T-pose
“Pootis”
“It is only slightly dangerous”
The T-Pose (also known as the reference pose, or the A-Pose for those who are dyslexic) is a pose used to assert dominance over lesser beings. It was invented by God himself and is restricted to deities only. If one attempts to use the T-pose as a non-deity, they will either asplode or be kicked from the server for cheating.
Etymology[edit | edit source]
This pose has gone through many different names. Originally, it started as the "Cross Pose" in reference to the Cross. However, the creators of this name got cancelled by the public (and as such we are legally required to not mention their names). It evolved into T-Pose, referring to the T-shape made. Someone also decided to call it "A-Pose" but he was sent to a mental hospital for the rest of his life due to not being able to tell the clear shape of a T. When the "T-Pose Epidemic" begun, people began calling it "THE Pose" in order to avoid causing post-traumatic stress disorder in any unfortunate victims. Saying this was referred to as "Referring to the pose" and eventually evolved into the "Reference pose", which is the name used by academics and other nerds.
History[edit | edit source]
The reference pose was created in 10000 BC by God, who wanted to assert dominance over the primitive cavemen of the time period. At first, he was unsure how he would do so. Although he could have killed everyone easily due to his 69 million power in Rise of Kingdoms, he realized it would be more fun to show them he was much stronger than them with his overpowered pose, and THEN kill everyone. The entire human race almost went extinct due to God reference posing and causing the human race to be deleted.
Due to the humans being too dead to record the supposed "evil beast killing everyone with the sheer display of his dominance", the T-pose did not appear again until the U.S. Civil War when soldiers discovered the power of the reference pose to blow up the entirety of the other army. Battles grew very short in length due to soldiers abusing the punishment of "T-posing when not a deity" to blow up both armies simultaneously. As a result, it again went unrecorded by the majority of historians. Few survivors were left by the mass destruction of the battles, but they were dismissed as insane.
It was not until the era of computers that the T-pose had returned. Unlike before, people realized the easiest way to build a human in a computer was to take a picture of themselves reference posing, and then tell the computer to make it into a three-dimensional shape. This lead to a lot of supposed "bombing" incidents caused by the flawed method for creating humans in the computer. Internet trolls who witnessed the event documented it on several web forums, and soon the "T-pose Epidemic" of 1993 began. It is rumored that over 9000 casualties had occurred as a result of the epidemic, and it is still continuing to today.
Notable Cases[edit | edit source]
- It was rumored that World War II was started because Hitler saw a deity T-posing. He witnessed the power of the deity flying and became angry for the rest of his life.
- The eruption of Pompeii was caused because a man being executed via volcano decided that he would bring everyone down with him and reference posed, causing the volcano to erupt due to his massive asplosion. This is evidenced by a charred reference posing skeleton found in the volcano.
- Satan once attempted the power of the reference pose and blew up the entire universe. Then God made a new one.
Study of the T-Pose[edit | edit source]
The "T-Pose epidemic" lead scientists to investigate the cause of Reference Pose induced asplosions. It was revealed that the equation of the chance of someone reference posing and asploding was
Scientists stopped studying the reference pose in order to avoid turning the conspiracy theorists against them, which would result in nuclear war and the extinction of all "lesser human beings."
Use of T-Pose by Deities[edit | edit source]
The reference pose has historically been used by deities to show dominance over other, pathetic lifeforms. Notable examples include every occurrence of a supposed "nuclear bomb" (These are illegal according to several deities and have been replaced with a worthless, low-tier deity reference posing and blowing up the entirety of x location, along with themselves), anybody who can fly, and anybody who has fired their lazor.
There is also evidence that reference posing of deities has caused wars. Deities do enjoy to watch the puny humans fight, and reference posing has been supposedly "scientifically proven" to cause aggression in humans, and will cause mass wars over stupid things. This scientific proof, however, is rumored to have also been created by scientists and conspiracy theorists and the public does not believe this information.
The T-pose can also influence extreme weather. Several towns have reported sightings of a deity reference posing and summoning 6000 tornadoes, large chunks of hail, floods, etc.
This has also been alluded to in obviously fake internet copypastas, such as "Timmy saw God reference posing and he asploded at 3 am. Post this in 5 other places or the same will happen to you!" These are easy to notice because they have factually incorrect information. In this example, Timmy did not asplode immediately when he saw God reference pose, unlike historical evidence has shown.
T-Pose in Popular Culture[edit | edit source]
Several popular video games have referenced the reference pose, particularly as a secret "feature" that can be triggered by deleting certain "necessary" components of the game. This unlocks a new ability where your character can perform the reference pose and become permanently invincible. Other games have other methods to trigger this, such as spamming random buttons, or, in some games, using the built-in "command console".
"Glitching into" or otherwise using the reference pose, however, typically carries negative comments by the community. Some gamers regard those who attempt to use the reference pose as "griefers" who must be kicked from the game. Others will pray to those who make their in-game characters reference pose. Although reference posing in real life tends to result in instantaneous death, video game characters can do whatever they want, and that includes all of the previously mentioned powers of the reference pose without requiring the usage of the reference pose.
Some gamers have felt controversy over inclusion of the reference pose after Timmy, an 8 year old child, violently asploded in his house after reference posing while his in-game character was doing the reference pose. This has resulted in the reference pose being widely removed from more recent games.
The hit video game Fortnite once added the T-pose as an emote, but this caused a second reference pose epidemic. It was quickly removed and Fortnite was fined $8,207,352,890,357 by the FBTPP, or the Federal Bureau of T-Pose Prevention.
Outside of gaming, the reference pose has seldom been mentioned. This is likely due to the fact that gamers do not have empathy, unlike other major industries. This has been evidenced in several major online games, where chat largely consists of raging gamers saying every swear word and slur in existence (because their team sucks) and trolls doing the same (because they think it's funny). Such game chat usually consists of:
[jimmy9001]: Your skill is NOTHING!
[jimmy9001]: You serve ZERO PURPOSE!
[jimmy9001]: You should **** ********... NOW!
[mrtrollman]: haha **********
Gamers who enjoy memes typically create memes based on the reference pose. Some of the most famous include "You should reference pose yourself... NOW!" (typically said by angry gamers) and "What an hero, to reference pose for us that day" (referring to the reference posing of Timmy)
