User talk:The Ninja
This article is stupid. You can help Uncyclopedia by whacking it upside the head with a clue-by-four.
“The Ninja could save humanity, then again, The Ninja probably couldn't.But I wouldn't doubt him, she'll most likely come through in the end.”
~ Oscar Wilde on The Ninja
“The Ninja ain't got nothing on This Ninja”
~ That Ninja on The Ninja
“..I maintain that although cheddar is highly classy among their folk, mozzarella is far more ninja like.It's the cheese of Ninjas!”
~ A hardcore fan of The Ninja on The particular flavour of cheese The Ninja prefers
“Never saw him coming.I did see her leaving though.”
~ Synyster Gates on The night his trademark hat was supposedly "kidnapped"
“Skilled, The Ninja is. Much training, Yoda needs.Speech impediment fixed, also, Yoda needs”
~ Yoda on The Ninja owning his ass
“Why do I feel like I just sold my soul to a monkey?”
~ The Ninja Herself on Joining her sworn "Enemy-again, Friend-again"
“She did it!! I saw the whole thing!!”
~ That famous one-eyed ninja guy on his missing fruity-looking eyepatch
“You've got me to thank for this.”
~ God on The Ninja
“I'd tap that.If I knew what that was.If it didn't look that great, then I might not tap that.”
~ Sasuke Uchiha on his bizzare fanboyism of The Ninja
“ The Ninja requests you read warnings and crackhead labels at beginning of article, as well as others in page.If at any time feel afraid and have wet self, The Ninja recommend you spend time stare at other page.Warnings in place for reader safety after all, not The Ninja.”
~ The Ninja's official SpokesNinja
my mood ring |
nervous emotions mixed unsettled cool |
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If you see this template it means thats everybody cares about you, Even this template cares about you. May Baby Jesus smile at you forever because you are so beautiful. |
This article is hilarious if you are familiar with whatever it pretends to explain, but otherwise you probably have no idea what the hell is going on. If you can think of a way to make it more accessible, make it so.
This article is insane. The article submitter may need psychotherapy, and as such, this article should be taken as gospel. You can help Uncyclopedia by restraining the article in a rubber room. |
WARNING: In accordance with the OMG U SRS???// act of 2002, all contents of this page are to be believed with no disputes whatsoever. (Hey, morons voted for Bush.) |
About The Ninja[edit source]
This page was written by The Ninja Official SpokesNinja, as The Ninja has been too busy to edit and manage this page.
The Ninja is quite obviously Canadian. However, The Ninja also obviously not.The Ninja will say this, she is female, unless disguise required for mission.The Ninja knows this page isn't humorous as can be, but ninjas aren't always funny.Please help The Ninja,reader probably know more about her than she does!
The author of this article does not give a flying fuck if you edit it – heck, your stuff is probably funnier than theirs. |
The Ninja leads relatively peaceful life of violence.Then again, The Ninja possibly co-exists in violent lifestyle of peace.It's not particularily certain.She not Japanese, contrary to unpopular belief.The Ninja is currently being stalked and lusted after by none other than ghastly creature of abyss Rock Lee.The Ninja is also notgrue.
She reportedly survived grue attack and lived, if only with major occasional insanity, leading many believe she 1337, and others believe she n00b.
“ I'm only going to say this once. I am not a n00b.”
~ The Ninja
The Ninja maintains love of cheese, anime and manga, among other things.The Ninja hates subjects of geography and mathematics, and has love of music, art and the like.She is fan of Avenged Sevenfold and possesses hoodie, t-shirt with band's logos, and hat in style of those worn by Synyster Gates.
She once accused stealing Synyster Gates' actual hat, but was later determined not be The Ninja, but enemy of The Ninja posing as her.The poseur made fatal mistake not wear pants during heist and was identified, as The Ninja exclaimed during event,"Pantsless and guilty!". Thus, she released and cleared of all charge and accusation, since, we all know The Ninja wear pants.Quite stylish ones at that.
The pants the robber abandoned before the robbery have left this stylish piece of denim:
The Ninja also adds that she knows who the real criminal behind the "Pantsless Un-Robbery" was, his general location, and that he can't hide forever.
On other note, The Ninja is not taking calls on supposed relation to one Mayuu Isaria. She appalled by such reference, and add she goes by other numerous name now ,and that fans need keep up with times.
Relations, other info, etc.[edit source]
The Ninja no relation to That Ninja, who in turn not related to This Ninja.This Ninja claims no relation to This Ninja, and so forth.
The Ninja has listed following criteria and personal info.This is normally again ninja regulations, but in this case they made exception.Anyone who crosses her path wrong way and such, can expect mild, ownage. Those who piss her off, use pickup lines on her, engage battle with her, or grope, touch, poke, tickle, squirt ketchup at, mime bad ninja actions, parade around in knight costume near her may experience severe, numbing, agonizing pwnage.
Name:(not released)
Age:(possibly teen, therefore a prodigy)
Height:(video evidence shows indication of possible height in 5 foot range)
Location: (not released)
Phone Number: (DEFINATLY not released)
“It should also be noted I have a rare disorder known as a Knight Hating Complex. This means serious pain/anguish/emotionally scarring/death/catapulting etc, on most knights I come across.Coincidentally, this complex means when I see a knight, an alter-ego inside of me come out, beats up the knight, then we switch back, I don't know what's happened.Then I see the destruction and it all comes back to me.I contracted it after breaking up with a knight, and so, I try to avoid any missions involving knights, for my identity's sake as well as the media.It's a shame and often embarrassing when meeting new people, especially blonde knights; they seem to get the worse damage.You walk into the coffee shop and you're standing in line for your ice-capp, when the guy in the line next to you says "Hi.". Then you turn and look, and see he's blonde, with blue eyes, dressed in medieval wear and chainmail.Five minutes later, the coffee shop is pretty much floored and demolished, there's a cowering knight in the corner, and here I am, standing here holding a steaming half-spilt pot of coffee in one hand, a dagger in the other, and there's shrapnel everywhere! True story, no lies!”
~ The Ninja on HerKnight Hating Complex
DANGER!! Viewing this page could be deadly ... or worse. 21,006 users are currently castrated, paralyzed, infected with Herpes, and/or disfigured. If you just got here and are feeling dizzy or you lost a pint of blood from the stump where your arm used to be, please stumble away and call for help, lay down in the gutter and pass out. |
Warning: The following text might contain spoilers.
This makes the article more aerodynamic, and thus more maneuverable at high speeds. Take caution and carry a first-aid kit at all times if you don't know that Little Orphan Ani is really Darth Vader, the colonel and Rosemary are actually Metal Gear Arsenal's AI, Luigi is Mr. L, the chick in The Crying Game is a dude, Laertes gets poisoned by his own sword, King Arthur and his knights are arrested for supposedly killing the historian, ending the movie before the final battle can start, the Bride's real name is Beatrix Kiddo, and her daughter is alive, DiZ dies when his machine self-destructs, Charlie Brown never talks to that red-headed girl, Austin Powers and Dr. Evil are brothers, Piggy and Simon both die, but Ralph and Jack are rescued, Dorian murders Basil and stabs his portrait, killing himself, and Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!!
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Not much else known about The Ninja,(as she will not release her former IRC nicknames (yes she used IRC for a time),or her appearance etc) other than she has dislike for knights.Immense dislike.
They've found us! Quick, run! Burn the evidence!
“The Ninja thank honourable person who read this information about The Ninja.The Ninja think you go now.Read other article.But find on own: The Ninja not leave links.Reader is honourable, but not enough for links.”
~ The Ninja's official SpokesNinja
This arc welder is a complete, irredeemable alpaca sandwich. The submitter is Bat Fuck Insane, ablates at the beard, and is an unfunny butt licker. If you seizure to dry this you will most explosively hear yourself. Or the submitter will jump your politician!!!!!! |
“ Yes sir-ee I am Bat Fuck Insane. I'm not ashamed and would not change a thing, mainly because the DeathBat is my favourite band's symbol and is a skull with wings of a likely insane bat.I'm wallpaperishly fried, why aren't you?”
~ The Ninja on Her Insanity