Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/Archives/241

The UnSignpost

Now With 0 Trans Fat!

January 28, 2026 • Issue #241 • The Newspaper That Replaces Analysis With Flashy Graphics!

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Current issue • Archives • Press Room

Viva la revolution

By Fish on skates

Gergdown has unleashed an "Agenda 2026" that aims to make Uncyclopedia great again, one edit at a time. This plan has quite a few people onboard already, probably because people will join anything advertised in a big fancy box.

Teh Epik Duck unbanned, retires

By Soviet, Turb0-Sunrise, and Fish on skates

"Newcomer" and Wikipedia sock puppeteer has finally gotten unbanned after socking and vandalism. Three months ago, Teh Epik Duck consistently vandalised talk pages, forums and encyclopedic articles before being banned by Alula for being a dick.

In an attempt to bypass his ban, Teh Epik Duck told Alula

“Unblock me now you retard.”

– Teh Epik Duck

clearly showing this was his masterstroke. He resorted to socking but was quickly banned for an extended period of three months.

However, Duck requested his userpage and subpages be deleted as he has retired. Miss him, miss him.

Last chance to vote!

By Fish on skates, who hasn't yet voted on the top 10

Time's running out to vote for the xOTY awards and the top 10 articles of 2025! So what are you waiting for? Get your LaziBum to the polls and be opinionated!

Biopic

It was L10nM4st3r's birthday on the 25th. He's the guy that made the original a story built one word at a time, a cat-loving bot, the word "tytpo", and everyone's favorite page-blanking recent-changes-flooding userscript. Here's to another year of mastering lions, or lioning masters, I'm not sure.

Ask Turb0

• Do you drive a Saab 900? — Gammakid999
• what the fuck is that

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• opinions on said Saab 900? — Fish on skates
• see above

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• have you attended Harvard? I'm working on a conspiracy theory and need to know. Also do you like burger king? — Gammakid999
• i attended fenway park

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• do you even intend to answer any of these questions? — alula
• yes and no at the same time

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• What is your home address? (I need it for the theory) — Gammakid999
• take your mother's. don't change anything about it.

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• What operating system do you use? — Soviet
• one that's better than gerg's

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• Do you edit at school/work? — Soviet
• yes

From The Logs

• 01:52, 26 January 2026 DaniPine3 blocked Fish on skates with an expiration time of 1 minute and 40 seconds (account creation disabled, autoblock disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (suggesting that I, an ADMIN, should get banned. this is clearly conspiracy against the [totally non-existent] cabal!!!)

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• 02:18, 26 January 2026 DaniPine3 blocked Fish on skates with an expiration time of 1 minute and 41 seconds (account creation disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (idea of Turb0-Sunrise (plus, you edit conflicted on my own talkpage!!!!))

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• 00:32, 28 January 2026 DaniPine3 huffed page Your Article Name (wtf is this: content was: " == The Bee Movie Script == {{", and the only contributor was "Soviet's Bot")

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Top VFH Competitors

• 12 year olds invading the Internet (2/0)
• You (5/0)
• Kirkification (5.5/0)

VFH Highlight Of The Week

• Rob Gronkowski (13/0)

From The Forums

• LPTEW good as new
• OPOSSUM, I remember-- *gets shot*
• Gergdown is Walbro confirmed
• A years-old event might come back

Quote(s) of the Week

“OH BOB SAGET!!! SHIT. SHIIIT. GOD DAMN IT!!!”

– GlitchyZorua

“I BLEED CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA! OH CANADA!”

– Gergdown

Notes