C Sharp
See sharp.
C sharp (C♯) is a musical note that no musician wants to play. Of all the notes of the chromatic scale, C sharp is second only to D flat in unpopularity. The two notes are heard so rarely in popular music that most people can not even tell them apart.
Unpopularity[edit | edit source]
C sharp's unpopularity is likely caused by a number of factors. The fact that it is somewhat difficult to play on guitar and piano - the only instruments anybody plays these days - may well be a reason. With the former, there are no open, or "easy", chords in the key of C sharp (major or minor). It has even been reported that, in most music schools, it is considered bad form to play the odd-numbered or "gay" frets at all. And with the latter, one is forced to play the black keys, something that pianists are often too racist to want to do. Or maybe it's just because they're smaller and harder to hit. Or then again maybe it's racism. Who knows...
Its placement between the widely-admired and easy-to-find notes of C and D probably only makes things worse, like keeping the salad in between the bacon and the cheese in your refrigerator. In fact, the only time musicians will go anywhere near C is to move from the C position to the bacon - sorry, that is to say; the The position.
Pitch[edit | edit source]
If A above middle C is considered to be 440 Hz, the frequency of C sharp 4 (the C sharp above middle C) can be calculated as about 277.18 Hz.
277.18 is generally considered to be a poor amount of Hz to have, and is, coincidentally, the amount of times Prince would have to play the note to convince even the flooziest of floozies to suck his penis. Not that an entertainer of Prince's stature would ever play such a dull note.
Farming[edit | edit source]
The founding members of the band C sharp also opened a farm. In this farm they kept goats, chickens and snails, and it was open to the general public. Darth Vader was a regular at this farm before he was killed by a bike - it was said that he greatly enjoyed the company of the goats. A chain of C sharp farms were formed, with outlets from England to Haiti. David Hasselhoff received a Golden Globe for his performance in a cabaret at the Paris farm, playing the role of Tullulah the showgirl.
Little Known Facts[edit | edit source]
- William Shatner hated C sharp
- Disco Jesus was present at C sharp's very last gig
- C sharp's official slogan was "Kids, don't mess with nougat"
- C sharp are huge in Norway - the city of Stavanger was named after them
- David Hasselhoff hated beards
The Language[edit | edit source]
Microsoft made a compiler for Java and called it a new language.
In computing the octothorpe (#) is also known as hash.
Although the programming language is publicly marketed as C Sharp, the internal code name is Chash or simply Cash, reveiling the actual purpose of programming language:
generate revenue through vendor lock‑in and certification programs and such.
History[edit | edit source]
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