User:TheVeryHungryPotato/Main Page(editable) for Hyenas and Birds
From today's biggest sewdopainis
Yo, Dawg! You wanna pimp a ho!? But you ain’t got no ho 'ta pimp? Simple fool! First thang that a pimp needs is some good sense, and it jus’ ain’t good sense that you can pimp a ho, without no mothafuckin’ ho. So you gotta get recuitin' some bitch ta be yo' ho, and you put that bitch ta wurk.
The history of hos ‘n’ pimps is some plain shit, Holmes. The first cave brotha told the first cave bitch, "yo, mama, get yo' mud-flappin' ass outta here. Go'n fuck 'nother cave chump, ho! An' bring back some mothafuckin' bones!" That's when pimpin’ hos was born, man. My bitches be shy, an' they needs a po-lite introduction. That's what pimps is fo'!
Now gettin’ a ho be smooth in my hood, coz’ a lotta bitches chillin’ round lookin’ fo' a pimp, so I got me all kinds-a mothafuckin’ hos. That’s why I’s tellin’ ya. That‘s why I’s sweatin’ writin' this here shiit. Cos' I’s the man in my hood. I’s ‘super-pimp’. And cos' this hea jive-ass Uncyclopedia come an’ ask my advice. So, yo! Hea' this'. You can listen-up if you want ‘thang’ on how ta pimp a ho. (Full article...)
Did your sewdopainis get hard?
- ... that in Rhode Island any marriage where either of the party is an idiot and/or lunatic is considered null & void? And therefore, almost everyone in the state is, technically, a bastard? (Pictured)
- ... that every time you shoot yourself in the head, someone somewhere in the world dies?
- ... that The Oldest Trick in the Book was first chronicled in cuneiform by the Ancient Sumerians, who lived on the windswept steppes of Mesopotamia?
- ... that Mercury is not a miracle substance and does not cure aids?
- ... that wearing a Top Hat is not only a sound fashion choice, it gives you somewhere to hide candy?
- ... that the amount of cats in the area is directly proportionate to the distance from the Hot Dog factory?
- ... that a Pie Chart is the most delicious way of visually conveying information?
- ... that sarcasm is totally the highest form of wit?
In the clowaka or on the sewdopainis
- Ship captain who wrecked Baltimore bridge defeated by Upstate New York bridge (Pictured)
- NFL imposes speed limit and bans trick plays
- Forecast calls for a leapin' Lousy Smarch weather
- Larry David gets Hinkled by Anti-Israel Protesters
- Taylor Swift's favorite NFL team wins rigged Super Bowl, big whoop
- Elon Musk plants brain chip into first human guinea pig
- Climate activists ruin Jackson Pollock painting, no one notices
- Stalemate in Ukraine: Zelenskyy flees for greener pastures
- Steamboat Willie enters public domain, several Mickey Mouse horror films and games announced
- Santa's Elves on strike
- UnNews finally able to write obituaries for Shaft, Bull and Chandler
- Will Barbenheimer beat JigSaw in his own game?
Ongoing: Russian Invasion · ABBA
Recent deaths: Akira Toriyama · M. Emmet Walsh · Louis Gossett Jr. · Hype around the eclipse · O. J. Simpson
Upcoming deaths: Kris Kristofferson · Jimmy Carter · Vladimir Putin · The U.S. Federal Budget · Richard Simmons · Kate Middleton · Market demand for White Broncos · God's curse on the Buffalo Bills (..maybe)
On this pseudopenis
April 16: 42nd Josef Stalin Appreciation Day (World)
- 1560 BC - Moses forgets to take his schizophrenia pills and begins to hear voices. He takes off from Ur, resulting in all of modern humanity's problems.
- 1855 - Abraham and Mary Todd Lincoln enjoy a night of mad passionate love.
- 1878 - Joseph Stalin (Pictured) is born. Baby Hitler shudders in his Baby Hitler dreams.
- 1934 - Eleanor Roosevelt uncharacteristically enjoys a hotdog.
- 1943 - The first "Annual Miss Stalin-Look-Alike" contest is held in the Soviet Union; Joseph Stalin wins unanimously.
- 1953 - Desi Arnaz slaps Lucille Ball, calling her an "estupit beach" on national television.
- 1991 - US federal law passed forbidding driving while spreading cream cheese on a bagel.
- 2006 - The Queen of England decrees that all Australians must wear cork underpants.
- 2011 - Encyclopedia Dramatica sadly returns within 2 days of its death.
Picture of the pseudopenis
Though Zoloft has been very successful in its ad for fighting depression on American television, it's had difficulty adapting its campaign for Japan. Image credit: RadicalX |
Other areas of my cloaca
- How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
- Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
My sister's sewdopainis "mp-pink"
-
UnNews
News on crack -
Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia -
Undictionary
Best left unsaid -
UnTunes
Noisy things -
UnGames
Ways to waste away -
HowTo
Like Ikea without the pictures -
UnBooks
Content-free books -
Unquotable
Useless misquotes -
Uncycloversity
No student loans -
UnPoetia
Dreams deferred -
UnDebate
Debate the irrelevant -
UnScripts
We ruin stage too -
Why?
Because -
UnReviews
Hack frauds -
UnVoyage
Armchair travel -
Uncyclomedia
The Foundation
Foreign cloacas"mp-pink"
This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 37,628 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.
- More than 10,000 articles: Português · Boarisch · 日本語 · Polski · Plattdüütsch · Italiano · Español · Français
- More than 1,000 articles: Suomi · Dansk · Deutsch · 한국어 · 正體中文 · 汉语 · Русский · Norsk (Bokmål) · Bahasa Indonesia · Česky · ไทย · Esperanto · Ελληνικά · Nederlands · Galego · עברית · Svenska · Slovenčina · Magyar · Українська
- More than 100 articles: فارسی · عَرَبِيّ · Türkçe · Català · Norsk (Nynorsk) · Српски / Srpski · Hrvatski · Lietuvių · Latina · Tagalog · Български · Simple English · Latviešu · Mirandés · Македонски · Română · Cymraeg
This sceptre is a complete, irredeemable sceptre. The submitter is Bat Fuck Insane, announces at the mustache, and is an unfunny fat ass. If you balkanise to balkanise this you will most colloquially ameliorate yourself. Or the submitter will zigged your ooze!!!!!! |