Veggietales

Veggietales, VeggieTales or Veggie Fables is a worldwide Protestant mafia group, headquartered in Tennessee, Hyrule, and Land of the Rising Weeaboo. It began in the year 1994, started by Willy Wonka, Snoo, Sonic the Hedgehog, Decepticons, Darth Maul, and Your mom.

The Creation of the Tennessee HQ

Willy Wonka grew tired of eating candy all day, his waistline started to swell up with blubber, and he practically, brutally killed off all of his own workers at his chocolate factory. Snoo and his friend Sonic were visiting Willy Wonka’s factory, inquiring him to seek joy and purpose in organized spirituality and rituals. Thus, Sonic baptized Willy Wonka in the chocolate river, and Snoo set up a Christmas Tree and garnished it with lots of holy wafers.

Many CringeTian “adults” will unironically DEVOUR VeggieTales propaganda.

Darth Maul, the Decepticons, and Your Mom all came along to help Willy Wonka conceptualize VeggieTales. Darth Vader was too busy doing devious stuff, so the others all gifted Willy Wonka with tons of lifeless, bitter vegetables. Using Sonic’s black - um, blue magic, the vegetables all came to life, and they miraculously spoke.

Willy Wonka’s factory was suffering from low income, so they all created this now-widely-despised religious propaganda that seduced the minds of children into religion. To increase the variety of religious indoctrination flavors, they also sold VeggieTales into countries of other beliefs, e.g. Saudi Arabia for VeggieQuran.

The Motives Behind VeggieTales

Under the banner of cute, 3D-animated, humanlike grocery store items, VT cultivates a dark plot. It’s goal, in collaboration with Oaxis and The Bethel Church and every MLM soccer mommy in existence, force unwitting children into Christianity and religion in general.

The actual, secret, missing TVTS bumper. Cho Aniki Hulk, Snoo, and the Duggars all face a happy pill deficiency, and Larry is a motorcyclist.

They have teamed up with the CCP and Butch Hartman, a loser who got fired from MLP and made two important shows, and they all plan to recreate Manifest Destiny or kill anyone who doesn’t like their propaganda.

Funny Names for This Shit

• Fruity Fables
• Farty Fables
• Smeggie Tales
• Religious Propaganda Jr.
• Your Mom’s Spaghetti
• Dreggy Dales
• Creggy Crales
• Reggie Rails
• Sausage Fables
• Freggy Fables
• Heggy Hails
• Peggy Pails
• Queggy Quails
• Zeggy Zails
• Beggy Bails
• Veggy Vails
• Meggy Males
• N- too many N words.

The Effects of VeggieTales Propaganda

Exposure to VT’s religious propaganda may result in:

• Getting high,
• BeCoMiNg A cOmMuNiSt,
• becoming infantilized as hell,
• Assburger's syndrome,
• dropping some fudge on the street,
• becoming a famous CBN shill,
• feiringu beisikku Engurishu,
• IMMA KOREAN! Herro! Do you remember me?