Forum:Ask the crazy homeless guy outside of the 7-11
Crazy homeless guy told me to tell you all the ground rules:
- Please use a level 2 headline to describe the subject of your question. For example, if it's about a bad relationship, use the headline ==Bad relationship==
- Please follow the first rule so as to distinguish between each question.
Thanks! -- 
08:33, 23 March 2008 (UTC)
Let the questions begin!
mumble mumble... WHAT?! WHADDYA WANT?! --Crazy homeless guy
Weird-smelling feces
Why do my bowel movements smell like sunshine? --Sir Starnestommy 
(Talk • Contribs • CUN) 10:42, Mar. 23, 2008
You have a tumor thats pressing on your olfactory gland makig things smell different to how they nrmally would, jusdgeing fomr the severty of the changes consult a morticain--Sycamore (Talk) 10:54, 23 March 2008 (UTC)
Dear Starnestommy,
FLAAAAAKES! FLAAAAAAKES!!!!! THEY'RE COMIN' FOR US, I TELL, YA! THEY ARE! THERE ARE GODDAMN ALIENS IN THEM GODDAMN SNOWFLAKES!!! FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!!! SHOW YOUR TITS! --Crazy homeless guy
Why...
...Should I ask the homeless guy in front of 7-11 when I could ask the homeless guy in front of Wal-Mart instead? --THE 15:53, 23 March 2008 (UTC)
Dear THE,
FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU GIMME SOME CHANGE! I SAID, DO YOU HEAR ME? FUCK YOU! I NEED A NEW SHOE, GODDAMMIT! WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS?! 12 CENTS?! YOU GODDAMN ARAB CHINK! FUCK! DON'T YOU READ THE BIBLE, GODDAMMIT?! THERE ARE ALIENS IN THEM FUCKING SNOWFLAKES!!! --Crazy homeless guy
Reader's Digest
Dear Homeless Guy,
Why are none of the anecdotes that people send in to Reader's Digest funny? -
Heck no techno | chitchat | stuff.. 
20:52, 23 March 2008 (UTC)
Dear Heck no techno,
GOD IS GOING TO JUDGE US ALL! HE JUDGED MY SOCK!!! MY SOCK IS IN HELL!!! MY SOCK BETRAYED JESUS AND ASPARAGUS!!! DOES YOU ARE HEARING MY WORDS I'M SAYING?!?! THE JUDGMENT TIME IS NEARING CLOSELY! FUCK FUCK FUCK! FUCKING FUCK! HE SENT THE FLAKES HERE TO DAMN US TO... SHITFUCK! SOMEBODY STOLE MY FUCKIN' SACK OF SHIT! --Crazy homeless guy
- I understand it now...
Heck no techno | chitchat | stuff.. 
22:24, 23 March 2008 (UTC)
Hey...
Not you again! You bum! Scoot! *Hits Crazy Homeless Guy with a broom* If I ever see you round here again I'm callin' the cops, ya hear? --7-11 Manager 00:06, 24 March 2008 (UTC)
Dear 7-11 Manager,
BUT THE CLOWN! THE CLOWN IS HERE! HE BROUGHT-- HEY, HE BROUGHT US THE MAGIC FISH! GET YOUR FUCKIN' HANDS OFF ME! GODDAMMIT, DON'T YOU KNOW JESUS HATES YOU!? FUCKIN! THAT'S WHY WE LOST IN 'NAM, YOU KNOW?! JESUS WAS FIGHTING FOR CHARLIE, I FUCKIN' SAW HIM WITH MY OWN TWO EYES! WHAT THE FUCK YOU... GODDAMN! --Crazy homeless guy 00:28, 24 March 2008 (UTC)
Attention homeless guy
This is the police. Please, pull your pants up, put your hands at your sides, and slowly walk into a highly combustible area. We will take care of the rest. Please note that failure to comply will result in a painful and highly unwarranted tasing. --Officer Callahan 00:42, 24 March 2008 (UTC)
Dear Officer Callahann,
[proceeds to urinate all over his own feet] --Crazy homeless guy 05:46, 24 March 2008 (UTC)
Homeless food?
Dear homeless guy, why do hobos taste so good? - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon 
(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 00:44, Mar 24
Dear TheLedBalloon,
JESUS FOUGHT FOR CHARLIE! JESUS FOUGHT FOR CHARLIE! JESUS FOUGHT FOR CHARLIE! JESUS FOUGHT FOR CHARLIE! JESUS FOUGHT FOR CHARLIE! JESUS FOUGHT FOR CHARLIE! --Crazy homeless guy 05:47, 24 March 2008 (UTC)
WTF R U Doin?
My mommy doesn't let me do that with mine... --Clueless 10 year old 03:59, 24 March 2008 (UTC)
Shooting Web
How do I shot web? --Sir Starnestommy (Talk • Contribs • CUN) 11:01, Mar. 24, 2008
But the lampshades...
Why hasn't the marmalade festered underneath the blue stench of the lampshades? Isshiki Kotonashi 01:26, 26 March 2008 (UTC)
i can haz cheezburger?
For great justice, launch all Zigs? - 
Admiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate 
01:29, 26 March 2008 (UTC)
- You make bunny cry. Isshiki Kotonashi 01:42, 26 March 2008 (UTC)
Is fur really...
...the mind-killer? Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 13:23, 26 March 2008 (UTC)