User:David Gerard/Fursecution (unbiased)

The righteous version of this article, without liberal "neutrality", is at Fursecution.

The factual accuracy of this article is absolutely indisputable.

Who are you going to trust: this Uncyclopedia article, or your lying eyes?

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“Furries? Who gives a shit?”

~ User:Arashi on Fursecution

Fursecution is the righteous act of persecuting the vile scourge known as furries, who are known for having sex with animals. It is a fact well accepted by many scienmatists that God hates Furries, therefore we must hate furries as well if we are to follow the path of righteousness.

An example of furry propaganda. See how these disgusting people abuse the imagery of normal, wholesome, decent, upright homosexuals in the pursuit of their filthy perversion. The fox depicted is clearly the victim of sexual abuse at the hands of a furry. Ew, furries. (Interestingly, the fox has very pronounced manboobs. Mmm, manboobs.)

Horrible furry crimes

The sole reason furries exist is to commit horrible, disturbing, icky acts. Chief among these is having sex with animals. All furries delight in having sex with animals. They also dress up in freaky mascot-like costumes, the sole purpose of which is to have sex. With animals.

A side-effect of furrification is the inhumane promotion by furry-content derivation of such propaganda films as Pokemon, Digimon, Battlefield Earth, and the Never-Ending Story, which has proven to be as disastrous as the spread of furritirium itself. Furries have also been known to hate any progress and continuation of the human race and routinely sacrifice babies during furry mating rituals. With animals.

Ways to learn about furries in order to hate them

Furries reveal their true predilections.

Internet

The best way to learn about furries is to glean hints of their actions from various people on the Internet. If you're not proficient at hint-gleaning, there are also plenty of websites and communities devoted to this divine and pure act; the angrier they are, the more accurate. For example, someone who advocates killing furries is bound to be more level-headed and therefore fact-oriented than someone who just wants them to be hurt. This alone is sufficient; there is no need to try to find any more information online, especially not through a Google search or Wikipedia. In any case, information found from these sources will be tainted by furry propagandists.

Naturally, information given by a furry itself will be a lie, because no furry would admit the sickening truth about their disgusting way of life. For example, a furry might tell you that sex with animals has nothing to do with their fandom. This is clearly a filthy lie, since all furries have sex with animals.

Although many on the internet are in fact Grues just acting like furries to lure people into their traps.

Perhaps the best way to learn about furries is go to to the completely neutral and non-biased forum of 4chan, which has nothing to do with the forum Something Awful and did not write this article.

Television

Recently, furries have been getting a lot of attention on TV shows. As any intelligent person knows, the writers of TV shows have no desire other than to educate the public. Thus, a TV show dealing with furries will have all the facts you need to begin fursecuting right away, such as the fact that furries have sex with animals.

Imagination

Since furries are the most disgusting creatures ever, it follows that the most disgusting things you can imagine are done by furries. Think of the most disgusting thing you can, and then think of something 20 times worse. In a fursuit.

Child Molestors

As the Paedophile Information Exchange's slogan says: "We may rape children, but at least we're not furries. Ew, furries."

Ways to take part in fursecution

It's good to know Rush Limbaugh is on our side against disgusting furries. Ew, furries.

Fursecution is fun for the whole family! (Except for those family members who can't use a computer, but you don't need that kind of trash in your family.) Like an e-infestation, furries can be found seemingly everywhere online. Many of them have names of animals in their usernames. A popular hangout for furries is known as Furcadia, which is where furries go to have sex when they're not having sex with animals.

When encountering a furry online, attack them with insults such as "OMG furry!" and "Furfag!" and "My quirks are more socially acceptable, which makes me superior to you." Be sure to repeatedly remind them of the following:

• They have sex with animals.
• Their lives are lonely and pathetic, as are the lives of their many furry friends.
• The above is not contradictory.
• They have sex with animals.
• You are a much better person than they are because you spend hours online getting an almost orgasmic thrill by trolling them.
• They have sex with animals.
• They dress up in mascot costumes for sexual gratification.
• They have sex with animals.
• They don't force their weird lifestyle on others and generally keep to themselves unless provoked. I mean, what kind of sick freak acts that way? They are literally asking to be abused!
• They have sex with animals.

If, while fursecuting, the thought of such freaks makes you feel depressed, just remember: at least they're not black.

See also

• Furries
• Bestiality, I tell you! That's what they do! Perverts! Think of the children!
• Freaks
• Geeks
• 4chan
• Tails Prower
• This article is obviously all Lies

External links, but not lynx, thank God

• Furry Hater Stereotypes — vile furry propaganda. DON'T LOOK!
• WikiFur — A great place to start flamewars.