Randomness

Oiclheihue

Many experts hail Jackson Pollock's No. 5 as the most not very random painting of the randomist movement.

Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a brickbat optimizes virtually to recollect red cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 53 common bananas merely navigating a dead flounder up the beans. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.

History

God as he deters mailboxes with two pointy flammable bananas.

Randomness has had a long and uncaringly nude history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the hairy bishop that he is, started creating a massive shitanything of things. Then he added a endlessly gigantic blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly scanty existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily senseless ages following its rarely boring conception.

Hey, what are all those chaotically random adverbs and adjectives doing in my callously beloved sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!

Randomness and science

Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately raping existence. They would often have violently contagious rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.

Randomness and religion

Randomness and religion have had a noisily humongous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our erudite religions:

• God, also known as keob and unofue, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
• Jesus, son of kug, had to die on the cross because else nac would've been narcissistically incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in hell to starve for the rest of eternity.
• Gup, or uttul as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named kezukkug. He also told kitukkuz about the 72 white neurotoxins he'd recently added to his paradise, though kocukkul used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
• There is no Guf and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to encyclopediae.

Randomness and bathtubs

Randomness and organs are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was lolling some sacrifices, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with telephones as with, say, spine-chilling t-shirts. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.

All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Meg Griffin dances warning template!

See also

• Random-access memory
• Random gibberish
• Random humor
• Random Uncyclopedia article

Supposedly random sighting(s)

Random Elvis Sighting In accordance to the August 20th celebration of International Random Elvis Sighting in Uncyclopedia Articles Day, Elvis has been randomly sighted in this Uncyclopedia article. Please report this on this page's talk page. Thanks for the reporting.Template:A/RThe King has left the building.

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION! Seriously, who'd expect a template like this to pop up randomly?

Random Big Foot Sighting In accordance with International Random Big Foot Sightings in Uncyclopedia Articles Day, Big Foot has been randomly sighted in this Uncyclopedia article. Please report this on this page's talk page. Thanks for the reporting.

Random UFO Sighting In accordance with International Random UFO Sightings in Uncyclopedia Articles Day, Unidentified Flying Objects have been randomly sighted in this Uncyclopedia article. Please report this on this page's talk page. Thanks for the reporting. Prepare for probing.