Trans-Brazilian HighGAYway
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This article is of Brazilian style and hates Argentina, it may talk about things like soccer, samba, bananas or Portuguese jokes. You can talk to its authors by searching for them on the Facebook website or in a Tibia server. Be careful, because this content is controlled by the evil television channel Globo. The Squid president welcomes you for a fantastic adventure in a true Brazilian favela while he dances like a crab. |
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“Humm biaatch.. Posto 9 is so OUT this year. I hear the real freak butterflies are all gathering in the Gasômetro...”
“I promise to use my influence in congress to paint all guard-rails pink and add KY stores all around the HighGAY, biatchesss!!!”
Background[edit | edit source]
Since the estabilishment and growth of colonial cities, transport has been a main factor in restraining the modernization in Brazil. The gay communities that developed on the core of some cities, specially after intense argentine and gaúcho immigration on the XIX century, needed a fast "connection", between them, in order to keep the "movement" going.
Such colorfull towns like Pelotas, Bagé, Porto Alegre, Laguna and Campinas urged a link between themselves and their breeding point, Posto 9 in Rio de Janeiro. Later, a claim to include the city of Ponta Grossa was filed, with sucess.
Construction[edit | edit source]
Construction of the highway began in 1924 and is due to be finished when all gaúchos admit they like the cock. The planned path starts in Pelotas, the gayest town in all Brazil, Crossing the state of Northern Argentina to reach both Porto "Alegre" and Bagé, dubbed "the city in the closet". From there, it stretches northward through the shoreline, to Laguna, the gayest carnival in the south. Ponta Grossa is the next stop, including the greatest gay theme park on the land. Campinas is the last stop before the ultimate breeding point for the brazilian gay, Rio de Janeiro, a city renowned for its ugly shemales.
The project included BIG stretches of WIDE lanes to provide FAST MOTION. Regular asphalt was replaced by Pink limestone with fluorescent paint, providing GRIP, HARDNESS of the surface and TRACTION. Also, it looks terrific!
Tolls[edit | edit source]
Toll booths are present at every 24 kilometers. The price is 24 cents or a blowjob, favouring the Brazilian Old Trannies Association (BOTA).
Controversy[edit | edit source]
Currently the HighGAYway has been ilegally used to smuggle gaúchas (female gender of northern argentinians) to Santa Catarina state, so they can breed and sustain the birth expectancy in their own state.
The large gay community that recently occupied the northern half of Mole Beach in Florianópolis demands the construction of a connection to the highGAYway, thus improving the amount of cock available. Although most gays in there are immigrants, mainly cariocas, gaúchos, lageanos and argentines, they are very well organized, having founding their own football club, FiGAYrense.
Northeastern gays protest against what they see as discrimination towards them, having no acess to the highGAYway whatsoever. Southern fags insist that nordestinos already receive tons of cock-loving european bitches every summer. However, plans are in motion to connect Posto 9 to Salvador, Recife and Fortaleza, as long as the road can reach the cangaceiros. They are another famous type of brazilian butterflies, claiming they are very macho and cut their enemies with knives, although dressing in decorated leather clothes and stylish hats. Hmmm, sugestive.
Many pillow bitters complain about the inclusion of Ponta Grossa in the itinerary. Although meaning "Thick End" in portuguese, it seems that this planned holiday hotspot has not lived to expectations.
Further Development[edit | edit source]
Since Argentine bitches have been ripping of the strass on their high heels in jealousy, brazilian sissies are planning an extension of the HighGAYway to reach Buenos Aires and Mar del Plata via MonteviDEU, enlarging the EXCHANGE between them.
An AirGAYport is under construction near Posto 9, allowing gays to peregrinate to their Mecca, Los Angeles. Proposals of VIRGIN airlines operating a direct flight between LA and Posto 9 were received with the remark "virgin??" and a scandalous laughter.
Other south american coutries have expressed interest in building road links with the brazilian HighGAYway, but no plan was accepted, since no one cares for those stupid countries anyway. Besides, the Andes are too cold and lillies do not blossom in freezing temperatures. That, and the impossibility of showing of in that g-string.