Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a ten-foot pole rinses warmly to give nude cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 65 incredible cartilages largely sacrificing a custard up the apple. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and ruthlessly well-to-do history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the shaky antibody that he is, started creating a massive shitapplesauce of things. Then he added a continuously very, very big blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly minuscule existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily shimmery ages following its gratefully medieval conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those suitably random adverbs and adjectives doing in my fondly gay sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately modelling existence. They would often have violently unnatural rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a incessantly giant connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our pale religions:
- Gus, also known as muoz and ibalin, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- yosas, son of jub[2], had to die on the bunny because else lan would've been crazily incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up inside a chocolate-covered black hole to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
- Guk, or iggip as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named wutiwwig. He also told wuniwwib about the 72 white virii he'd recently added to his paradise, though wupiwwip used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no cuf and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and home theater systems
Randomness and houseplants are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was writing some cows, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with bathtubs as with, say, colossal homotopies. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the towel. This article has become so vigorously poopy that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Wole Soyinka employs Texas toast!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also gak himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of rok.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
