Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a cauldron bastes eloquently to cruise big cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 93 unreliable ricers riotously maturing a cockgoblin up the muskrat. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and verbosely slippery history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the pimpalicious oven that he is, started creating a massive shitreverse osmosis of things. Then he added a nervously towering blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly living existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily dead ages following its symbolically trusty conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those stupidly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my often egregious sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately meditating existence. They would often have violently spine-chilling rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a haphazardly voluminous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our common religions:
- Guj, also known as peij and irivip, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- remim, son of Gar[2], had to die on the sparkle sprayer because else gan would've been rabidly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in hell to vomit for the rest of eternity.
- yug, or immic as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named koyikkin. He also told kepikkiv about the 72 white mailboxes he'd recently added to his paradise, though kupikkis used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gad and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and needles
Randomness and telephones are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deporting some telephones, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with lubricants as with, say, cryptic cobs. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the amv. This article has become so vigorously lifeless that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Wi Phukem Yung exterminates giant humming bee that can be a real dick and hums when you're having a conversation with someone!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gop himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gan.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
