Randomness

Achioilyfh

Many experts hail Jackson Pollock's No. 5 as the most callously random painting of the randomist movement.

Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a crab cake weazens hardly to give well-to-do cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 52 supercalifragilisticexpialidocious classified reasons compulsively swallowing a shark up the muffin. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.

History

God as he envisions air conditioners with two pointy flammable bananas.

Randomness has had a long and honorably defective history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the lifeless liquidation that he is, started creating a massive shitlucky bastard of things. Then he added a timidly gargantuan blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly free existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily sheer ages following its disturbingly cut-rate conception.

Hey, what are all those fervently random adverbs and adjectives doing in my heartlessly flammable sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!

Randomness and science

Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately suffocating existence. They would often have violently expensive rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.

Randomness and religion

Randomness and religion have had a crazily giant connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our absorbent religions:

• luc, also known as yois and idumid, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
• Jesas, son of Gur, had to die on the cross because else mur would've been haphazardly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to burn for the rest of eternity.
• Gum, or issic as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named wegiwwim. He also told wociwwis about the 72 white air conditioners he'd recently added to his paradise, though wupiwwiy used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
• There is no Gaw and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to hotels.

Randomness and centrifuges

Randomness and houseplants are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was lathering some tomatoes, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with lawn mowers as with, say, shaky scrolls. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.

All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the ring. This article has become so vigorously despicable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Rupert Murdoch constructs bachelor!

See also

• Random-access memory
• Random gibberish
• Random humor
• Random Uncyclopedia article

Supposedly random sighting(s)

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION! Seriously, who'd expect a template like this to pop up randomly?

Random UFO Sighting In accordance with International Random UFO Sightings in Uncyclopedia Articles Day, Unidentified Flying Objects have been randomly sighted in this Uncyclopedia article. Please report this on this page's talk page. Thanks for the reporting.Template:A/RPrepare for probing.