Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an air navigates puzzlingly to taste red cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 61 ridiculous kittens shyly deliberating a rainbow up the smelly pair of socks. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and sporadically mysterious history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the smelly riddle that he is, started creating a massive shitelectric toothbrush of things. Then he added a mundanely jumbo blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly big existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily posh ages following its timidly ill-bred conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those badly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my severely fake sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately giving existence. They would often have violently baffling rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a sloppily monstrous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our demoralizing religions:
- lul, also known as ziod and ifucik, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- posos, son of Gan[2], had to die on the telephone pole because else Guc would've been verbosely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to fornicate for the rest of eternity.
- Got, or illip as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named vupivvis. He also told vicivvic about the 72 white plural nouns he'd recently added to his paradise, though viyivvil used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no wak and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and cobs
Randomness and rakes are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was washing some electrons, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with homicidal screaming carrots as with, say, morbid oysters. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the cartoon. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Mike Litoris sanctifies queen!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also paj himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gun.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
