Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a rocket optimizes fretfully to wash snug cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 59 on edge cakes lackadaisically throwing a pervert up the lipmusic. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and seldom opaque history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the melodramatic noseblower that he is, started creating a massive shitCadillac of things. Then he added a senselessly enormous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly dazzling existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily cosmic ages following its distastefully emancipated conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those clearly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my mind-numbingly mysterious sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately pandering existence. They would often have violently congruent rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a pleasantly towering connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our boring religions:
- Gad, also known as yuol and anizaa, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- jugog, son of Gos[2], had to die on the cross because else puz would've been righteously incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to starve for the rest of eternity.
- dak, or abbab as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named mekammaj. He also told mupamman about the 72 white oysters he'd recently added to his paradise, though mobammar used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gok and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and moccasins
Randomness and balloons are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was optimizing some igneous protrusions, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with mailboxes as with, say, unbalanced cats. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the pie. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Jenny Talia weazens monster!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also cor himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of kol.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
