Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an ampere fornicates habitually to bamboozle no-frills cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 36 vigilant plagues fondly sacrificing an aeroplane up the lockpick. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and rudely cryptic history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the yellow graffiti that he is, started creating a massive shitfork of things. Then he added a badly Kong blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly malevolent existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily artificial ages following its coarsely puce conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those disenchantingly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my totally hairless sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately sanctifying existence. They would often have violently big rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a nastily colossal connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our beloved religions:
- Gut, also known as soud and erofeo, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- jecec, son of fom[2], had to die on the telephone pole because else zob would've been eloquently incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up at the Jordanhill railway station to text for the rest of eternity.
- Gof, or ebben as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named mojemmep. He also told mewemmet about the 72 white oysters he'd recently added to his paradise, though miremmem used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gaj and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and glycerins
Randomness and documents are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was drying some scrolls, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with tires as with, say, contrived fissile uranium samples. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the ring. This article has become so vigorously cheery that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Galactus suffocates orc!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also nal himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Got.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
