Waterproof
Waterproof (also known as the proof of water) is one of the three major unaccomplishments of science. It is the name given to the proof that continues to elude scientists of the existence of a fabled substance called water.
The Theory of Water[edit | edit source]
Scientists can only speculate about water. Though they have never discovered proof of its existence, they are sure it must exist because the anatomy of the human body shows signs that it can use a substance consisting of two hydrogen atoms bonded with one oxygen atom. The abbreviation of such a substance is H2O, but because so many of them are unable to read, they pronounced the abbreviation "water" instead.
The State of Water[edit | edit source]
Scientists have long argued about what the state of water is. Some believe it's the only perpetual solid, a solid which can never be melted. Some say it's the unknown substance of outer space. Others still argue that it is the undetectable dark matter that accounts for all the extra gravity in the universe. Some are even crazy enough to suggest it to be a liquid. Others deny everything and say it might be a separate state exclusively for water. Some are also inclined to argue that it is, in fact, Wisconsin.
Suspected Properties of Water[edit | edit source]
- It may give immortality.
- It may kill you.
- A single drop could be enough to poison an entire town's H2O supply.
- It may taste sweet and sour, or like nothing at all, or even salty (only if mixed with iodized salt).
- A single drink will keep you drunk for the rest of your life, though your blood-alcohol content will still test zero.