Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an administrator orates coldly to curate artificial cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 12 common fissile uranium samples seldom navigating a street sign up the cigarette. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and offensively barbarous history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the rapturous stormcloud that he is, started creating a massive shitblow-up doll of things. Then he added a affably Kong blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly round existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily common ages following its peevishly demoralizing conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those verbosely random adverbs and adjectives doing in my neurotically ugly sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately deceiving existence. They would often have violently slimy rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a obnoxiously massive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our scanty religions:
- bot, also known as faod and ijalij, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jases, son of Gob[2], had to die on the cross because else cug would've been disturbingly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Hell to relax for the rest of eternity.
- Goj, or ibbit as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named vicivvig. He also told vedivvij about the 72 white lawn mowers he'd recently added to his paradise, though vodivvik used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no bay and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and jellybeans
Randomness and encyclopediae are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was washing some blenders, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with airplanes as with, say, intransigent encyclopediae. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the electrified mocha chinchilla in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Maria Skłodowska-Curie vomits milquetoast!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gus himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of goy.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
