User:BobNewbie/The Great Disney War

The Great Disney War
Date December 3, 2010 – Novemeber, 2018 Location USA, Korea, Canada, France, Iraq, Disneyland
Belligerents
Largest combatants United States of America Assholes and Iraq (There's a difference) Your mom Less important combatants North Korea South Korea Canada, eh?	Largest combatants Walt Disney Entire Grue Army Justin Bieber fans Micheal Jakson's Thriller Zombie Army Less important combatants Micheal Jackson (As a zombie) Mind-controlled elephants
Commanders and leaders
High commanders Barack Obama Oprah Osama bin Laden Oscar Wilde Pedobear Secondary commanders Electronic Arts	High commanders Justin Bieber George Lucas Secondary commanders Your mom Betty White
Strength
About 29, 000, 000 and a can of beer.	About 4,815,162,342
Casualties and losses
North Hemisphere 20 000 Whores 9 crushed ants South Hemisphere 255 000 Bastards with Oozi's	North Hemisphere 24, 000 Justin Bieber fans. South Hemisphere 1 Cat. SON OF A BITCH. 12,000 people who nobody cares about so its a miracle we even put it into this article. Do you care? Exactly.

“How....how can an innocent little mouse do... do that?”

~ Barack Obama, upon seeing the Eiffel Tower in flames.

“Holy shit!”

~ Avril Lavigne, upon seeing Harpo Studios fall to the ground.

“OMIGAWD THEY'RE COMING”

~ Oscar Wilde's famous remark as elephants march through Korea.

The Great Disney War, also known as The Mouse Ears Conspiracy or World Whore Disney is a massive full blown conflict that was organized by Disney.

The original plans were to take over and destroy most of the Jewish population, due to the contract expiring. Apparently, the fine print said that all Jews must kiss Mickey Mouse's ass before 2010, though this was mistook as a joke. Soon, Jews everywhere started to be attacked by Kitten Huffers, though could stand their ground for a short time.

Later, after being promised make-up, Justin Bieber joined the Disney Army. This sparked a massive new fagd, and thousands of Justin Bieber fans started to dropped out of school to join Disney in their fight for ass-lickery.

Osama bin Laden, though a avid a Justin Bieber fan, was horrified at the thought of joining the Disney army, and decided to create a contract of truce between America and Iraq. Barack Obama agreed, as he was scarred for life when a amputated Woody and the two nations united. Whorelord-General Your.M. Omma or Iraq was chosen by Barack Obama to try to gain some intelligence from Disney. As it turns out, there was basically none.

Marketing stint pulled by The Black Eyed Peas

Oprah Winfrey, George Clooney, Oscar Wilde and Pedobear were assigned to infiltrate the residence of Betty White, a Disney mastermind, and find out that she wears white panties, though find nothing of military importance. They escape almost successfully, though Betty White found and tortured George Clooney to death.

Electronic Arts joined the Jewish army, and was lead by Pedobear for the first 4 years of the war. Pedobear sent all EA's soldiers to North Dakota for a short military weapons and stealth training coarse, hours before New York was attacked by the massive Grue army, each Grue armed with a bag of Pretzels, using them to cause mass thirst among thousands of kittens, before a newly zombiefied Micheal Jackson and his division of "funky" zombies attack New York's water supplies.

Oscar Wilde sends news to Barack Obama via Twitter, notifying him that Korea has agreed to send America weapons and condoms in exchange for almost $13, 000, 000, so that they can launch the Korean Porn Network. Barack agrees. Oscar Wilde is sent to Korea to obtain the condoms and weapons, along with an elite team of EA soldiers. Upon arriving, its is revealed that Disney has enslaved thousands of Asian elephants, and they have been injected with rabies and sexual angst chemicals.

Barack Obama is mortally wounded when Tiger Woods beats him repeatedly with a piece of goat meat, after Barack stepped on his ant farm and killed 9 of Tiger's favorite ants. Tiger, at a West-Germany national conference, is defended by his lawyer, Sarah Palin, and is left free of charge. Tiger runs to become the new president, though Katy Perry is elected instead.

Walt Disney sends Katy a email, threatening to invade Korea before burning all their condoms, leaving America condomless, unless Katy hands over Hawaii. Upon asking why they want Hawaii, Katy's inbox is spammed and she is infected with a mysterious disease.

Meanwhile, George Lucas and Micheal Jackson completely take over New York, and replace lampposts with strip-poles, garbage cans with mini-bars, hospitals with roller coasters. All New York kittens receive a huffing-roster and Twilight is officially banned from bookstores and theaters. Subsequently, Stephenie Meyer joins the Jewish side. Thousands of teenage girl brains melt at the idea of having to choose between Twilight and Justin Bieber.

Canada joins and fucks everything up Twitter their military plans, saying:

OMG, eh! Gonna attack Disneyland Pakistan on February 17th at 12:25 0+ UTC. Can't wait!!! -CanadianMilitary77

Both Pakistan and Disney replied to this.

@CanadianMilitary77 We in uR aeroplanez, bombing all ur d00dz. -PakistaniGurlz882

@CanadianMilitary77....n00bs. -DisneyOverlordABC

Barack Obama, now fully healed by a Egyptian bellydancer, along with Katy Perry and Oprah Winfrey, go on a 5 month vacation to the Artic, upsetting liberals all over the country. Justin Bieber bombs the Eiffel Tower wearing a Mikey Mouse costume, killing a cat in a twist of cruel, cruel irony. Bastards.

On May 26, 2015, Micheal Jackson and his zombies attack Harpo Studio's, delaying season 17 of Oprah for another week. Micheal Jackson is brutally mauled to death by a chiwawa that hails from Pandora. His zombies, who didn't know WTF to do, started to sexually assault the main support pillar, causing the building to crumble, crushing the zombies and Natalie Portman inside.