Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/February 12

February 12: Undeniably Heterosexual Graeco-Roman Cultural Appreciation Day

• 804 BC - Prometheus (Pictured) steals fire and gives it to humanity, who use it to braise their finest meats.
• 1502 - Queen Isabella I of Castile bans Islam from her kingdom after getting stood up by an uncouth Moroccan.
• 1817 - During the Argentinian and Chilean wars for independence, joint troops cross the Andes mountains; without elephants, they settle for a herd of vicious llamas instead.
• 1912 - Puyi, the last emperor of China, abdicates the throne after the communists steal all the royal rice cakes.
• 1915 - The Lincoln Memorial begins construction, undercover KKK members secretly install a giant mucky swamp right next to it.
• 1947 - Paris becomes the capital of the fashion industry after Dior releases its collection.
• 2016 - Pope Francis and whoever the Orthodox Pope is meet up and try joining forces to finally defeat those dastardly protestants, but their plan is foiled by their numerous ecumenical differences.

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