User talk:Gnerry

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The Balloon welcomes you!

Hello, Gnerry, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thanks for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left...Not that far, goddammit! ...Yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

• Beginner's Guide
• How to be funny and not just stupid

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links, particularly the second one. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia, or need more help with something, try these:

• The help pages
• The FAQs
• The vanity policies
• Getting started

If you feel like asking someone for help, feel free to ask me on my talk page, in the help forums, or on the Uncyclopedia IRC channel. With the forums and the IRC, keep in mind that the first response of the community is almost always general silliness. We are after all, a silly wiki, run by numerous silly, silly people. When you edit discussion pages, though, make sure you sign your name, using four tildes (~~~~) or the "sign" button (), above the edit box. This'll automatically produce your name and the date, and lets everyone know who the hell you are. Signing will also help you avoid the {{tilde}} template.

When you write articles, make sure you start with enough on the page so that it's not deletion-quality. If you must create a stub that you plan to expand on in the near future, use a {{WIP}} or {{Construction}} tag to mark it as a work-in-progress. However, if you leave a tagged WIP unedited for a full week, it'll wind up huffed. If the idea of impending deletion doesn't appeal to you, you should like I do, and start pages in userspace, first. This means making a page like User:Gnerry/Article about stuff. In userspace just about anything goes(save for the obvious no-nos, like shock pics or other stupidity), and you can build and rework your page(s) at your leisure. Once it's done, just move into mainspace, maybe getting a pee review at some point to get constructive feedback on your article.

For new users seeking help, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Browse our list of available mentors, and leave them a message on their talk page.

Lastly, and most importantly, have fun with it! As a comedy wiki, that's kinda what Uncyc is for. Enjoy yourself, and remember to never take anything anyone here says too seriously. We have serious moments, but generally we stay pretty laid back. Also, I'm not a bot. Just 'cause you saw a similar message on a bunch of other users' pages doesn't mean I didn't have to copy and paste this one onto yours with my own meatsack of a finger. Anyways, welcome to the machine! - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 19:12, Jul 2

Attention Colonizers!

The brief era of peace we've been enjoying has once again been shattered by the IP horde. And since those pot smoking, tree hugging liberal faggots repealed the draft the IC forces are stuck with the likes of you. You are therefore ordered to report to the front lines at once for briefing. Once we have decided our plan of attack, we'll march into battle post haste. You're dismissed Gnerry. -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:31, 11 Sep

Okay, you mangy colonists.

I've been commissioned by Mooshy to rerererevitalize IC. I'm to be the glorious leader, etc. because Sissy, Gerry, and Opty have all fucked off. So, I have a few general ideas to start with on what to do. First of all, no fucking infighting. What's said by the authority figures goes. This is Imperial Colonization, not Imperial United States Congress. Second, there should be more of a limit on articles for nomination. Somewhere between 5 and 10. We'll never get to all 17 that are up there if people's votes are so scattered. Third, an active recruiting drive. It fits the name. We're going to draft Satirical Soldiers to deal with the bloody natives at those shit articles on IC. This said, I still want to hear all of your opinions on what to do. Either drop me a line on my talk page, or I'm on IRC damn near all day very weekday. So lets get going, Colonizers! Where the Wild Colins Are - LET THE WILD RUMPUS START! 16:55, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

ATTENTION COLONIZER

Duty Calls! Imperial Colonization has been commandeered! With a shiny new, waterproof coat, we're heading out to sea once again. We need you for our next colonization. You have one week to nominate or vote from right now, Sunday the 31st of January 2010, to Saturday the 6th of February 2010. (See Protocol for how to nominate an article for Colonization. And remember, if you vote for an article that means you intend to help colonize it.) Then starting Sunday, 7 February 2010, we will start colonizing another savage land (i.e., improving whichever article gets the most votes). Come on board and vote or nom now, to the glory of Her Majesty!

EXTRA: Our most recent colonization, Transformers, has just been Pee Reviewed. If you're interested in making improvements, please check out the article and the review. With a little work, we may have another glorious Feature article! Wouldn't that be just spiffy? And remember, if you participate and this does get featured, you get one half feature credit!

For the Glory of Her Majesty and by Order of your Fearful Fearless Leader, King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  19:44, January 30, 2010 (UTC)

ATTENTION COLONIZERS: WE ARE RECREATING CREATIONISM

The Bible says God created the world in six days by himself--our crew of talented colonizers can surely recreate an article in a week and a half! Remember, any Colonizer is welcome to work on our current project, which is the Creationism article. But before you begin, check "READ THIS FIRST" at the top. From Sunday, 7 February to Wednesday, 10 February 2010, a hearty crew of brave colonizers plotted a strong course for the article by consensus. We have the beginning of a great colonization, so go forth and colonize to the glory of Her Majesty!

Special Note for Lobsterbacks (i.e. those who signed up but haven't yet worked on a successful colonization). We plan to keep your name on the honored membership list if you make worthwhile contribution to the article or other parts of Imperial Colonization between 31 January 2010 and the end of this project. If your name is removed from the list, you are welcome to reapply when you plan to become active. User:Why do I need to provide this?/sig10 05:25, February 11, 2010 (UTC)

UnNews:Fighter pilot breaks speed of time

Welcome to the service! I've put the dateline in the usual format (capital letters; check out UnNews:Style) and added {{Original}} for your sources, that is, to excuse you from having to have any.

Reads sort of like news; isn't based on news, but {{Original}} excuses that; interesting concept, though not so unique there isn't already a Category of them; not a knee-slapper, but a good first effort. Contribute again soon! Spıke ¬ 03:31 1-Oct-10