User:Names are useless/Article about stuff

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((I'm trying to create my own article from scratch about The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. So here is what I got so far ...))


Boil, boil, toil and trouble!

“I don't get it.”

~ Dumb blonde on the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants

“If I wasn't a guy, I'd SO wear those jeans!”

~ Strong Bad on the magic pants

“How do they all fit into the same pair of pants?”

~ You on the magic pants

“A wizard did it!”

~ Captain Obvious on you on the magic pants

“No, I didn't.”

~ The Wizard that Did It on Captain Obvious on the magic pants


A Brief History[edit | edit source]

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants is a misandric cult composed in 1692 by high-level white mages America Ferrara, Blake Lively, Alexis Bledel, and (most definitely) Hilary Clinton. They also happened to play the four witches in William Shakespeare's Macbeth. The cult was originally formed in the basement of their evil stepmother late one night due to raging pre-teen hormones, adolescent identity crisis, and bad chick flicks.

After the great war with the alchemists and the survival from the Salem witch trials, the Sisterhood attained independence from the Soviet Union. This new-found freedom allowed the sisters to dabble in the occult, voodoo, and read Vanity Fair magazine monthly.

The Traveling Pants[edit | edit source]

Every witch takes a Rite of Passage when chosen amongst the muggles ready to join the sisterhood. For 40 days and 40 nights they must wear the fabled Traveling Pants of yore. Through trials and tribulations they must face, until the Day of Reckoning comes for them. Sadly for some, it never comes.

The pair of magic trousers was forged in the cracks of Mount Doom by the Dark Lord Unicron. The founding four sisters took turns wearing the pants that fits all sizes (much like your mom), minus Rosie O'Donnell. They've never been washed once.

The 10 Rules[edit | edit source]

Much like the Ten Commandments, the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants has its own set of laws that it follows:

  1. Thou shalt not travel without thy pants
  2. Thou shalt not shower without thy pants
  3. Thou shalt not wear a dress without thy pants
  4. Thou shalt not hail Satan without thy pants
  5. Thou shalt not fire thy lazers without thy pants
  6. Thou shalt not be fashionably late without thy pants
  7. Thou shalt not ridicule Uma Thurman's butt looking big in those pants without thy pants
  8. Frazzle snazzle blargh! (this one came to us from Bill Cosby)

The unorthodox branch of sisters have founded their own heathen 11th rule:

11. Thou shalt do whatever thou dost like without thy pants

In the media[edit | edit source]

Oh, and there were some books and films about them, but nobody cares.

Other Members[edit | edit source]

Not Members[edit | edit source]

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