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Top Ten Sexy Admin Duties
or How To Be An Actual Admin And Not Just Some Fucker With A Banstick

Patrol RecentChanges[edit source]

This is by far the easiest duty. All you need to do is open Recent Changes and look at it. Check diffs of IP edits to ensure they aren't vandalism. Welcome new users that aren't spambots. Patrol unpatrolled edits. Delete shitty pages before they get QVFD'd. No one knows what QVFD means though.

Patrol NewPages[edit source]

Check NewPages to make sure nothing has been missed during RecentChanges patrols.

Patrol the new users log[edit source]

Check the new users log to make sure no spammers or unwelcomed users were missed during RecentChanges patrols.

Feature Articles[edit source]

Go here for an extensive guide to featuring: Uncyclopedia:Adminning/VFH

After five days, the featured article expires, leaving a horrible ugly template occupying space until some enterprising admin features some shit. To avoid this you can:

  1. Read this handy in-depth guide about how to feature an article
  2. Maybe refeature something, anything really.

Feature Images[edit source]

Zombiebaron will write a VFP guide

  1. VFP uses the same personal css as VFH for creating (feature) and (remove) links.

Delete articles[edit source]

  1. VFD
  2. QVFD
  3. UN:M
  4. Special:BrokenRedirects
  5. Special:DoubleRedirects

Don't forget to archive QVFD and VFD. To archive find the current archival page (it will be bolded on the list of archives) and then copypaste the content from the main page to the archival page.

Ban users[edit source]

Sometimes you can be some fucker with a banstick. Add {{BPC|<insert name here>}} above the ban reports you have checked.

Don't forget to archive Ban Patrol. To archive find the current archival page (it will be bolded on the list of archives) and then copypaste the content from the main page to the archival page.

Check the cache[edit source]

What IP's see if a page is having cache-flow problems.

A big one. If you are logged in, you will NEVER notice this problem, which makes it a good thing to log out. If you are on Chrome, you can access the site through incognito mode to get the same effect.

The problem: Sometimes our main pages do not display properly. New users see a serious-looking error screen (right).

In this case, the cache needs to be cleared. One method for Chrome: go to incognito mode, open a bunch of main pages. If any aren't displaying right, go to your normal Chrome window and make a meaningless edit to them. (At the beginning of these pages there is a "no wiki" section, simply add a character, write a silly word, whatever).

Make sure Template:Recent and Template:RecentUnNews are up to date[edit source]

Sometimes bashful/lazy users write things and don't update the template. It's a quick way to freshen up the front page.

Keep the Sitenotice up to date[edit source]

Direct people’s attention to

a) the purpose of the website
b) voting
c) what is going on
d) a new article!

Don't forget to update MediaWiki:Sitenotice id

Keep the Main Page templates updated[edit source]

  1. Add to Template:DidYouKnow
  2. Prune On This Day by going to Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries.
  3. On the UnNews page, it’s easy to add to Template:UnNews_Other_Headlines to let people know you are around and have satirical things on your mind.

Write something[edit source]

All of the above is good to do if you are not inspired to really write. But that is what we are here for, more than anything. The site is propelled by new articles, so always put that first, tidying second.