Talk:Captain Obvious

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This is a talk page for the article about Captain Obvious!

“He isn't even in the military”

~ Godfrey Jones on Captain Obvious

Fun Facts Captain Obvious Told Me

Captain Obvious is a parody of Captain America. He is named "Captain Obvious" due to his notable characteristic of stating things that are obvious, and unlike Captain America, his suit and shield are black-and-white instead of red, blue, and white.

I used "and" three times in that sentence.

The first letters in "Captain" and "Obvious" are "C" and "O". These letters are not the same. "C" is the third letter in the alphabet, and therefore cannot be the first or second. "O" is the fifteenth letter in the alphabet, and that is why it cannot be the 26th letter in the alphabet. The first letter I mentioned is a consonant, which is not a vowel, and the second letter I mentioned is a vowel, which is not a consonant.

Remember, "N" on a compass means "North".

Whales have tails like fish do, but they are not fish.

Bikini Bottom from SpongeBob SquarePants is entirely underwater.

Flowers are plants, and so are trees.

World War I was a bad war, and so was World War II.

If you jump off the Burj Khalifa and land head-first on the hard, solid ground below...

...you will die.

People do not wear clothes if they are naked.

Captain Obvious is not actually a captain. It simply happens that he is a parody of Captain America, who is a Marvel superhero and not a captain either.

If you looked at the Earth from space, much of the land would be green.

That's because much of it is covered with plants, such as grass.

Everything stated here is obviously obvious.

But this is not the end of the list of obvious facts!

Hitler was very mean and rude. *insert mad emoji*

I edited this talk page. Oh, and did you ever realize that this was a talk page?

San Francisco is very foggy.

Stop reading this post. Actually, it is not physically impossible for you to continue reading it. In fact, you have the right to.

Okay, that was pretty long.

People are humans. And humans are people.

Shadows are dark, not bright.

I will be updating this post when Captain Obvious tells me more fun facts. 73.235.91.43 (talk) 04:54, 17 February 2021 (UTC)

Captain Obvious in Russia

It is strange, but Captain Obvious is REALLY popular in Russia and all ex-USSR countries. Here, home of russian C.O. - www.KapitanO.ru

Identity Revealed

... I believe I very well might be Captain Obvious.

Newprofile001 03:46, December 25, 2009 (UTC)

Potential Change? (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Potential Change?")

Is this where we request edits? If so... "This could be because Captain Obvious has failed to apprehend or destroy Professor Subtle in any way." to " This could be because Captain Obvious has failed to apprehend, comprehend or destroy Professor Subtle in any way. " 12.2.08

Change the russian version to " Это русская версия капитана Очевидности" . That would be correct.

“Judging by the lair's diagram, it consists of a series of booby traps which could potentially injure someone...or worse.”

   ~ Captain Obvious on the lair 

Change to: “Judging by the lair's diagram, it consists of a series of tubes which could potentially injure someone...or worse.”

   ~ Captain Obvious on the internets

Also the "Ican't Belive It's not butter" quote should be changed to "I can't belive it's not hitler Resulting in:

“It looks like Hitler,it tastes like Hitler, it's used like Hitler, yet it doesn't appear to actually be Hitler.”

   ~ Captain Obvious on I can't believe it's not hitler

America (Here you can find a discussion titled: "America")

It should be obvious specially to Captain Obvious that America isn't a fucking country shouldn't it?

Is this a question on Captain Obvious? (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Is this a question on Captain Obvious?")

Why hasn't Captain Obvious stated that he is Captain Obvious due to his great ability to be obvious?

That is correct, Captain Obvious does have the ability of being obviouos. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_shit%2C_Sherlock. This gag needs to be flamed like the Russian Reversal quotes. --AmericanBastard 07:17, 25 January 2007 (UTC)

Definitely not an assortment of entries (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Definitely not an assortment of entries")

This is the talk page for the Uncyclopedia article known as "Captain Obvious".

I should point out that in the quotes ("If a tree falls in the woods...etc"), "paradox" is spelt without it's middle "a".

Looks like the UKers hit this article. It's always so subtle. "We're not jealous of the US, we just think Bin Laden is misunderstood and race-mixers should be done away with."

Idea: change the featured article template to make it obvious (in the style of Captain Obvious). Or would that be going overboard? KaloFoxfire 20:38, 3 April 2006 (UTC)

Question: Huh? Picklefork 23:19, 3 April 2006 (UTC)

I mean like how Morse Code has all its templates changed to morse code, and AAAA! has its in all A's. What I'm suggesting (or not suggesting, as it may be going overboard), is having the Featured Article template down at the bottom read something like "This article, Captain Obvious, is a featured article! This means that it was featured on the front page, which is the main page of Uncyclopedia!" And so on and so forth. Obviously, it would be much better written than that. KaloFoxfire 13:20, 7 April 2006 (UTC)

On second fourth I mean third fourth fifth thought, it -would- be going overboard. If this article was about being obvious or something, then it might be appropriate. But this is about Captain Obvious. So forget I said anything. KaloFoxfire 12:47, 10 April 2006 (UTC)

And now, the greatest question of our age; if Captain Obvious and [[1]] were to meet, how many universes would be destroyed and how many issues would it take? 67.161.116.49 03:55, 7 April 2006 (UTC)

Perhaps one could add the following once the page becomes unprotected?

“Xenogears are gears that are xeno.”

~ Captain Obvious on Xenogears

What was wrong with the SW stuff? - Sikon 18:40, 2 June 2006 (UTC)

I love Captain Obvious. Just wanted to point that out. My 15 minutes of fame. Dumitru 19:58, 4 June 2006 (UTC)

why isn't... (Here you can find a discussion titled: "why isn't...")

this article in the self-reference category?

Errors (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Errors")

Penis is spelled pinis. Is that on purpose? Also the arm and pinis aren't internal organs

This user has stated the obvious.

---

- Sikon 04:36, 14 November 2006 (UTC)

~Also this is not the Wikipedia.

But the signature method is the same. 21:28, 22 January 2007 (UTC)

Why... (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Why...")

Is Captain Obvious all washed out now? He was just fine in Techinicolor.--Witt, of UNion Entertain me* 19:56, 15 January 2007 (UTC)

Because Captain America is bias. 20:47, 15 January 2007 (UTC)

Fucking Fantastic (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Fucking Fantastic")

Great job. Quadzilla99 16:35, 25 January 2007 (UTC)

Obvious Man (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Obvious Man")

This is a sad rip-off of obvious man.

• They are both sad ripoffs of Vegeta

Captian Obvious (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Captain Obvious")

“I'm not even that stupid”

~ Captain Obvious on Gorge W. Bush

"100% of all people will die, except Chuck Norris"- Captain Obvious on death--68.7.133.145 00:38, 21 May 2007 (UTC)

THE Top Article of '06? (Here you can find a discussion titled: "THE Top Article of '06?")

This is the top article of '06? It was good but there are others that are much better and funnier. The French Revolution didn't even make the list!

This section is about the main article (Here you can find a discussion titled: "This section is about the main article")

This article is about Captain Obvious.

No shit, Sherlock. --AAA! (AAAA) 10:25, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

I just heard... (Here you can find a discussion titled: "I just heard...")

...Captain Obvious (when asked about Sparta):

"THIS...IS...SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Seems kinda obvious.

This is a bit of a big change to propose (Here you can find a discussion titled: "This is a bit of a big change to propose")

...but I think this article could do with a serious dose of (don't laugh) subtlety. As people have said, this is the Captain Obvious article, not the Obviousness article, so our humour doesn't have to mach the style of the subject. Things like the Titanic image I like, things like "Mr. Obvious has Obvious as a last name" I can't help feeling are a little.. trivial, and poorly thought-out. So, even though it's still pretty sub-par example, I'd like to see more of the "That looks quite dangerous" on the subject of knife-throwing, or "If you're going to go skydiving, you'll probably want a parachute".

Just one man's opinion, of course --85.210.163.133 13:15, 16 April 2007 (UTC)

Clerking for SCOTUS? (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Clerking for SCOTUS?")

Recent pronouncement of Captain Obvious in KSR v. Teleflex:

We build and create by bringing to the tangible and palpable reality around us new works based on instinct,simple logic, ordinary inferences, extraordinary ideas, and sometimes even genius.

Oooh, that word "palpable" just sends chills up and down my spine. Imagine the horror if we only brought things to tangible reality....--Unowa 03:35, 3 May 2007 (UTC)

“It does exactly what is says on the tin.” (Here you can find a discussion titled: "It does exactly what is says on the tin.")

Is this supposed to be deliberately misquoted into grammatical nonsense or is it just an obvious typo?

Qupte (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Qupte")

Can someone add this? "... there were 50 planes and now there are 100 planes. And that's almost twice as many planes." - Teh Captain...

Should we make an Unquotable page for all the Captain Obvious quotes? (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Should we make an Unquotable page for all the Captain Obvious quotes?")

If they stay in the article, they'll just clutter up the page. --General Insineratehymn 22:18, 9 June 2007 (UTC)

The REAL Captain Obvious... (Here you can find a discussion titled: "The REAL Captain Obvious...")

Guess you guys missed this guy...

http://myspace.com/captainxavierobvious Captain Xavier Obvious' myspace.

Apparantly he's part of a super league???

Superleagueofsuperheroes.com The SLS

Captain Obvious and Captain Oblivious (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Captain Obvious and Captain Oblivious")

How can Captain Obvious and Captain Oblivious be arch-enemies? Captain Oblivious would be oblivious to the fact that his arch-enemy is Captain Obvious and that he is the arch-enemy of Captain Obvious, and Captain Obvious would state, well, the obvious and say that Captain Oblivious would be oblivious to Captain Obvious, meaning they can't be rivals.

Or maybe I'm just stating the obvious.

Or maybe Captain Oblivious would take a disliking to Captain Obvious, but is oblivious to the fact that Captain Obvious can beat the crap out of him.

This is uncyclopedia. Logic is suspended until further notice. R3tr0r0ck3r 17:01, 20 March 2008 (UTC)

Espanish Version (Here you can find a discussion titled: "Espanish Version")

Excuze me, I'm an emisary of the spanish version of Uncyclopedia: The Inciclopedia. I came here with my inferior uses of the english to say that we already have an article for Captain Obvious in our Wiki. Check this out. I just pay to some Administrator put this [[es:Capitán Obvio]] at the end of the article. Thank you very much, Manolo.

I'm not an op, but done. –—Hv (talk) 6/03 19:38

Thank you, señor

Russian version is here: ru:Капитан Очевидность 77.66.158.19 08:36, 12 May 2008 (UTC)

There is also a Dutch version http://oncyclopedia.net/wiki/Kapitein_Overduidelijk

What happened to the Homsar picture? (Here you can find a discussion titled: "What happened to the Homsar picture?")

The caption said something along the lines of Captain Obvious's clothing line. (Homsar's shirt has "homsar" on it.) <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 22:08, 26 November 2008 (UTC)

Vacuum...

Vacuum is misspelled "vaccum". 206.174.68.107 20:22, 19 January 2009 (UTC) I'm not sure if that was Captain Obvious making a comment. 80.186.221.170 04:54, 29 April 2009 (UTC)

A Obvious Quote

"Don't fall it gets you down" - Captain Obvious on falling --SunJian 21:33, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

"It's where you can watch videos!" - Captain Obvious on Youtube --User:Marcen12

Put this in

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30336590&l=8396b603ae&id=1310873067

Italian version http://nonciclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Capitan_Ovvio

Somebody mention the fact that Captain Obvious was a vampire hunter who wrote a book called "Shit It Took Me Way Too Long To Figure Out: Vol. 1." Source: http://www.cracked.com/article/128_7-vampires-around-world-worse-than-ones-in-twilight/

The Great Obfuscater

Captain Obvious's greatest enemy is the Obfuscater. The Obfuscater is the greatest villain ever spawned by the human race. His evil plan is to baffle the human race and fck with their heads. His most potent inventions have been politics, organized religion, and Duct Tape.

Captain Obvious fought the Obfuscater at the Battle of Dawn. Captain Obvious's forces surrounded the Obfuscater and completely isolated him from his allies. Obfuscater threatened the destroy the earth with his ray gun, but Obvious responded by saying that ray guns are not real. Soundly beaten, Obfuscater surrendered his entire empire to Obvious. He was allowed to escape with only his life, whereupon he subsequently became the speechwriter for President Obama.

Real life image

Should be added to article:

Missing Villains

Hey! Why aren't Captains Irrelevent, Understatement, and Sarcastic listed as Captain Obvious' arch nemesises'!?! Please add them, someone who had authority.

Original Source?

Anyone know the original source of this? --81.138.95.57 11:50, April 10, 2012 (UTC)