UnNews:Afroman announces VP in successful campaign

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Monday, May 13, 2024

BALTIMORE, Maryland - Over a year after filing for being a candidate for the "Twenty Twenty Fro" presidential election, Grammy-winning singer, songwriter, and criticizer of whack rap, Afroman, has finally stated that he would reveal his vice president. He is now travelling to Maryland to convince people there to vote for him. In a poll published earlier this very month, the "Because I Got High" creator was surpassing the two primary partisan candidates Donald Trump and Sleepy Joe. This has caused the former candidate to release his first actual tweet on Twitter X, after being welcomed back by Elon Musk.

See how successful his campaign is already.
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@realDonaldTrump
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Black men are invading our country and the woke press are ignoring it! If you want to save this country and be a true American patriot, vote for ME! #TrumpFor2024
4:42 AM - 13 May 2024
Twitter reply.png      Twitter retweet.png 3,799    Twitter heart.png 10,547

Afroman responded to this tweet by telling us in this exclusive interview, that he had picked the famous White rapper Eminem to be his vice president. Afroman himself said that the reason why he picked Eminem was because "that wigga gonna help me win in the Midwest and Northeast. Afroman also noted that "Enimem knows where dat meth is due to his momma." In support for Afroman's campaign, Eminem also told his fans that he was making a new album, which would show what would happen if any other candidates were to win. It is expected to release in mid-2024 with the RIAA's full approval.

Additionally, Afroman has created a website to showcase his eleven talking points. It can be found here. As this is sponsored news, we'll bother you with it regardless.

The list[edit | edit source]

  1. Cannabis is legal now!
  2. People on drugs will be free!
  3. Policemen will be watched by Big Brother.
  4. Fuck the world, except when we exploit them.
  5. No AID, Only AIDS!
  6. No taxes! Everyone gets refunds![1]
  7. Peace, dude
  8. More sports. But ONLY American football.
  9. Prostitution is legal now!
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Did you know? that Afroman has known where you, your family, and your friends have lived in since you were born?

So now vote for Afroman, or else he'll make you go high. Do you really want that? Otherwise, he'll also get the Feds to arrest you for smuggling cocaine.

Sources[edit | edit source]

Notes[edit | edit source]

  1. ↑ Gotta get them Ancaps somehow.
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