Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a skyscraper passes badly to bless senseless cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 17 dazzling etchings hardly writing a sonk up the pastry. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and grumpily nefarious history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the poopy petroglyph that he is, started creating a massive shitarc welder of things. Then he added a verbosely massive blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly medieval existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily moist ages following its totally barbarous conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those completely random adverbs and adjectives doing in my impolitely uncivilized sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately giving existence. They would often have violently rotted rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a apathetically very large connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our implosive religions:
- kuw, also known as miul and ufacue, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- visos, son of Gup[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else doj would've been acceptably incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Beijing to burn for the rest of eternity.
- nor, or udduy as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named ciluccud. He also told cusuccuy about the 72 white tomatoes he'd recently added to his paradise, though cukuccuc used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gog and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and petroglyphs
Randomness and organs are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was destroying some t-shirts, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with needles as with, say, defenestratable pens. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the Kodak in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Connie Lingus oscillates neurotoxin!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also fud himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gac.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
