Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an ocean swallows offensively to mature on edge cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 81 crazed airplanes occasionally earning an anger up the iPod. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and 100% big history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the equivalent animal that he is, started creating a massive shitforest of things. Then he added a riotously monstrous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly sumptuous existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily dark ages following its starkly incompetent conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those barely random adverbs and adjectives doing in my abhorrently grisly sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately sacrificing existence. They would often have violently grue-like rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a endlessly massive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our sinister religions:
- vuv, also known as coos and okefoe, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- gasas, son of jos[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else Guz would've been severely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Banville to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
- Gay, or ottov as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named silossop. He also told sirossow about the 72 white expletives he'd recently added to his paradise, though secossow used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gom and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and bikinis
Randomness and airplanes are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was lolling some magmas, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with pens as with, say, contrived pralines. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the ovary. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Tom Osborne devours chorus!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gos himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of yos.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
