User talk:Kwakerjak

Welcome!

Hello, Kwakerjak, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

• Beginner's Guide
• How to be funny and not just stupid

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If you need help, ask me on my talk page, or ask at the Dump. Again, welcome!  -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 00:09, 28 September 2006 (UTC)

Cookie!

§ǚρωξλ£μĦΦφ≈€ƏξßÐÆØΞ has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Not only for spiffing up my French Revolution and finally giving it a decent, honest-to-goodness ending (the Napoleon one), as well as adding a considerable amount of other jokes, but also because you spotted the Les Miserables reference. Good show! -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 23:52, 7 October 2006 (UTC)

Solid Gold on VFH

I wouldn't worry about not finding it funny; although others have, they are not right in the head. Wait, I though it had funny bits...hmmm. I think that I just zinged myself. Darn.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 01:34, 9 October 2006 (UTC)

Oscar Wilde

We've been discussing doing a rewrite of the Oscar Wilde article at the Dump (the discussion was at the dump, not doing the rewrite there. That'd be SILLY). I was wondering if you'd be interested. I thought you did a really good job on the Napoleon rewrite, so I thought you might actually be able to pull this off. What do you think?--<<>> 03:31, 20 October 2006 (UTC)

• It does sound interesting, but I'm not sure that my style of writing would be best for such a prominent page. I seem to be getting a lot of comments that I have "too many facts" in my articles (as if the inclusion of facts always makes an article less funny). --Kwakerjak 11:52, 20 October 2006 (UTC)

Yes, but those people are idiots. ;) "Too many facts" is one of the original pillars we were built on, back in the day. It's become more "vogue" to use silly, goofball humor to appeal to the masses, but intelligent humor that's mixed with goofy humor is still the ideal (for a lot of us "old schoolers" from last year, anyway). Anyeay, if you don't want to do Wilde, that's fine, but consider rewriting Adolf Hitler, instead. Those two articles are the two that most severely need a rewrite. In reality all this is is a fan of your article asking for "more, please."  ;)--<<>> 12:50, 20 October 2006 (UTC)

Well, the recent Martin Van Buren article has me thinking about rewriting William Henry Harrison, because in addition to being one of history's greatest punchlines, he basically got elected on a platform of "Martin Van Buren is a son of a bitch." (Seriously.) --Kwakerjak 14:15, 20 October 2006 (UTC)

Very true.--<<>> 22:42, 20 October 2006 (UTC)

VFH nomination

Thanks for the Political advertising nomination. I should be clear about your presidential articles: You do a fantastic job of satirizing the typical Election summary. Not that it's your only talent, though. Also, I'm glad to see someone's rewriting the James Buchanan article. Anyway, good stuff, and thanks again.--Procopius 05:07, 5 November 2006 (UTC)

behold

For the Napoleon Article

--Private First Class Nappoleon V ^{Talk Decorations} 19:00, 5 November 2006 (UTC)

Hey there rightful heir to the NotM throne

Now that I have your attention, an IP is making changes to your U.S. Presidential Election, 1960. The changes seem kind of arbitrary but don't seem to be vandalism, so I'm thinking it's either you doing it because you forgot to login (i do that all the time) or someone adding pointless stuff to your article. Just thought I'd give you a heads up. --Anyone 20:27, 7 November 2006 (UTC)

U.S. Presidential Election, 1948

I left some comments on my talk page, but basically, I like. One thing -- you know that story about the president and the journalist supposedly happened to Charles Evans Hughes in 1916, right? Not that it hurts the story (or that we deal in facts here), and if it was a deliberate choice, mazel tov.--Procopius 17:39, 22 November 2006 (UTC)

VFH

Braydie has awarded you some ice cream! For voting for HowTo:Make a Band

--—Braydie 17:04, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

Tasty!

Goshzilla has given me a tasty ice cream cone! Mmmmmmmmm!

Not all conservatives are evil! --goshzillacorrespondence 02:07, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

XMas

Bradaphraser was throwing away last year's Christmas cards, and realised they had purposefully forgotten about you. This user is completely thoughtless, doesn't care about Multi-culturalism, and therefore DEMANDS you have yourself a Merry little Christmas... NOW! Failure to comply with result in disciplinary action up to and including excommunication from the Capitalist Church

May you focus on your successes and forget your failures here at the end of the year. Never forget how we all improve one another's lives. Season's Greetings.--<<>> 17:35, 17 December 2006 (UTC)

U.S. Presidential Election, 1840

We're making another attempt to get this featured. If you're still around, know your good work is not forgotten. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get hammered and push a big leather ball around.--Procopius 02:26, 21 February 2007 (UTC)