HowTo:Be Mean

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Here are some steps on how to be an total Asshole, it is simple really, first we will explain what a Meanie is and what it takes to be one. Pay Attention, or else you will be a total failure in life and be rejected by everyone. Possibly, end up a crackhead, you don't want that, do you?

A typical meanie.

What is a Meanie?[edit | edit source]

A meanie is a person who wants to be an total Asshole to everyone. And will do whatever it takes to get to you. There are plenty in this world. You can find them at Work, at School, at the Park, at the Carnival, at the Mall, at the Pub, Etc. They are everywhere and you can never escape it.

So if you can't beat them, join them! There are plenty of victims to pick on, just as much as there are meanies, plenty to go around!

List of Victims to poke at![edit | edit source]

1. Jews

2. Blacks (Warning: you might get gang-raped.)

3. Muslims (Warning: They might got a bomb strapped on anytime ready to blow)

4. Arabs (See Muslims)

5. Hispanics (Warning: They are A LOT)

6. Gypsies

7. Chinese People

8. Jonas Brothers Fans

9. Gays

10. Lesbians

11. Canadians

12. Americans

13. Fat People

And anybody you feel you can dick with!

List of things to do/say to be a Total Asshole[edit | edit source]

- Deny a victims existence in the Holocaust.

- Call your Girlfriend's father a pussy in an attempt to make him cry.

- Ask an Hispanic the minimum wage at Home Depot.

- Boss around people at your new job.

- join the Westboro Baptist Church

- Sing the National Anthem of the United States wrong.

- Tease a starving African Child with food.

- When playing videogames, wait until your friend leaves the room and unplug his controller. Then when you start playing again laugh in his face as character loses the game/his life.

- Buy a paintball gun and shoot your friends in the shins.

- Kick someone in the balls.

- Go by someone at the mall or busy area and yell "What the FUCK!" right in their ear, and keep walking.

- Laugh at a Kid with cancer on his deathbed.

- Tell someone wearing an outfit they shouldn't that they look great.

- Pretend you like a girl just to get into her pants / Seduce her with lies.

- Make funny faces at deformed people.

List of Famous Meanies[edit | edit source]

☭= Commies

卍= Nazis

卍+☭ = Commie Nazis.

-Hitler

-Stalin

-Perez Hilton ☭ 卍

-Sean Hannity

-Tom Cruise

-Borat ☭ 卍

-8=D

-Bill O Reilly

Hitler[edit | edit source]

Hitler(1889-1945) was famous for poking at Jews,Gypsies, Russians, and Polish people. Back when he was just 16, he had a deep passion for art, he loved many people and made many friends. One day, when he was art school, he was rejected by his Jewish teacher. He got depressed and started drinking, falling asleep on in the streets. He now hated everyone, including himself, he fell into deep emotional distress and started dressing like a Emo. Eventually he got arrested. He was then forced into the military to fight World War I to kill some Amerikans. He earned a high rank and was respected.

His inspiring words got him to be Chancellor of Germany. He improved relations with the Holy Kaiser of Kentucky and he improved Germany's economy. He became very mean towards Jews, pulling pranks like putting shaving cream on their hands and tickling there nose as they sleep. Or Jacking Off on their biscuit while they are not looking.

His pranks got worse and he started picking on more and more people, The Russians would not tolerate it, and Stalin kicked Hitler's ass. Hitler was so humiliated he killed himself.

Stalin[edit | edit source]

Stalin dressed as Borat on Halloween when he was 7 years old.

Joseph Stalin(1878-1953) was a Commie Russian that loved Picking on Nazi's, Jews, Americans, Just about anyone. He was the Leader of Russia since the day he was born, he started pulling pranks on Jews by kicking them out of his country and point and laugh as they got caught by Nazi's, one by one.

Eventually, Hitler and Stalin got together to gang rape one Jew in a Alley Way. The Jew was scarred for life. Hitler slowly started doing pranks on Stalin, eventually got worse. Stalin got totally pissed and felt betrayed. He kicked Hitler's ass hard until Hitler killed himself of humiliation. Celebrating, Stalin ate 911 cheeseburgers, a stroke was a result, he died. :D

Sean Hannity[edit | edit source]

Sean Hannity(????)-(???) is an Conservative Talk show host who likes to pick on Liberals, Democrats, Communists,Obama, and anyone who is not American or Roman Catholic.

Born in rural Kentucky, Hannity grew up in a Conservative family. When he was just four years old, he pretended he was on fox news by getting a bunch of his toy dolls and sitting them at a table with him, where he would go on how "Wiberism" is wrong and "Cuntervism" is right.

He got his own Talk Radio when he got older and called it the Sean Hannity show, where he bases Democratic Politicians.. He also likes to pick on Muslims by picking his Pubic Hairs and sprinkling them on there cake why they're not looking

8=D[edit | edit source]

8=D(4200-4201) was a famous explorer who discovered famous treasures and trekked jungles where no man would go. He likes to tease Vaginas, Titties, and mouths. He likes to spray whip cream all over the Vagina. 8=D died on 4201 after getting run over by a Steam roller.