Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/March 3

March 3: Beat Strangers to Death With a Lead Pipe Day

• 1931 - The U.S. adopts The Star-Spangled Banner as the national anthem, instead of Battle Hymn of the Republic, which is objectively a better anthem.
• 1938 - Oil is discovered in Saudi Arabia, camel herders use it as a garnish for their camel steaks.
• 1972 - Jethro Tull releases an album based on what they consider "the most epic poem they've ever read in their life".
• 1991 - An amateur video captures Rodney King rudely getting in the way of LAPD officer's jackbooted feet.
• 1992 - The practice of beating strangers to death with lead pipes (Pictured) first emerges in Post-Soviet Belarus.
• 2007 - A misplaced comma found in the 1st edition of Infinite Jest haunts David Foster Wallace for the rest of his days.
• 2017 - Nintendo releases the Nintendo Switch, a device used to preoccupy your little brothers while you wash the pots and pans.
• 2018 - The UN bans the practice of beating strangers to death with lead pipes, due to concerns about lead poisioning.

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