UnGames:OBS 9000BC

ESCAPE FROM OJAI MINUS-CCCLXXIX Club you, unoriginal rockface!!!!

OOGA BOOGA SIMULATOR 9000 B.C.

A Now-Submerged Coast Adventure

Me Hooga-Chaka. Hooga-Chaka get trusty stick, me hunt mammoth, me hate enemy dog-face tribe.

This where me live:

Me like it here. Only warm place in ice age. Great sky spirit, me hate global cooling so much.

Hooga-Chaka very old, me survive   llllllllllll   llllllllllll   llllllllllll   llllllllllll   llllllllllll   llllllllllll   llllllllllll summers. Me no can throw spear far anymore. Young guys they come bully me for, they call me "boom-boomer". Probably because me voice loud. Because me voice loud, me growl loud, me scare 'em away.

Hooga-Chaka no have patience. Let me tell you story of   llllllllllll   llllllllllll winters past. You probably no alive back then. Back then, obsidian arrowhead not invented yet. We all use flint and bone. You caveling all have it easy.

But now me really tell you campfire story! So remember, me hate dog-face tribe, because they have dog face. Me big big burning rage-hate them.

Hooga-Chaka shit on their burial grounds, Hooga-Chaka bang bang their chief's   llllllllllll   llllllllllll llll -year-old daughter. She get pregnant. Dog-face chief get big angry. Dog-face tribe now at war with us.

Now Hooga-Chaka go fight them. But first Hooga-Chaka go hunt for feed tribe.

• Me start my story here.

Editing Rules

• I, OPOSSUM, am the only person who can edit this game right now. Once this remotely resembles a game, this rule will be removed, so, everyone else will be able to edit as well.
• Use the {{../Link}} "template" to connect pages to each other. It's a combination of the KetchiLink and Goto templates, but harder to use than either of them. I'll explain how it works later, if I can!
• This game is supposed to be a prehistoric man's recollection of his past. Speak in the first person.
• Keep the in-jokes to a minimum, although they may be referenced occasionally. Let's make something actually funny this time.
• This is a relatively small project, meant to tide people over until the completion of Turb0's Bust into Boston.
• This is NOT an Escape from Ojai game, and its scope should be small. Just a little side project.
• Don't flood this game with insta-death pages. This isn't a traditional UnGame.