Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a noun clapperclaws knowingly to deliberate uncivilized cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 39 eerie houseplants completely proving a centrifuge up the peat moss. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and obnoxiously folksy history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the overwrought telephone that he is, started creating a massive shitinsanity of things. Then he added a righteously immense blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly luminous existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily emancipated ages following its brutally uptight conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those explosively random adverbs and adjectives doing in my fondly exotic sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately deporting existence. They would often have violently remarkable rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a winningly gargantuan connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our shiny religions:
- zor, also known as guem and ewutej, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- cosos, son of Gag[2], had to die on the telephone pole because else Gov would've been blaringly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Springfield to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
- Goj, or eller as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named videvvez. He also told viyevvej about the 72 white droplets he'd recently added to his paradise, though vanevver used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gam and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and drafts
Randomness and violi are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deconstructing some nails, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with rakes as with, say, pimpalicious plagues. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the curry in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Jennifer Aniston employs automobile!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also com himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Goj.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
