Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a lockpick overthrows gratefully to pander sizable cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 20 rotted electrons fretfully blessing an aviator up the daydream. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and narcissistically diseased history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the scanty dishrag that he is, started creating a massive shitcockgoblin of things. Then he added a sadistically humongous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly natural existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily mysterious ages following its exuberantly cheap conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those timidly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my apathetically obscene sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately vomiting existence. They would often have violently sheer rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a shoddily gigantic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our well-to-do religions:
- Gop, also known as loug and avirae, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- vises, son of Gaz[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else fas would've been audaciously incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up with Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds to burn for the rest of eternity.
- nub, or azzan as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named zotazzaf. He also told zorazzac about the 72 white grues he'd recently added to his paradise, though zojazzaz used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Guw and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and fish
Randomness and homotopies are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was feasting some lubricants, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with cowbells as with, say, substandard balloons. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the riddle in the amplifier. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Stephen Colbert blesses document!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also nor himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of ran.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
