User talk:Featured User

Welcome!

Hello, Featured User, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for people like you:

• Beginner's Guide
• Our Vanity Policies - why we don't care about your friends
• How to be funny and not just stupid

If you read anything at all, make it the above three links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

• About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• How to get started editing on Uncyclopedia
• Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but it certainly is a fun and easy way to express your creativity. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:Featured User/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - onto it as well.

If the current colonization doesn't suit your fancy, then browse our rewrite and idea categories. We have lots of articles just sitting around for someone to improve, so don't be afraid - dive right in!

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. Again, welcome! 

-- PLEB SIR Lollipop (TALK) - updated on 3 September 2011, at 04:56

Hey dar

Glad to see you joined, you are that IP right? ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 04:59, September 3, 2011 (UTC)

Yes, indeed. The user page of my IP redirects to User:Featured User. Featured User 05:01, September 3, 2011 (UTC)

Yeah, about that. Read this please. -- PLEB SIR Lollipop (TALK) - updated on 3 September 2011, at 05:09

NOTM

	Noob of the Moment October 2011

-- KittyKitty (t) (c) 05:47, November 1, 2011 (UTC)

Signature Help

To do that, you need to create a sub-page first. For example, Try this User:Featured User/sig. I learned this from User:Magic Man. Check my sub-page : User:PopGoesTheWeasel/sig2 and see how I did it. Click edit and see what I typed. If you still need help - feel free to ask me or any other user. By the way, congratulations on being Noob Of The Month!

-- 05:01, November 22, 2011 (UTC)

There's more!

Forget my earlier message. This should help. If not, feel free to ask again! -- 05:10, November 22, 2011 (UTC)

Yes

Yes, I am nominated for Noob Of The Month too. Anyways, thanks for thanking me! -- 13:48, November 23, 2011 (UTC)

Hey man

Hope you're well. Just dropped by with a note about your Turkey Ball entry. While it looks extremely promising, I don't think you've entered it into the right category. The top category is for re-tellings of The Aristocrats joke, yours would probably be better off in the second one; which is for bad-taste articles, so you might want to move it. Anyway, good luck with the contest! --Black Flamingo 22:50, November 30, 2011 (UTC)

'S ok, Thekillerfroggy just moved it. Still, nice chatting to you. --Black Flamingo 23:07, November 30, 2011 (UTC)

Okay, that's good. Featured User 04:33, December 1, 2011 (UTC)

Nine Inch Nails

Ah. I'm going to be very gentle here - as you're a n00b. This happens to be a band I have a strong affection for. Band articles tend to be shit - either you like the band, and in which case you are too nice on them, or you dislike them, and end up being too harsh. That being said, what makes for a fantastic article is parody. The framework (in this case Uncyclopedia) is a parody of another famous wiki. The best articles are a parody of the subject matter. (And here I will suggest reading HTBFANJS if you haven't read it yet.

What makes an article poor is:

1. Randumbo (Humour based on bullshit rather than fact)
2. Cliché (Hitler, Chuck Norris, grues, etc.)
3. Lack of cohesiveness (when an article jumps around with no real structure)

Why I say this is that I had a few ideas for an article on NIN that I eventually didn't use as I don't have the guts to do a band article. Having said that, there is enough ridiculous in NIN that can be held up to ridicule. For instance:

1. The Halo stuff (there are around 17 Halo releases, including singles, albums and EPs. For a band with only a handful of studio albums, this is a little absurd)
2. The 900 million bootleg/remix albums
3. The broken videos (which I am never going to show my parents, my lover, or my kids, but I love.)
4. The Marilyn Manson creation and abandon (The guys real name is Brent Warner. He sounds like the AV club geek that got beat up regularly)

You have the germ of a good article. It needs work to make it great. Admittedly, this is only an opinion, but I'd suggest rewrite it, and put it up for PEE review. And I apologise if I sound critical - I can see promise in what you have done, but it needs work. Trust me, there is more than one shit article I have written, but there is some good stuff that came later - mainly because I listened to the advice of the old timers here. Pup 01:31 10 Dec '11

Late to respond to this comment, but okay, I'll do this stuff. 21:40, December 11, 2011 (UTC)

Watch out, it's sharp!

Way to go, now go get a girlfriend. -- 02:15, December 12, 2011 (UTC)

Thanks for the star. 03:57, December 12, 2011 (UTC)