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September 22: Autumnal Unquinox
- 1465 - Aztec tourists discover autumn in the resort town of Equinox, Vermont.
- 1785 - Britain fails to recognise this day any longer, after realising that "the weather's always crap, every bloody day!"
- 1867 - New Englanders genetically modify trees to change colors in autumn, as part of a plan to lure Southern tourists back North after the Civil War. The plan fails when the first Southern tourists complain about the integration of colored trees with non-colored trees.
- 1960 - Dr. Seuss' Green Eggs and Ham is first published, provoking the law that Best Before Date stickers are to be put on all eggs and ham. This law was later extended to include all perishable food items and Michael Jackson's career.
- 2001 - The Federal Communications Commission places largely ignored ban on the use of Fall as a synonym for Autumn, citing complaints by family members of September 11 victims.
- 2018 - Interstate 95 is completed in Jew Jersey. Previously, there was a 30 mile gap, in which there was nothing. However, now that no one was getting summer heat death, it could be expanded.