“This page is about a fictional city.”
|City Name||Cartoon City|
|Founded||1921, when cartoons were most likely invented.|
|Population||361,542 citizens; 57,129 cartoons (NOTE: Cartoons don't count as citizens)|
|Awards||Most Likely To Have Cuban Drug Lords, Most Likely to be Attacked by a Grue Army, & Most Likely to Give You Radiation Poisoning.|
|Average Citizen Income||$80,000-$200,000|
|Does Chuck Norris Have a Condo Here?||I don't know really.|
|Mayor||Hank R. Hill|
|Military Bases||1 isn't nuclear, 2 are nuclear and radioactive.|
|Media||Various Radio Stations and TV stations|
This page contains language that is
very inappropriate very appropriate for sm all children.
In 1921, so many cartoons were being created at once. So the bureaucrats in the senate tried to fix the problem by giving the little burdens a home of their own. This turned out to be a fatal mistake as the city soon became over-populated, and many foreign cartoons, such as Japanese Anime, were deported with massive prejudice. Yet, since it was the 20's, no one cared.
In 1957, beatniks, such as Bugs Bunny and Stalin came to the city and started the Aryan
Racist Society of Evil (A.R.S.E.). In response, Joseph McCarthy condemned the city as a place of communist, Anti-American, liberal domain. Many citizens rioted, beginning what was known as the "57 freefall".
In 1963, Beatlemania gripped the nation. Going to go with the trend, cartoons such as Popeye began protesting the Beatles in an Anti-Foreigner rant about the "Status Quota". As a result, the American Nationalist Movement gained a strong foothold in the city. As the Civil Rights Movement came to be, the city's views changed like the rest of the nation's. Yet a radical group, also going by the name of A.R.S.E., thought that the city was becoming corrupted by the civil rights movement, and started the White Ultra Socialist State (W.U.S.S.) outside of the United States Border on an island (See New Mexico).
1987 was a peaceful year for the city, as nothing happened. So, disregard this paragraph.
2000, Y2K fever gripped the city, and fear speculated, causing Mayor Hank Hill to leave office. At the Last minute, Sir Mix Alot took control and a crime wave hit the city, leading from sophisticated families, like the Mafia, to Street Gangs taking control of the city.
Presently, Cartoon City is a wonderful place due to the downfall of crime lord Spongebob Squarepants in a spectacular attack by a machine that appeared to be from the future! Now, under the leadership of Mayor Hank R. Hill, Cartoon City has begun to prosper in industry, film, and gambling. Yet, the future is not written...
- The Sampson's
- The Fascist Guy Family
- The Mafia
- Ed, Edd, n' Eddy
- Magilla Gorilla
- Dale Gribble
- 10,000 legal cartoon
slavesforced servants who labor for the stupid.
- The Hill Family
- Sgt. Pepper
Cartoon City has 5 distinct districts and a military complex not known about by the city's citizens:
- Hommack: The commercial town center, where the mayoral office, the really tall building that pokes above the clouds, and all of the other stores and shops that are in the town . This is a Mafia controlled area. Populated by anyone who wants to make a quick buck.
- Raving: The Surrounding Area of the city, populated by hicks and anyone who enjoys the overlook of the city. Held by the Ed's and the old Kanker Gang.
- Johnson: A Casino and Hotel polluted area, populated by the rich and powerful, all the way to the scummy underbelly of the city. Held by the Cartel.
- Harding: The Beachfront Properties, populated by the wealthy aristocrats. Houses the Town's various TV and radio stations.
- The Slums: Populated by the poor, dirty, homeless, and the various street gangs of the city.
- Algonquin 1, 2, and 3: The City's three military facilities where they test nukes underground, experiment on aliens, and develop new technology without the liberal media covering it all. I hope I don't get arrested for sharing this information.
Notable Political Parties, Politicians & Mayors
- 1921-1943: Bob Dole
- 1944-1950: Captain Obvious
- 1951-1955: Oscar Wilde
- 1956-1987: The Great Cornholio
- 1988-2000: Hank R. Hill
- 2001-January, 2010: Sir Mix Alot
- February, 2010- Who knows when...:Hank R. Hill
Colleges & Schools
The city has multiple colleges and schools, including a wide range of private schools in the town's central district. The town also has three major public high schools and elementary/middle schools located on the borders of each district. Each school mascot is based on one of the many famous cartoon characters prancing about the streets (Ex. Goofy).
Other Major Facilities
Located in the eastern portion of the town is the Maxwell State Penitentiary. The prison facility doubles as a major prison (which it contains prisoners from three surrounding counties) and an insane asylum for the slightly nervous, to the people who can't understand what they are saying.
In the outskirts of town, there is a KACC fuel military facility that supplies the Algonquin base complex. The facility is guarded by an approx. force of the entire capacity of Algonquin 1.
Lastly, there is an airport in the lower portion of the city. Various flights to other cities include flights to Vice City, Liberty City, Los Santos, Las Venturas, San Fierro, Carcer City, and multiple other U.S. and foreign cities.