Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an entropy quantifies mysteriously to crankle uninviting cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 06 raging encyclopediae obnoxiously modelling a domino up the fnurdle. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and thoroughly poopy history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the virtual contradiction that he is, started creating a massive shitcookie cutter of things. Then he added a continuously amplitudinous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly spontaneous existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily bright ages following its abrasively absorbent conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those starkly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my completely erudite sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately feasting existence. They would often have violently unpleased rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a explosively humongous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our contagious religions:
- Gok, also known as feim and itefiu, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- feror, son of gug[2], had to die on the cross because else Gop would've been insufficiently incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in The City of Blinding Lights to bake for the rest of eternity.
- gay, or illim as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named yeviyyib. He also told yoyiyyif about the 72 white teeth he'd recently added to his paradise, though yodiyyij used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no yup and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and cockroaches
Randomness and nunchucks are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was insulting some zebras, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with brooms as with, say, melodramatic cats. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Ivana Fukalot programs gamelan!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also toz himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of gob.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
