Portal:Games

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The Games and Sports Portal

Hey, gimme a go.

Going back thousands of years through the anals of time, man's penchant for sport (pronounced spurt) is limitless and bounding. Competition has both raised the blood to passionate fervency and reconfirmed the eternal greatness of mankind throughout the centuries. Among the first sports was rungold, which consisted of one man standing at the top of a hill next to a huge boulder, and another man one hundred paces down. The first man would push the massive rock down the hill, and the object was that the second man had to "return it."

Another early sport was Sokur, an archaic game in which players would kick a round object with their feet with the object being to get the ball into either of two makeshift structures called "nets" (usually made out of tungsten weed, or spiderwebs). This game quickly fell out of favor when it was discovered that the object could be picked up with the hands, eventually leading to modern-day Rugby.

Modern sports include Real Football, Baseball, Kitten Huffing, Curling, Snooking, Sockey, Kitten Hurling, Chucking loads of Elephant Poo at each other, Sailing and Monkey Waxing. Every 5 years the Olympiad is played in these and three other grand sports. It is an international competition open to all nations, which originated with the Geeks, an ancient civilization of people with thick glasses and a penchant for VRML tags. People have been throwin' the pigskin, hurlin stones, and waxing monkeys for decades with no stop in sight. This event is ultra-telecast on multilive video feeds on a number of stations worldwide. The soft drink revenues from the event are in the billions, but hey you don't need to know that, you're too busy watchin koko get a clean wax job. (Full article...)


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Fun for the whole family.

The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game is one of Czechoslovakia's favorite American pastimes. In fact, it's Czechoslovakia's only American pastime, this is, however, completely irrelevant. The object of the game is quite simple, you must Keep Your Finger In The Box for as long as possible, or until your opponent removes his/her finger. You can do whatever else you want during this time, but your finger must remain in the box at all times. The first one to remove their finger from the box loses, and is from then on referred to as a loser for the rest of their Keep Your Finger In The Box Game career.

Directions

The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game sounds simple, but in reality, it's one of the most complex games still being played today.

  1. Before starting the game, make sure you have what you need (e.g., box, a bottle to pee in). (Full article...)
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Things You Can Do

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Thermopylae

Thermopylae was the top selling board game of the 5th Century BCE.

Nominate stuff Image credit: Mhaille Image archive


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Did You Know...

  • ...Cup Stacking is a fringe pseudo-sport championed by young white children all across the Midwestern United States (where real sports have been declared the Olympics of Satan and thus outlawed).
  • ...The Cardboard Box is the latest advancement in the field of tactical military equipment.
  • ...Uncyclopedia:Uncyclo-tan is hawt. That fact doesn't really have anything to do with games, but I just thought I'd mention it.
  • ...The Lost Vikings are a group of sports newscasters who were once under the employment of Blizzard Sports News. Consisting of Erik "The Swift" Ronnson, Olaf "The Stout" Starke, and Baleog "The Fierce" Gundersenn, the three worked together effectively to bring the world amusing coverage of many sports topics.
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Recognized Articles

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Categories

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Board Games - Cards - Computer Games - Departure of Fun - Drinking Games - Fighting Games - GameFAQs - Games for Mac OS - Grand Theft Auto - MMORPGs - Mortal Kombat - PacMan - Puzzles - Role playing games - RuneScape - Sports - Uncyclopedia Games - Uncyclopoly - Video games - Vile racism - War Games - World of Warcraft - Xbox Live Members

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