Independent State of Croatia
- This article is about the Nazi puppet state. For the nation which gained independence in 1991, see Croatia.
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| Motto (official): "For Great Chieftain, We Are Ready"
Motto (unofficial): "Hrvatska do Kosova" | |||||
| National Anthem: Moja Štikla (My High Heel) | |||||
| Official language | German | ||||
| Capital | Jasenovac | ||||
| Government | Faithful, liberal, independent and democratic. | ||||
| President | Ante Pavelić aka Napaljenić (Mr. Horny) | ||||
| Languages | Every language, but never Serbian | ||||
| National Hero | Gianni Versace, Oscar Wilde, George Michael | ||||
| Independence | 143 BC from Roman Empire. | ||||
| Currency | Fox, only exchangeable for brandy or captured Serbs | ||||
| Religion | Fashion, Liberal Islam | ||||
“I like the way they treat people”
“ I enjoyed my time in Jasenovac, NDH. So many fresh and alive victims for free, completely legal. They even praised me as a hero there. ”
“I don't have time for smelly, annoying, Muslim people ”
“Ante Pavelic was a perfect example to every faithful human servant”
“Ja, das war gut, aber die blode homosexuelle...”
The Independent State of Croatia (Serbo-Croatian: Nezavisna Država Hrvatska, Независна Држава Хрватска, NDH; German: Unabhängiger Staat Kroatien; Italian: Stato Indipendente di Croazia), often referred to simply by the abbreviation NDH, was a short-lived marionette state established by the Germans during the Second World War.
The original idea came from Adolf Hitler himself who was enchanted by Ante Pavelić, the leader of Croatia's rebel forces who were trying to separate Croatia from the rest of Yugoslavia. Pavelić's transsexual alter ego dubbed Tante Hildegard quickly drew Hitler's attention during his visit to Croatia so he decided to turn Croatia into a large fashion empire with both creative and industrial workforce. Pavelić was well known in the local political circles for his cool Pokèmon card collection, unlike his associate Jure Francetić (better known as Franziska) who was a bit more sophisticated, only dealt with Digimon trading cards. This very much infuriated Pavelić who would later have him executed. As he felt that that the flamboyant cute nature of the Pokèmon better matched his inner anime girl spirit. There was evidence that Mussolini attmpted to get Pavlić into Yu-Gi-Oh cards telling him that it is Hitler’s preferred choice of gaming cards. However, despite Pavelić’s propensity to be easily manipulated and bootlick the next pair of boots he sees, and exploiting Pavlić’s loyalty to his master, he remained true to the Pokèmon cause. Which would later lay the foundation for his hatred of Serbs. As the Serb dominant government in the Kingdom of Yugoslavia banned the practice of Pokèmon card games deeming them “totally gay”. Forever imprinting in Pavlića genocidal rage of revenge.
Pavelić had a plan to legalize gay marriages in NDH and change the state's name into DDH (Dugina Država Hrvatska which means Rainbow State Croatia) but the straight Jews disagreed, so he sent them to concentration camps, because he was convinced that death and pain would change their mind. Serbians in Croatia were sent to camps too, because Pavelić thought that their clothes were too plain, and not colorful and cheesy as he imagined it. Straight Croats against the fashion regime suffered the same fate. However homosexual Serbs were left alone as long as they followed the seasonal dress code post Labor day.
Pavelić had help from Ustaše (the name comes from ustati-stand up in Croatian and it means that Ustaše were trying to make Croatian people more fashion oriented). Surprisingly, Ustaše's uniforms were pretty much ordinary, only the inside was made of bright pink polyester with a leopard pattern.
Despite their bad reputation, concentration camps in Croatia have a significant role in the history of fashion because their influence is still visible today, as skinny-looking (later known as anorexic ) body was thought to be the most important factor in one's appearance. Modern catwalk shows also draw inspiration from the camp's daily exercise programs and some contemporary supermodels, like Naomi Campbell , still act as past camp supervisors.
NDH Today[edit | edit source]
Nowadays, NDH and Ustaše are a symbol of Croatian conservatives, and they are trying to bring back the NDH and make it a DDH. They even have a political party called HSP, which stands for Hrvatska Stranka Prava (Croatian Party Of Right) mostly because they are convinced that they are right, and the rest of the Croatia (aprox. 99%) is wrong. They also have the HČSP party, which stands for Hrvatska Čista Stranka Prava (Croatian Clean Party Of Right) mostly because they are convinced that only, and only they are right, and the rest of Croatia (99,99,99%) is wrong. Also, most of their members are allergic to dust.
The party leader is Anto Đapić , but will soon resign due to aesthetic reasons. Some say that his successor will be Mirjana Sanader , the husband of Croatian current prime minister, Ivo Sander. Historically famous fashion activities are still present, and are led by Boris Banović , Marko Grubnić and Neven Ciganović but in a more conventional way than before. Party leaders and supporter usually gather on events such as Cro a Porter or Wella Fashion Week to discuss their next step on how to convert Croatia into DDH again (both Grubić and Banović have published books about it).
During the Croatia's War For Independence, the party decided to take a break from its activities, but it is well known that war criminals Milošević and Tuđman had a sexual relationship. Some sources claim that while sodomizing Milošević in Karađorđevo, Tuđman had also a sexual affair - through the back door so to speak - with the rather unattractive but experienced Alija Izetbegović.
Celebrities In Croatia That Suppor The NDH Idea[edit | edit source]
Not all NDH supporters are in HSP, some of them are have independent parties, such as Ljubo Česić Royce. Other famous supporters include: Mladen Schwartz, Pero Kovačević, Marijana Petir, Josip Bozanić... The singer Marko Perković who took his stage name Thompson from a primitive, home made Shoehorn from the era. However, not all prominent supporters are welcomed by the HSP officials, as the macedonian singer Toše Proeski was murdered for being too straight, according to the official police report.
Ljubo Česić Royce
Mladen Schwartz
Pero Kovačević
Mr. Bean
