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로동신문에 오신 것을 환영합네다! the official party-controlled newspaper of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.

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Today's Party Column


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The Apollo 15 Moon mission took place in 1971 at a time before real computers. One phase of the mission was Lunar Launch and docking with the command-module, Endeavor. This simple to imagine procedure is elaborately explained by Wikipedia in the following sentence:

“After the 'Apollo 15' Lunar Module 'Falcon' lifted from the Moon’s surface it docked with the Apollo Command-Service-Module, 'Endeavor'."

Amazingly easy! According to Wikipedia there is only the word "it" between 'surface' and 'docked'. But what actually transpired from Lunar launch until docking? What exactly is "it"? Did it take only one split second to launch back into orbit, get going 110 Kilometers per second (396,000 KPH?), then catch-up and dock safely with Endeavor in the empty vacuum of outer space? Sure, and bears shit in the Vatican.

In the late 1970s Apollo 15 crew members, Dave Scott and Jim Irwin, wrote a book on the experience titled, "If We Had Done It". The book created a sensation at NASA, and became a best seller. Later, both Scott and Irwin had their families kidnapped, and, under extreme duress, they publicly retracted this version. But it remains an underground classic.

In 1990, after reading the book, and realizing the great potential of a "Lunar Launch" film, director Stanley Kubrick bought the rights to the detailed story and interviewed the astronauts involved. A script was created, and a extremely diverse cast was assembled by Kubrick to satisfy his weird sense of humor and add ample surrealism. The cast was selected based on the three performers' innate natural characteristics and leading character portrayals. The result is quite interesting. (Full article...)

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Party members of the month

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

You now only have 3, god dammit, 3 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

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