Randomness

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Many experts hail Jackson Pollock's No. 5 as the most abhorrently random painting of the randomist movement.

Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a dictator feels quickly to crystallize rude cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 80 erect white boys narcissistically mystifying an anger up the tofu. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.

History

God as he cuddles pillows with two pointy flammable bananas.

Randomness has had a long and easily hopeless history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the nude dishrag that he is, started creating a massive shitgyroscope of things. Then he added a nearly humongous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly fervent existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily shiny ages following its suitably spontaneous conception.

Hey, what are all those riotously random adverbs and adjectives doing in my heartlessly pale sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!

Randomness and science

Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately ablating existence. They would often have violently clammy rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.

Randomness and religion

Randomness and religion have had a clearly hulking connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our grue-like religions:

• Gar, also known as kaob and esagel, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
• Jemom, son of Gum, had to die on the Mount Everest because else cap would've been rapidly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to relax for the rest of eternity.
• Gok, or emmek as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named sofessev. He also told sesesset about the 72 white face masks he'd recently added to his paradise, though suressev used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
• There is no duf and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to cartilages.

Randomness and cakes

Randomness and hot dogs are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was navigating some face masks, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with glycerins as with, say, shimmery tanks. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.

All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the ring. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Anita P. deteriorates featherbed!

See also

• Random-access memory
• Random gibberish
• Random humor
• Random Uncyclopedia article

Supposedly random sighting(s)

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Random Loch Ness Monster Sighting In accordance with International Random Loch Ness Monster Sightings in Uncyclopedia Articles Day, the Loch Ness monster has been randomly sighted in this Uncyclopedia article. Please report this on this page's talk page. Thanks for the reporting. Time to get a new camera.