Neil deGrasse Tyson
| |
|---|---|
 Neil deGrasse Tyson, seen here groping the moon | |
| Born | |
| Nationality | Rationalian |
| Occupation | CinemaSins, but for space |
Neil deGrasse Tyson (born October 5, 1958) is a professional nitpicker of movies and TV shows. He also dabbles in astrophysics and science science education. When Tyson is not criticizing certain stars for being insufficiently luminous, he gives scientific advice to authors and screenwriters so that their stories about flying magic superheroes are more scientifically accurate.
Early life[edit | edit source]
Neil deGrasse Tyson is the son of a reddit comment thread and the Wikipedia article on List of common misconceptions. Tyson was born with a moustache and a telescope in his hands, claimed his mother in an interview with Lex Fridman.
Career[edit | edit source]
Tyson hosts Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey, a PBS show in which he zips through space to yell at aliens for not being real. He is also director of the Hayden Planetarium, which means he gets to decide what the planets look like. If he is the only black scientist you can think of, you are 100% confirmed racist. Aside from his social media and television presence, he is also a prolific author, having written numerous books about astronauts farting themselves into lunar orbit, a plot trope commonly found within works of science fiction.
Personal life[edit | edit source]
Views[edit | edit source]
Like many public intellectuals, Tyson is an atheist, which means that he looks out at the night sky—not in humble awe at the beauty of our God's creation—but only in the smug assurance that there is nothing to see but a godless, empty void populated with the faint glimmers of dead stars.
Sexual misconduct allegations[edit | edit source]
“I became an astrophysicist because I didn’t believe in the boundaries of space, time, or consent.”
– Neil deGrasse Tyson, allegedly
Neil deGrasse Tyson was accused of separate incidents of sexual misconduct, one involving an inappropriate handshake, another of inappropriate comments, and the other of going full Bill Cosby. On December 1, 2018, he posted a Facebook response to the allegations, in which Tyson argued that since electrons repel each other, atoms (and by extension, probing fingers) don't technically touch at all, but only hover at distances too infinitesimally small to humanly comprehend.
Following an investigation by the International Astronomical Union, NDT was cleared of all charges except those of being too touchy-feely, and all his TV shows and income were restored to him twofold.
See also[edit | edit source]
| Branches | |
| Fundamental Concepts |
Chemical bonding · Gayon · Space · Speed of light · UnNews:Scientist sheds new light on speed of light · Anti-Gravity · Electricity · Gravity · Quantum Murphydynamics · Sophia |
| Important People |
Albert Einstein · Richard Feynman · Michio Kaku · J. Robert Oppenheimer · Neil deGrasse Tyson |