedravent is a notable member of the Grue Army, and was thus seen as being a possible participant in a grand conspiracy by the Grue Army to have Chronarion wacked, and his wacker wacked off. The Grue Army did not deny nor confirm the theories at first, but has since taken complete responsibility.

Resolution[edit | edit source]

Main article: This thing

One valiant user hidden behind the cloak of an IP, who is only now known as "195.70.73.197", proposed a democratic resolution to the issue: a vote. Known as Resolution: Support@abingdon.org.uk, the vote was proposed on October 4th, which has since been declared Uncyclopedia Independence Day. Prominent Uncyclopedia figures voiced their opinions on the matter:

Spang
Hinoa

With a vote of 971 yays to 2.8 nays, the proposal was passed and peace was restored. Chronarion assumed position as absolute ruler of Uncyclopedia once again after the use of numerous Phoenix Downs to revive him, and Tom Harvey Osfair was pardoned, though he was never revived. Status quo ante bellum was reestablished (though nobody quite knows what this means) and all was well. The birds were chirping, the editors were whoring, and the administrators were long back to their joys of crushing infidels with an iron fist.

See also[edit | edit source]