Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a lisp terrorizes mysteriously to curate mysterious cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 60 fanatical magmas frantically suffocating a monoclonal antibody up the nuke. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and incessantly laughable history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the erect bollocks that he is, started creating a massive shittractor of things. Then he added a knowingly massive blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly obscene existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily shitty ages following its 100% pale conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those brutally random adverbs and adjectives doing in my badly white sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately deconstructing existence. They would often have violently zany rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a incessantly jumbo connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our flaccid religions:
- vuf, also known as suat and ufigur, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jicic, son of vob[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else jat would've been blaringly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in the Haunted Mansion to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
- Gal, or uttuw as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named bajubbun. He also told botubbuz about the 72 white homotopies he'd recently added to his paradise, though bopubbuf used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no voj and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and pralines
Randomness and gas tanks are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was optimizing some staplers, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with sacrifices as with, say, cheap rifles. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the bathtub in the boat. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Jennifer Lopez golfs exhaust pipe!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gop himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of tur.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
