User:Sharkbait1986

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This user enjoys staring at spinning objects. They may be afflicted with Attention Deficit look at the birdie!

You can help by paying for their Ritalin, or finding them a kitten to play with.


United States
This user is American
…and unabashedly proud of it!
(List of American Uncyclopedians)
United States
This user is a boy and wields a penis happy stick.
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This user's future is so bright, they've gotta wear shades.
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This user is a geek.
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This user would be a professional procrastinator, but they can't be bothered.
GOY
This user is so Gentile that they cringe every time Barbara Streisand shows up.
GOY
UBX
This user opposes other users screwing with their userboxes.
UBX
Eeek!
This user steals userboxes from random people's user pages.
Eeek!
Woof! Woof! Woof! Ruff! Ruff Ruff! Arf! Arf!
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This user is not and has never been Napoleon.
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This *bleep* user likes to *bleep* the use of *bleep* *bleep* profanity *bleep*
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This user believes the Mozilla Firefox could easily defeat Godzilla.
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This user likes to use userboxes.
usbx
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This user is easily distracted by anything shiny.
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This user is not a number,
they are a free person!
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Just because I think everyone is trying to kill me doesn't mean they aren't. You know what I mean?
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This user is a Mad Scientist.
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subliminal!
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This user does not have a user page at Wikipedia because he or she thinks that they take things way too seriously over there.
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This user is being held hostage in a Chinese fortune cookie factory! A bachelor can only chase a girl until she catches him. Help!
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This user can be found on the Ucyclopedia Frappr.
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Uncyclopedia:Babel
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This user is a native speaker of Galactic Basic Standard.
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This user is a native speaker of Bullet and can fire high-caliber rounds in full-automatic mode.
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This user is a native speaker of Bullsh!t.
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This user is a native speaker of English.
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Yah meeht nawt beh abble tew undersvand zis usehr behkuz zey zpeek those African clicky noises whif und estreemleh theuck akzent.
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Yah meeht nawt beh abble tew undersvand zis usehr behkuz zey zpeek American English whif und estreemleh theuck akzent.
us-A
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This user does not speak Esperanto and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all Esperanto speakers.
eo-G
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This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of 'Straylyan.
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This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of Canadian.
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This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of Español.
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This user speaks 1337 at a near-native level.
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Sharkbait1986 is a pseudonym attributed currently to a real, breathing person who has no life.

Origin[edit]

Sharkbait1986 first adopted the nickname sharkbait when his college friends addicted him to the "Halo" videogames. In his first engagements in system link play, when he was still known as "Default", he was repeatedly and relentlessly slaughtered by his more experienced and knowledgeable friends. In the following series of nocturnal engagements, he adopted the screen name "Bait" and his now signature emblem of a red bulleye superimposed over a diagonal quadrant orange and grey background. Over time, Bait changed his name to sharkbait, which was simplified in April of 2006 to "shRkb8". Around the same time, shRkb8, an avid web surfer, got bored and decided to get AOL Triton. The screenname Sharkbait was already in use, as were several iterations of it (sharkbait01, sharkbait02, Sharkbait86, shRkb8,...). Desiring to create an easy to remember username, Sharkbait added 1986 to his Halo name, because in 1986, He witnessed the release of two humpback whales into San Francisco bay that were immediately abducted by a green, levitating spaceship which then disappeared.


Online Activity[edit]

Sharkbait1986 currently invests in the Spock Market and often contributes to chats on the Spock Market, Mythbusters, Uncyclopedia, Facebook, the Spock Market, Myspace, Centerplace.org, and the Spock Market.

Spock Market[edit]

Sharkbait1986 first logged on to the Spock Market during a Saturday in the middle of April, 2006. Sharkbait decided the next day to create a second name with the nickname nx03, but this name soon changed to USS_Atlantis, after the sister ship of the NX-01 Enterprise and NX-02 Columbia. Unfortunately, the next day, the first part of the original series Star Trek episode "The Menagerie" aired, and the sudden appearance of an emotional Spock, tacky, old-fashioned uniforms, and a woman in an authority position caused investors to panic and the Spock Market crashed in an event now known as Black Monday. In the aftermath of this event, a period referred to as "The Post-Emo Horror", Sharkbait1986's most used phrase was "KAAAAAHN!", until a fellow chatter corrected his spelling. Sharkbait1986 soon gathered himself and proclaimed himself "Emperor Sharkbait The First of The Terran Empire" and enforced his rule by making USS_Atlantis his flagship and changing it's name to ISS_Atlantis. Mysteriously and even somewhat perplexingly, ISS_Atlantis has been far more successful in the Spock Market than the original counterpart sharkbait1986. Sharkbait1986 is fond of using British and other archaic terms in chats, especially "twit".

Alt[edit]

Go kiss a duck. Seriously. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. Star Trekkin', across the universe, on the Starship Enterprise, under Captain Kirk. Star Trekkin', across the universe, boldly going forward, 'cause we can't find reverse. Lt. Uhura, report! There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Jim. Analysis, Mr. Spock! It's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it. It's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Captain. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Jim. Star Trekkin', across the universe, On the Starship Enterprise, under Captain Kirk. Star Trekkin', across the universe, Boldly going forward, still can't find reverse. Medical update, Doctor McCoy. It's worse than that, he's dead, Jim. Dead, Jim. Dead, Jim. It's worse than that, he's dead, Jim. Dead, Jim, Dead. It's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it. It's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Captain. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Jim! Starship Captain, James T. Kirk. Ah! We come in peace, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, shoot to kill. We come in peace, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, men. It's worse than that, he's dead, Jim. Dead, Jim. Dead, Jim. It's worse than that, he's dead, Jim. Dead, Jim, Dead. Well, it's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it. It's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Captain. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, scrape them off, Jim! Star Trekkin', across the universe, On the Starship Enterprise, under Captain Kirk! Star Trekkin', across the universe, Boldly going forward, and things are getting worse! Engine Room, Mister Scott. Ye canna change the laws of physics, laws of physics, laws of physics! Ye canna change the laws of physics, laws of physics, Jim. Ah, we come in peace, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, shoot to kill! We come in peace, shoot to kill, Scotty, beam me up! It's worse than that, he's dead, Jim! Dead, Jim! Dead, Jim! It's worse than that, he's dead, Jim! Dead, Jim, Dead! Well, it's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it. It's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Captain. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow. There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Jim! Ye canna change the script, Jim! Up ta you, Jimmy! It's worse than that, it's physics, Jim! Bridge to engine room, warp factor nine! Ach! If I give 'er any more she'll blow, Captain! <<boom>> Star Trekkin', across the universe, on the Starship Enterprise, under Captain Kirk! Star Trekkin', across the universe, boldly going forward, 'cause we can't find reverse! Star Trekkin', across the universe, on the Starship Enterprise, under Captain Kirk! Star Trekkin', across the universe, boldly going forward, still can't find reverse!

Uncyclopedia Activity[edit]

Sharkbait1986 currently is most active in the anniversaries section of the website, where he seeks to warm up his talents in hopes of some day writing full articles that don't suck and are actually kind of funny, in an off-kilter kind of way. --Sharkbait1986 19:33, 9 July 2006 (UTC)

I have taken a step forward and made my first contribution to UnNews. It's the story about pirates. --Sharkbait1986 00:29, 25 July 2006 (UTC)


Articles[edit]

Finished[edit]

mindless drivel, pointless drivel

In the Works[edit]

User: Sharkbait1986/Subpage Streets of SimCity Chatroom windows_2010/Flight Crash Simulator Star Trek XXV: Picard Meets The Flintstones American Grafitti

Waiting to Enter This Dimension[edit]

Discovery, Greenwich Village, Jackson Pollock

Images[edit]

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Steve "The Crocodile Hunter" Irwin (1962-2006)

We salute you!
Australia zoo splash 131.jpg


Bullet2.jpg
D3koy aimed this at your head but missed and hit this page instead.

Harold Edgerton is the man....(photographer)-D3koy

Please let me know if you use any of these images:

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USS Enterprise (CVN-65)
Van Gogh's infamous work of pointless drivel, which eventually led to his suicide and the birth of the Pointless Drivel Suicide Art Movement.
Keep Right, er...left. No, Right. Aww, heck do what you want. You're gonna die eventually anyhow.
absolutely nothing
mispelled no entry sign
yoda with a lightsaber. DUH!
Painting with Vincent Van Gogh's name incorporated. According to article pointless drivel, upon completing this work, vincent Van Gogh became suicidal.
broken motor tool. Not Technically my pic, so do whatever you want with it. Have a field day. make love to it. just don't tell me about it if you do.