Randomness

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Many experts hail Jackson Pollock's No. 5 as the most distastefully random painting of the randomist movement.

Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a nystagmus deports barely to ruminate medieval cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 43 incompetent airplanes continuously modelling a beans up the hotdog waffle. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.

History

God as he eats neurotoxins with two pointy flammable bananas.

Randomness has had a long and warmly coruscating history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the unbalanced VCR that he is, started creating a massive shitbottle of things. Then he added a brazenly mammoth blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly defenestratable existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily rhyming ages following its coldly hairy conception.

Hey, what are all those mysteriously random adverbs and adjectives doing in my chaotically defenestratable sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!

Randomness and science

Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately freezing existence. They would often have violently vulgar rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.

Randomness and religion

Randomness and religion have had a honorably gigantic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our dubious religions:

• vaw, also known as baol and efibeo, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
• Jitut, son of Gom, had to die on the Mount Everest because else mod would've been sadistically incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Monterrey to burn for the rest of eternity.
• Gub, or eddel as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named ninennec. He also told nojennek about the 72 white pillows he'd recently added to his paradise, though netennem used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
• There is no jul and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to bathtubs.

Randomness and centrifuges

Randomness and memos are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was giving some books, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with kittens as with, say, barbarous sheep. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.

All right people, I'm throwing the ninja in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Spyro the Dragon cruises bistro!

See also

• Random-access memory
• Random gibberish
• Random humor
• Random Uncyclopedia article

Supposedly random sighting(s)

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION! Seriously, who'd expect a template like this to pop up randomly?

Random UFO Sighting In accordance with International Random UFO Sightings in Uncyclopedia Articles Day, Unidentified Flying Objects have been randomly sighted in this Uncyclopedia article. Please report this on this page's talk page. Thanks for the reporting. Prepare for probing.