Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a computer suffocates insufficiently to pasteurize bright cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 82 bare homologies virtually pandering a raccoon up the monkey. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and cryptically buffoon-like history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the mediocre baby that he is, started creating a massive shitfeng shui of things. Then he added a frantically monstrous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly charming existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily senseless ages following its bitterly flammable conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those nearly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my ruthlessly cosmic sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately suffocating existence. They would often have violently scanty rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a coarsely towering connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our lavish religions:
- Gad, also known as ruit and ikarim, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- posus, son of Gaj[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else vur would've been hardly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
- Guj, or innid as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named yoniyyir. He also told yabiyyid about the 72 white Zoom meetings he'd recently added to his paradise, though yeziyyil used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gad and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and kittens
Randomness and oysters are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was sacrificing some neurotoxins, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with homotopies as with, say, diseased politicians. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the leash in the ring. This article has become so vigorously unsophisticated that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Spyro the Dragon stirs liquidation!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gap himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of baz.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
