User:Frinko/Pokemon
- If you are unsure about editing this article (yes it is a User subpage), please see this article's talk page.
This user has been inactive on Uncyclopedia for more than one year.
Some content has been removed from their userpage to help keep Uncyclopedia tidy. If this is your userpage, please feel free to restore that content and remove this template. |
- Note: This article is a take off on this one. The other version is funnier and less stupid so you might just want to check that one out instead.
“I LUVS ME ME POKEEMANS!!!”
“Oooooh... someone's following us!!”
“Dey see me rollin... dey hatin...”
“Pokeyman! Pokeyman with the Pokey and the Man and the thing where the guy comes out of the thing, and he makes a fraaagh fr fra aagh aagh aagh!”
“why did I create these little freaks?”
“Ling-Ling is the only Pokemon i would ever use!”
“Pokémon is the slave trade, and Pikachu is the slavemaster!”
“My pokemon brings all the nerds to the yard and they are all like you wanna trade cards and im like damn right i wanna trade cards, all except for my charizard”
“You F*** me and I'll f*** you, Pokemon!”
“The show went downhill when Dawn came in.”
“Meanwhile in Pokemon XY2KASH: CLEMONT WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
CLEMONT: IM MAKING MY BODY HEAT RISE TO COOL DOWN MY INTERNAL TEMPERATURE
ASH: AND WHAT IS THAT DEVICE CALLED THAT YOUR HOLDING?
CLEMONT: THATS MY P**IS
ASH: WOW IVE NEVER EVEN HEARD OF THAT BEFORE
BONNIE: CLEMONT SHOW ASH HOW YOUR P**IS WORKS
CLEMONT: BONNIE?!
BONNIE: COME ON BIG BROTHER ITS NOT LIKE ITS GOING TO EXPLODE
ASH: YEAH CLEMONT IM REALLY INTERESTED IN YOUR P**IS
CLEMONT: WELL OK THE FUTURE IS NOW THANKS TO SCIENCE!
ASH LOOKING AT CLEMONTS P**IS:
WOW SCIENCE IS SO AMAZING
”
“The only reason why I let Misty, May, and Dawn follow me around is so that I can rape them after.”
“So thats why misty and all dem leave.”
“the only reason why I hang around ash is so I can bash brock.”
“In Soviet Russia, pokeball throws you!”
“so i herd u liek mudkipz!”
“I've found God 3 times, but I can't find Entei!!”
Pachirisu, the completely useless Pokemon.
Pokémon is the thing where the guy comes out of the thing. Children like to play this.
Pokémon (ポケモン) is a multi-billion dollar franchise owned by the Nintendo corporation, based around the worship, torture and capture of strange creatures.
Although all of the games consist of the Poké and the Man, also known as the Monster,
there have been many different Pokémon titles, each more unique than the last.
For instance, Pokemon Gold and Silver introduced Pokemon breeding, where Pokemon get their groove thang on and then lay eggs with new Pokemon that have funny moves. Likewise, Ruby and Sapphire played off this and introduced the concept of having whales and cats breed together. It should be noted that this breeding activity suggests to children that old people have no idea what sex is, because they always say they have no idea how Pokemon eggs get created. Worshipers of Pokemon claim that Digimon is the antichrist, although Digimon worshippers claim the reverse.
The games were given colours, reflecting their ulterior motives. (Spoiler)
- Red - This was so called because on completion, it would take the name of the child that was entered at the start and sign them up for the communist party and reposess all their stuff.
- Blue - Pregnant. Sofvbg nvvh gmetimes hard to tell.
- Green - Was faintly radioactive. The further the child got, still hyg the ash is a@#!$#^%*&^^%#@%$#^%$^%&^%%& the less human they became. Or their hair fell out. Whatever.
- Yellow - Would encourage homosexual tendencies, to develop later in life.
- Gold - Actually made of gold. Usually got stolen by the kid's crack and meth addicted parents, so that it could be sold off.
- Silver, Platinum - See above, except Platinum belongs to Diamond and Pearl.
- Crystal, Ruby, Sapphire, Emerald - Much like the original makers, I'm running out of ideas here...
- Diamond, Pearl- Much like Gold and Silver, but encrusted with precious gems.
- Black, White- Encouraged people that one race was superior over the other.
List of games
Pokémon Red | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Barack Obama play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Red
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Green | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Dr. Robotnik play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Green
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Blue | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Dracula play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Blue
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Yellow | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Jack Daniels play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Yellow
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Gold | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Mel Gibson play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Gold
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Silver | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Sylvester the Cat play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Silver
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Crystal | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would DWIII play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Crystal
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Ruby | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Your Mom play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Ruby
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Sapphire | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Donald Cedric Orlando Aloisius Augustus Cornelius Tascalusa Octavius Elphinstone Eugene Frederick Dionysus Pikachu Davros The Third play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Sapphire
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Fire Red | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would King Boo play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Fire Red
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Leaf Green | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would Jimmy Hoffa play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Leaf Green
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Emerald | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Nintendo |
Genre | Slavery sim |
Platform(s) | Game Boy |
Rating | 1/10 |
Would This Guy play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Emerald
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Sentret after seeing the awesome Wargreymon on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Sonic starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crcandy addicted gamer on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition. This is actually a really good videogame. You should play it sometime.
Pokémon Diamond | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Chuck Norris |
Release date | to United States children for mind-control |
Genre | Enslavement |
Platform(s) | GameBoy |
Rating | Diamond |
Would John Travolta play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Diamond
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Jigglypuff after seeing the kick-ass Charizard on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Charizard starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crack addicted whore on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition.
Pokémon Pearl | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Chuck Norris |
Release date | to United States children for mind-control |
Genre | Enslavement |
Platform(s) | GameBoy |
Rating | Pearl |
Would Crazy Frog play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Pearl
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Jigglypuff after seeing the kick-ass Charizard on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Charizard starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crack addicted whore on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition.
Pokémon Platinum | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Chuck Norris |
Release date | to United States children for mind-control |
Genre | Enslavement |
Platform(s) | GameBoy |
Rating | Platinum |
Would Cat the Colourful play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Platinum
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Jigglypuff after seeing the kick-ass Charizard on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Charizard starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crack addicted whore on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition.
Pokémon HeartGold | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Chuck Norris |
Release date | to United States children for mind-control |
Genre | Enslavement |
Platform(s) | GameBoy |
Rating | HeartGold |
Would Oliver Twist play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon HeartGold
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Jigglypuff after seeing the kick-ass Charizard on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Charizard starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crack addicted whore on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition.
Pokémon SoulSilver | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Chuck Norris |
Release date | to United States children for mind-control |
Genre | Enslavement |
Platform(s) | GameBoy |
Rating | SoulSilver |
Would Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon SoulSilver
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Jigglypuff after seeing the kick-ass Charizard on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Charizard starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crack addicted whore on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition.
Pokémon Black | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Chuck Norris |
Release date | to United States children for mind-control |
Genre | Enslavement |
Platform(s) | GameBoy |
Rating | Black |
Would Freddy Krueger play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon Black
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Jigglypuff after seeing the kick-ass Charizard on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Charizard starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crack addicted whore on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition.
Pokémon White | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Japanese |
Publisher(s) | Chuck Norris |
Release date | to United States children for mind-control |
Genre | Enslavement |
Platform(s) | GameBoy |
Rating | White |
Would AAA play it? | Not likely |
Pokémon White
Child mind-control at its finest, Pokémon (Japanese: ポケモン) was invented by the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck and can only be permitted to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Greeks sought the implementation of the Pokémon as a means of occupying the little buggers long enough to allow the adults to sneak out to late night bingo and philosophy death-matches near the fountain south of the Parthenon.
Sadly, the Greeks were unable to occupy their children in this manner, owing to the fact that none of the little brats wanted to train their L3 Jigglypuff after seeing the kick-ass Charizard on the box, and were eventually forced to eat them or train them in the ways of beer-vending (as many beer-vendors were being killed off when the bingo and philosophy death-matches got out of hand).
When Pokémon was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, children had already developed an immunity to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Japanese Soy Sauce cooking "incidents." Greeks on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokémon careers. Charizard starred in a Japanese remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after allegedly consuming the director, Kawasaki Mitsubishi. Others, who weren't so lucky, resorted to other sources for sustenance. Jigglypuff and Ditto assumed a career as a crack addicted whore on Nevada street corners. Ditto was especially popular, as it turned into anything you wanted. Jigglypuff was forced to sing as a pathetic attempt to get some recognition.
PokéGirl, The New and Improved Version of Pokémon
PokéGirl, The New and Improved Version of Pokémon | |
---|---|
Developer(s) | The Belgians |
Publisher(s) | XaNAGuTuGANaX |
Release date | to United States children for mind-control |
Genre | Enslavement |
Platform(s) | VaginaDroid |
Rating | PokéGirl, The New and Improved Version of Pokémon |
Would Courtney Love play it? | Who wouldn't? |
Child mind-control at its finest, PokéGirl was invented by the ancient Romans to counter the invention of the ancient Greeks but was only recently released to the world at large due to significant hold-ups in the patent office, although many believe it to be the work of the underworld.
Based loosely on the conviction that kids actually suck from the day they were born and can only be taught to live insofar as they will eventually become not-kids, the Romans sought the implementation of the Pokégirl as a means of teaching the ways of the Pokégirl: lesbian sex.
Naturally, the Romans were able to teach their children in this manner, but sadly, they hadn't yet invented the technology to create lesbians. They experimented by altering the bodies of young boys, emperor Nero was the man behind this plan, but sadly all experiments failed in creating lesbian girls. Many other Romans followed in his path, but they all failed, the closest thing to a succes had always stayed just a young heterosexual androgynous boy.
When PokéGirl was finally pushed through the patent office and introduced to the world, the transformation to lesbians begun: children were developing an obsession to it by breathing toxins released into the upper atmosphere by millions of Belgian "French" Fries cooking "incidents." Romans on the other hand went on to invent one of the world's most beloved product lines. The publishment of the game launched many Pokégirl careers. Charigirl starred in a Belgian remake of the classic, "Godzilla" but was fired after having sex with the director, Kakashi Bitsuwasimi. Many others used similar sources for sustenance. Jigglygirl assumed a career as a crack addicted whore on Nevada street corners, kicking hobos.
List of Pokémon
- Ling-Ling
- Pikachu
- The Cheat
- Charmillionaire
- WeirdAloman
- Towelie
- Prophet polywag
- Flareon
- Grue
- Mewtwo
- Mudkip
- Obama
Characters
Anime
Due to the rapid sucess of the Video Games, Japan released a TV show about pokemon in anime style just to cash in more. Strangely enough, some episodes were about an elite NYPD SWAT team. Whores.
Episode List
- Pokeyman? Pokeyman with the pokey and the man and the thing where the guy comes out of the thing, and he bulb a raaagh gagh a fraaaghle ha ha ha!!
- Pikachu!
- Pikachu attacks a Pokémon!
- Team Rocket attempts to rape ash.
- James wins a beauty contest with inflatable breasts.
- Epileptic Hero Porygon.. X
- War In Brooklyn
- Super Pokémon Bros. 1
- Super Pokémon Bros. 2
- Super Pokémon Bros. 3
- Super Pokémon Bros. 4: The Revenge of Pikachu's Uncle
- Pikachu gets raped by Ash and Samus
- Pikachu dies of Tuberculosis :'(
- サトシ・ワンツ・ニガー・コック
- カスミ・レイプス・ナース・ジョーイ
- Moskau, Moskau, wirf die Gläser an die Wand, Rußland ist ein schönes Land. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! Hej! Moskau, Moskau, deine Seele ist so groß, nacht's da ist der Teufel los. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Hej!
- Halo 3 is born, what the crap, master chief whatacha doin!
- ザ・バトル・フォア・ザ・ネクスト・バッジ2
- ピカチュウ・イズ・デッド!アイ・フォーゴット!
- More Japanese Letters
- Even More Japanese Letters
- Assault on Precinct 76
- English letters (Alphabet Soup)
- ...... ♥ ♥ ♥ !!
- Pikachu Reborn‽
- Yuri Episode
- Yaoi Episode
- Yuri-Yaoi Episode
- Yaoi-Yuri Episode
- Hit Squad
- Ash catches Ling-Ling!
- Charmillionaire rides down & dirty
- Super Duper Mega Gay Orgy Episode
- Pikachu finds himself, homosexually and, goes to campus
- Jigglypuff goes on a cock-sucking rampage
- Officer Luca Kills The President
- Ash Ketchum gets killed by a giant Charizard
- The Rejoicing of Ash's death
- Pokemon fails because no one gives a shit about it anymore.
- Pikachu changes into Pikagirl, someone gives a shit about it.
- All Pokemon and other characters in the anime series change into lesbian Pokegirls, like Pikagirl, every one two and three gives a shit and much more about it.
- Ash's Resurrection
- All Pokemon Unite with the motive to assassinate Ash Ketchum, the ygo through this by covering him in ketchup with pokemon droppings in it, this caused Ashto go into a sexual frenzy and rape all of them
- Who shot Misty?
- Ash flies a helicopter and crashes
- Ash Ketchum and Misty have aholesex and doÞ recognize the impending threat (Misty is alive and well again.)
- Mewtwo moves to mind control all Pokemon so that he can hump Pikachu... because he is sooo maddly horny!
- Officer Luca busts outta jail, screaming
- Piplup joins the Pokemon National-socialist Party and takes the name of Piphitler
- 134785 New Pokemon introduced into the series; making it even more gay!!!
- Pikachu gets Fucked by Tony Blair
- All Pokemon are suddenly teleported into the World of Warcraft Universe causing mega pvp showdown annihilation,oh my god they killed Kenny!
- Nazi Pokemon regime is toppled by NYPD
- Pikachu turns to Communism
- Pikachu gets shot in Russia
- Gangster Life
- Pokemon meets (a fake) Jesus
- Shipping Fanservice Episode #1
- The Crazy Off-Model One (it looks kinda cool!)
- Jigglypuff goes on a cock sucking rampage (hell yeah)
- destroy all pikachus
- Pokemon Black and White in Color
Episodes from the future
- Episode 84: Ash's dick uses Harden.
- Episode 95: Butch and Cassidy arrive!! The meeting of the Rocket-Dan troops!! More random Japanese words!!
- Episode 143: Ash finally catches 'em all, until he learns about a new region called Kentuckistan!
- Episode 252: Brock gets shot by a redneck
- Episode 599: Dawn gets shot, and Brock gets shot... again
- Episode 617: Terrorist attack on Nimbasa City.
- Episode 1337: Obligatory 1337 joke used whenever there's a big numerical list.
- Episode 3295: Wild Chuck Norris appeared!
- Episode 4001: The one-hour special crossover episode where Naruto, James T. Kirk, Darth Vader, and Lance Bass have a wild orgy with Prof. Oak, Ash's mom, Tracey Sketchit, and Mr. Mime.
- Episode 14369: Meet the new girl, Hillary Clinton.
- just before the final episode: Pokémon meets God and the real Jesus (It is also revealed that the End of the World (as we know it) will take place in the next episode.)
- Final episode: The Pokégirl-Virus evolves/digivolves in the SuperUltraMegaUltimateDivineGigaGodessPokéGirl-UltraGigaUndefeatableImmortalVirus and transforms every living thing in the Pokéverse and in the universe(s) were the Pokémon animé is aired into ExaTeraHotLesbianSuperUltraMegaUltimateDivineGigaGodessPokéGirls who are UltraGigaUndefeatableImmortal. Before this, Ash
accidentallywalks in on Misty, May, Dawn, Iris, and so on.... while they aregetting ready for a showerabout to masturbate. Hilarity ensues!
Anime Screens
Trivia
- Dschinghis Khan makes an appearance in one episode. Coincidentally, the same episode is in the Guinness Book of World Records for "Longest Title of a TV Show Episode.
- Somehow, Officer Luca & the other NYPD SWAT members in the TV series were the only characters to not change into lesbian Pokégirls, possibly because their storyline had Jack Schitt to do with the main storyline of the TV series. That, or because New Yawkahs are immune to LPGS (Lesbian PokéGirl Syndrome)
- It is sugested that the PokéGirl-virus is reactivated and evolves/digivolves because of the distortion in the space-time continuum when Ash walks in on nude Misty, about to masturbate. It is also suggested that Ash and Misty merge into eachother forming Mistashy because of the distortion in the space-time continuum, before the virus takes over the cosmos.
- The SUMUDGGPG-UGUIV-virus will invade this world as soon as it is shown on TV (TransVader) and will infect every living thing transforming it into an UGUI-ETHLSUMUDGGPG, it is not sure if it will work on the Undead and Ghosts and it surely will not work on the Dead, but as the UGUI-ETHLSUMUDGGPG have an unlimited amount of ETHLSUMUDGGPG-powers, they could destroy or disform/transform them to their likings.
- An alien race that resembles humans actually named themselves after a Pokemon (Altaria) that they regarded as a god..