User:Lenoxus/Quotes

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Source: Unquotable:Quote Market.

From Frank West[edit | edit source]

“I've covered more wars than this faggot. And by covering wars, I mean having gay sex with men.”

– Oscar Wilde on Frank West

“Dead Rising? Dead men do not get erections. I know from experience. ”

– Oscar Wilde on the Male Zombies from Dead Rising

Price: Hell, we'll pay you to take them off our hands!

(I'm still waiting to be paid, of course.)

From Scooby Doo[edit | edit source]

“BOO!”

– Oscar Wilde on Scooby Doo

Price: Three dollops of ectoplasm

(Didn't hurt in the least.)

From UnBooks:Adventure gamebook[edit | edit source]

“I play super kawest.”

– Dan Quayle on Adventure Gamebooks


Price: $1.00

“I also found that all of the endings sucked, no matter which one you got to.”

– Evil Pizza on Adventure Gamebooks


Price: $5.99

“I had a lot of them when I was little. I liked to look at the pictures of macho-men in tights.”

– Oscar Wilde on Adventure Gamebooks


Price: $10.00

“WHAT?! Someone used pen! I will terminate the girly man who wrote on this gamebook in pen!”

– Arnold Schwarzenegger on Adventure Gamebooks


Price: $2.00

“In Soviet Russia, gamebook reads/plays YOU!”

– Russian Reversal on Adventure Gamebooks


Price: $5.32/$3.24

Buy them ALL and save 20% on your next Quote Market purchase!

(Total: Don't wanna think about it.)

From Paris Hilton[edit | edit source]

“Ooooh look, tequila.”

– Paris on Sex


Price: A bottle of tequila, and she's yours

Didn't really need that bottle anyway. Of course, I don't really need Hilton anyway either. Decisions!

From Microsoft Windows[edit | edit source]

“I'm so gonna roundhouse kick that f**king Windows logo”

– Chuck Norris on Microsoft Windows


Price: $300

From Soviet Russia[edit | edit source]

“In Soviet Russia, UMD pops out from YOU!!”


Price: 10 cents

“In Soviet Russia, computer wastes away its youth on YOU!”


Price: $8.75

“In Soviet Russia, genitals masturbate you!”

– Russian Reversal on Lonelyness

“In Soviet Russia, Oscar Wilde quotes YOU!”

– Russian Reversal on Oscar Wilde

From McDonalds Characters[edit | edit source]

“Where's my break today? Where's my fucking break? AAAAAAGH!”

– Birdy on not getting a break today


Price: $1.45

From Atom Bomb[edit | edit source]

“Oh how I love the Atom Bomb.”

– Chuck Norris on Chuck Norris


Price: 50 cents

From Swedish Chef[edit | edit source]

“I cun't stup eateeng thuse-a demn Svedeesh Feesh!!”

– Swedish Chef on Swedish Fish


Price: 10 krona

“Villy Vonka vas a vild visher. Vat? Vat are you-a looffing at?!”

– Swedish Chef on the letter W


Price: 25 öre

“Vat do you meen-a?! You cunt depoort me, I em a legill reseedent!”

– Swedish Chef on being deported back to Sweden


Priceless

From Jack Bauer[edit | edit source]

“I think he really doesn't know.”


Price: $3.40

“DAMNIT AUDREY!”

– Jack Bauer on Audrey


Price:$19.67

From Universal Remote Control Everything 3000[edit | edit source]

“I freeze time with them.”

– Towelhead on Universal Remote Control Everything 3000

Price: The next issue of Captain Obvious comics.

“I use it to fix my hair and to kill that annoying neighbor kid.”

– Tina Fey on Universal Remote Control Everything 3000

Price: A wet hairdryer.

From Trogdor[edit | edit source]

“Let's do lunch”

– Oscar Wilde on Trogdor

Price: a Roast Kerrek.

“Mmm... he can burninate me any day.. that's right sister!”

– Man on Man Action

Price: A burned peasant.

From Crayons[edit | edit source]

“Crayons love people.”

– Richard Simmons on Richard Simmons

$1.00

“I drew a picture of God, but I ran out of purple.”

– Bill Gates on Bill Gates

“Who needs crayons, when you have Markers?”

– Steven Hawking on Steven Hawking

“Screw this, I'm making a bomb.”

– Albert Einstein on Albert Einstein

“Crayons are cool.”

– Wu Tang Clan on Wu Tang Clan

“WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING TO MY FUCKING CRAYON?!?!”

– Samuel L. Jackson on Samuel L. Jackson

From Ayumi Hamasaki[edit | edit source]

“ Nice... ”

– Peter Weller on Ayumi Hamasaki

Price: ¥1000.00

“ DAMN, she's an hot mama! ”

– Oscar Wilde on Ayumi Hamasaki

Price: 1 Koda Kumi Album of your choice!

From Pink Floyd[edit | edit source]

“I did not have sexual relations with that song.”

– Rick Wright on that lying bitch echoes

Price:Money(But keep you hands off of my stack!)

From Chav[edit | edit source]

“In Soviet Russia, Chavs pity You!!!”

– Russian Reversal on Mr. T's comments on Chavs

From Gay marriage[edit | edit source]

“Gay marriage? Yeah, sure... That's cool. Wait... What? Dude, what are we talking about again? I was staring at boobs.”

– Oscar Wilde on Gay Marriage

Price: 3 sexual-identity contradictions

“What? Gay Marriage, tell me everything about it! No I'm not gay, how do you dare to say that! I'm just interested...”

– Orlando Bloom on Gay Marriage

Price: $2.83