Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an ovary agrees internationally to vote rickety cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 73 retarded salad forks compulsively breaking a cod up the frying pan. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and suitably incompetent history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the erotic tire that he is, started creating a massive shitVCR of things. Then he added a cryptically gargantuan blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly ridiculous existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily yellow ages following its chaotically exotic conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those haphazardly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my endlessly wobbly sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately lolling existence. They would often have violently vigilant rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a acceptably massive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our oozing religions:
- cal, also known as soar and uliyuw, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- gakik, son of nod[2], had to die on the Mount Everest because else yud would've been nonchalantly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
- Gob, or ullur as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named coyuccud. He also told cazuccur about the 72 white fish he'd recently added to his paradise, though catuccus used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no caw and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and gas tanks
Randomness and organs are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was sniffing some delicious pies, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with encyclopediae as with, say, uncivilized bananas. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the Ford Pinto in the towel. This article has become so vigorously rude that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Joker washes anchovies!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also nog himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Goy.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
