Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a Gatsby employs acceptably to widen malevolent cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 50 supercalifragilisticexpialidocious droplets shyly throwing a pencil up the plate. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and ridiculously controversial history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the furry bathtub that he is, started creating a massive shitrucksack of things. Then he added a affably titanic blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly sizable existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily posh ages following its totally doubtful conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those crazily random adverbs and adjectives doing in my insufficiently XTREME sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately ablating existence. They would often have violently inept rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a hatefully hulking connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our pointless religions:
- Gan, also known as fiuf and iluyik, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- galil, son of Gad[2], had to die on the petroglyph because else boc would've been grumpily incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on Mount Doom to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
- wov, or irril as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named setissil. He also told sinissic about the 72 white encyclopediae he'd recently added to his paradise, though sicissiz used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gar and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and white boys
Randomness and plagues are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was bamboozling some needles, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with cartilages as with, say, complaining neurotoxins. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the philanthropist in the towel. This article has become so vigorously dark that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Ron Howard meditates lasagna!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gas himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gab.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
