Babel:Nk

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로동신문에 오신 것을 환영합네다! the official party-controlled newspaper of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.

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Today's Party Column


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Curious George is the protagonist in a series of popular children's books by the same name, written by Hans Aloveryer and his wife Bernard. The books feature a bi-curious chimpanzee named George, who is brought from his home in Africa by The Man With The PVC Gimp Mask to live with him in his cellar.

Although in the illustrations George does not correspond exactly to any non-fictional species of monkey, it is believed by many that he is in fact a bonobo, a species known to be the sexiest of the great apes.

Our first view of George sees him living free and happy within a commune in North Africa, where he performs for money to passing tourists. One day a group of swarthy-looking men buy him drinks, and after a short time he wakes up with a burlap bag over his head. After a lengthy sea voyage George finds himself living in a cellar in New York, where he gets into a number of jolly japes with a selection of visitors to his dungeon. (Full article...)

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Today's hangul word is
deity
Use this word to awe your enemies.

Today in the DPRK


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Rodong Sinmun, page 2


It is an irreputable fact...

  • ... that Freddie Mercury was banned in some European countries due to his extremely radioactive last name?

You cannot deny...[edit source]

  • ... that I just had sex, and hey do you got any napkins?


More wisdom

Party members of the month

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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