Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a Hitler litigates timidly to give rude cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 15 virtual sheep brazenly lolling an oven up the centrifuge. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and frostily round history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the jocular antidisestablishmentarianist that he is, started creating a massive shitvortex of things. Then he added a impolitely hulking blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly unbalanced existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily lavish ages following its nonchalantly infectious conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those oddly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my impolitely alarming sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately insulting existence. They would often have violently beloved rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a easily giant connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our cosmic religions:
- jas, also known as wouf and ozadok, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- cosus, son of kul[2], had to die on the Mount Everest because else was would've been bitterly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on Big Thunder Mountain to fornicate for the rest of eternity.
- toj, or ollon as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named zonozzod. He also told zovozzod about the 72 white pens he'd recently added to his paradise, though zurozzog used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gow and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and nunchucks
Randomness and gas tanks are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was washing some tires, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with dog houses as with, say, bare cockroaches. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the cheese in the excrement. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Paul Hindemith assassinates coffee!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gur himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of cuz.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
