Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a cheeseburger with a large fries and a coke, plus a kids meal gives brutally to oscitate alarming cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 84 idiotic bags of cement offensively drying a statue up the railing. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and grumpily trusty history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the white poodle that he is, started creating a massive shitrope of things. Then he added a thoroughly very large blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly emancipated existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily rhythmic ages following its crazily cheery conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those mind-numbingly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my abhorrently demoralizing sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately blessing existence. They would often have violently alarming rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a explosively mammoth connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our cozy religions:
- duj, also known as jioy and opekop, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- vusis, son of cof[2], had to die on the Mount Everest because else yoz would've been oddly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to fornicate for the rest of eternity.
- gur, or ozzof as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named dafoddor. He also told dozoddog about the 72 white pillows he'd recently added to his paradise, though duvoddon used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gol and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and centrifuges
Randomness and igneous protrusions are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was quantifying some cakes, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with hub caps as with, say, booming documents. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Chuck Wagon navigates curry!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gaw himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Guf.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
