User:Martinultima

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Welcome to User:Martinultima’s Page

The conveniently cheap userpage that nobody in their right minds should edit

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“Be warned in time, James, and remain, as I do, incomprehensible: to be great is to be misunderstood.”

– Oscar Wilde

Click on Oscar Wilde's handsome face to be taken to one of our best articles!
Choose the next front page article. Write something funny. Do something pointless today.

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured.png

Extension:DynamicPageList (DPL), version 3.1.1: Warning: No results.

Rough Gay Wolf Sex, featured on 19 June 2015: Featured version
Captain Britain, featured on 19 June 2014: Featured version
Why?:Did I Decide to Audition for Big Brother?, featured on 19 June 2013: Featured version

Did you know...

  • ... that Ronald Reagan wasn't the Devil... just really drunk?
  • ... that prune juice is the world's brownest juice, eventually?
  • ... that Ronald Reagan wasn't the Devil... just really drunk?
  • ... that prune juice is the world's brownest juice, eventually?
  • ... that Ronald Reagan wasn't the Devil... just really drunk?
  • ... that prune juice is the world's brownest juice, eventually?
  • ... that Ronald Reagan wasn't the Devil... just really drunk?

In the news

Rapper XXXTentacion shot and killed at 20
XXXTentacion pronounced dead, but how the fuck do you pronounce his name?

On this day...

I can taste it just looking at the picture.

June 19: Synthetic Cheese Product Day (Netherlands)

Today's featured picture

{{Votevfp.dpl|image=Potatochopcs.jpg |name=Adobe Potatochop CS |size=250px |caption=Adobe Potatochop is the industry standard software for chip production amongst chip shops the length and breadth of England. Available with a number of plugins, including the most recent 'extra crispy' update, it is, along with Adobe Suppersready one of Adobe's most well known pieces of software. |credit=Mhaille |nom= |fornumber=24 |for=

  1. Nom and For. Feel free to change that shitty caption. --Icons-flag-us.png SonicChao Babbel!Contribs 15:32, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
  2. For, surprisingly. ~ GhelĂŠ talkcontribs 15:37, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
  3. For---Asteroid B612B612.jpg (aka Rataube) - Ñ 15:57, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
  4. for, although I use PaintChop Pro myself Modusoperandi 18:54, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
  5. For. -- Sir C America...Fuck Yeah!!!! Holla | CUN 02:46, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  6. For, although MS Patato is much better. --Uncyclon - Do we still link to BENSON? 07:57, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  7. For -- Brigadier Sir Mordillo Icons-flag-il.png GUN UotY WotM FP UotM AotM MI3 AnotM VFH +S 10:58, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  8. Hmmmmmm, difficult one. This User has contributed some suspect images in the past, but I'll give him/her the benefit of the doubt. For. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me) 16:51, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  9. For, I guess. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 00:55, 4 August 2006 (UTC)
  10. For. I use Curly Potato-Paint myself, but am looking to upgrade. -- Imrealized ...hmm? 20:21, 5 August 2006 (UTC)
  11. For Nice work with my pun Mhaille. --Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 22:00, 8 August 2006 (UTC)
  12. For Good job! Dawg.gif » Brig Sir Dawg | t | v | c » 23:11, 9 August 2006 (UTC)
  13. For. -- Hindleyite | PL | GUN | WOTM | Image Review - Use it | Converse 16:57, 11 August 2006 (UTC)
  14. For I like it. --User:Tom mayfair/Sig 20:27, 11 August 2006 (UTC)
  15. Yay Looks good, and everyone loves chips. - NewMess1ah 22:59, 11 August 2006 (UTC)
  16. For this thing has been sitting her for ages, so i decided to give it a push, scince its easyer to goforward than back. --Parinoid 02:07, 15 August 2006 (UTC)
  17. Marco Raimey
  18. Mathgeek747
  19. toratoritore
  20. Â§ÇšÏÏ‰ÎŸÎ»ÂŁÎŒÄŠÎŠÏ†â‰ˆâ‚ŹÆÎŸĂŸĂĂ†Ă˜Îž
  21. Theotherwhitemeat
  22. Martinultima
  23. Manforman
  24. Nom and For this thing is damn funny, and funny.--silicson 14:56, 3 January 2009 (UTC)

|againstnumber=5 |against=

  1. Against... Are you kidding me? What's funny about this? It's a kakun-pun, at best. --~ sin($) tan(€) 15:29, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  2. NEG-A-TIVE. Technically, it's already been featured via VFH (as the thumbnail,) but I agree with MoneySign (shock!) that it's little more than a pun, and a weak one outside the context of its parent article. --The King In Yellow (Talk to the Dalek.) 16:11, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  3. Small Against. It's Mhaille. I'm alergic. --Boy Toy bitch at me 22:03, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  4. Against Shouldn't it be Potatochip? FreeMorpheme 11:34, 7 August 2006 (UTC)
  5. Bradaphraser

|comments=Featured Same score as the Super Soaker one, but this one gets the nod because it's older. —rc (t) 05:02, 17 August 2006 (UTC) |%PAGE%=Uncyclopedia:VFP/Potatochopcs.jpg|%TITLE%=VFP/Potatochopcs.jpg|%DATE%=|%USER%=|%ARGS%=§image=Potatochopcs.jpg §name=Adobe Potatochop CS §size=250px §caption=Adobe Potatochop is the industry standard software for chip production amongst chip shops the length and breadth of England. Available with a number of plugins, including the most recent 'extra crispy' update, it is, along with Adobe Suppersready one of Adobe's most well known pieces of software. §credit=Mhaille §nom= §fornumber=24 §for=

  1. Nom and For. Feel free to change that shitty caption. --{User:SonicChao/sig} 15:32, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
  2. For, surprisingly. {:User:Ghelae/sig} 15:37, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
  3. For--{User:Rataube/sig} 15:57, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
  4. for, although I use PaintChop Pro myself User:Modusoperandi§Modusoperandi 18:54, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
  5. For. --{User:Sir Cornbread/sig} 02:46, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  6. For, although MS Patato is much better. --{User:OsirisX/sig} 07:57, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  7. For --{User:Mordillo/sig} 10:58, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  8. Hmmmmmm, difficult one. This User has contributed some suspect images in the past, but I'll give him/her the benefit of the doubt. For. -- {User:Mhaille/sig} 16:51, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
    • *administers smackies to Mhaille for self-referential wise-arsery* Bad admin, bad! Heh.. --{User:King In Yellow/sig} 16:56, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  9. For, I guess. -- {User:Codeine/sig} 00:55, 4 August 2006 (UTC)
  10. For. I use Curly Potato-Paint myself, but am looking to upgrade. -- {User:Imrealized/sig} 20:21, 5 August 2006 (UTC)
  11. For Nice work with my pun Mhaille. --{User:Zombiebaron/sig} 22:00, 8 August 2006 (UTC)
  12. For Good job! {User:Dawg/sig} 23:11, 9 August 2006 (UTC)
  13. For. -- User:Hindleyite§Hindleyite {!} Uncyclopedia:Poo Lit Surprise§PL {!} Order of Uncyclopedia§GUN {!} UN:WRITE§WOTM {!} User:Hindleyite/Image Review§Image Review - Use it {!} User talk:Hindleyite§Converse 16:57, 11 August 2006 (UTC)
  14. For I like it. --{User:Tom mayfair/Sig} 20:27, 11 August 2006 (UTC)
  15. Yay Looks good, and everyone loves chips. - User:NewMess1ah§NewMess1ah 22:59, 11 August 2006 (UTC)
  16. For this thing has been sitting her for ages, so i decided to give it a push, scince its easyer to goforward than back. --User:Parinoid§Parinoid 02:07, 15 August 2006 (UTC)
  17. {u§Marco Raimey}
  18. {u§Mathgeek747}
  19. {u§toratoritore}
  20. {uÂ§Â§ÇšÏÏ‰ÎŸÎ»ÂŁÎŒÄŠÎŠÏ†â‰ˆâ‚ŹÆÎŸĂŸĂĂ†Ă˜Îž}
  21. {u§Theotherwhitemeat}
  22. {u§Martinultima}
  23. {u§Manforman}
  24. Nom and For this thing is damn funny, and funny.--User:Silicson§silicson 14:56, 3 January 2009 (UTC)

§againstnumber=5 §against=

  1. Against... Are you kidding me? What's funny about this? It's a kakun-pun, at best. --{User:MoneySign/sig} 15:29, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  2. NEG-A-TIVE. Technically, it's already been featured via VFH (as the thumbnail,) but I agree with MoneySign (shock!) that it's little more than a pun, and a weak one outside the context of its parent article. --{User:King In Yellow/sig} 16:11, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  3. Small Against. It's Mhaille. I'm alergic. --{User:Acid Ammo/sig} 22:03, 3 August 2006 (UTC)
  4. Against Shouldn't it be Potatochip? User:FreeMorpheme§FreeMorpheme 11:34, 7 August 2006 (UTC)
  5. {u§Bradaphraser}

§comments=Featured Same score as the Super Soaker one, but this one gets the nod because it's older. {user:Rcmurphy/sig} 05:02, 17 August 2006 (UTC) }}


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


BePrepared.png

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


Noobaward.png

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


Martinultima’s Scratchboard
In the same vein as Slate Industry in Wales:

“Postage stamps of Ireland are the postage stamps issued by the postal authority of the independent Irish state.”

~ Captain Obvious on Wikipedia's featured article on August 14, 2007

Get Franklinstein here VFP-ready:
Franklinstein-signing-detail.jpg

And get Franklinstein here VFH-ready...
My Latest Articles
Benjamin Franklinstein PEE VFH
Jolt Cola PEE -
Complete Bibliography
8/3/2007 Benjamin Franklinstein – Norelco, you betrayed me! Time for plan B...
7/22/2007 Norelco (obviously this is a personal favorite now)
7/21/2007 UnNews:J.K. Rowling reveals title for Harry Potter 8! (been waiting to post this since 2005!)
Not my best, but apparently VFH'd anyway. Kudos to User:Sonic80 for being my one supporter here. Note that that bit about Homer Simpson (and, well, that other thing) was not my idea, but oh well. Oh, and screw you, Michael Gerber.
7/4/2007 Benjamin Franklinstein
7/4/2007 Jolt Cola (rewrite)
Includes Image:Benjamin Franklinstein.jpg
7/3/2007 Norelco – pee review, resubmit (philosophy + shaving? bad combination...)
Also comes with Image:Mona Lisa Razor.jpg and Image:Occam's Razor in Action.jpg, yours free with paid order!
6/26/2007 The Human Element – waiting for pee review
6/19/2007 Image:American idols got talent.png. I hate that show.
2/15/2007 Geocities (I think this is where I put in {{:Me}})
2/10/2007 National Federation of the Blond (started, but needs a lot more blond jokes)
2/9/2007 UnNews:National Federation of the Blond: "Dye your hair, you're in danger!"
2/5/2007 Image:Thyspace.png (for Thyspace)
2/5/2007 Captain Omnipotent (section: Weaknesses + pic)
1/18/2007 Jolt Cola
1/16/2007 UnNews:Scientist experimenting on coffee arrested for blowing up universe
6/3/2006 Minimalist talk page
6/3/2006 Deep Note
3/4/2006 Geocities (really crappy original version)
1/9/2006 I Fucking Hate the Bermuda Triangle (added line: ships and planes...with chips on plates)
11/30/2005 Celine Dionide
11/20/2005 Image:Palpatines guide to facial care.jpg
11/3/2005 UnPoetia:Norbert Percy Tangleknickers
Articles Images WTF?