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Benjamin Netanyahu

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Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu.

All rise for the bat fuck insane Prime Minister of Israel, Mr. Benjamin Netanyahu.

Netanyahu had many travels.

Travel I: A Voyage to Uganda

4 July 1976

Netanyahu travelled to Uganda in 1976 to rescue his little brother Jonathan from Idi Amin. The operation failed, but Netanyahu did manage to save one little lamb which was going to become Amin's lunch later that day. The lamb was eventually eaten by Ariel Sharon, as documented in the movies Waltz with Bashir and The Silence of the Lambs.

Travel II: A Voyage to Bloodhoundgang

30 July 1976 – 3 July 1996
Benjamin Netanyahu's friend, the Ukrainian President.

During that period of time, Netanyahu was travelling to several ex-USSR countries, in order to save the Israeli flag from being urinated on during a Bloodhound Gang tour. The mission failed though he did manage to save a Libyan flag from getting totally covered with snot, and take a picture with Vladimir Putin.

Travel III: A Voyage to Mcdonalds, Redlobster, Anheuserbusch, Haagendazs and Japan

5 August 1996 – 16 April 2010

During the 20th and 21st centuries, Netanyahu had travelled to many known and less-known countries, in order to establish positive relations between them and Israel. Today, the only country constantly supporting Israel in the United Nations is the Floating Turd of Turdistan, ruled by Netanyahu's good friend Pizza the Hut.

Travel IV: A Voyage to the Land of the Splatsploutsploushes

7 September 2010 – 5 December 2015
My last visit to Planet Hoomoos.

On the most recent travel, Netanyahu visited the lovely Splatsploutsploushes and their charming friends, the Yahoods. The Splatsploutsploushes are human-like beings, with brown skins and a habit to wear towels over their heads. The Yahoods are also humanoids with beards and a strange round piece of cloth over their heads. Yahoods and Splatsploutsploushes seem to be in a constant state of conflict, as they can't agree who's hoomoos is better; hoomoos seems to be some kind of mousse made of horse sperm, and the Yahoods keep digging for it in their vast hoomoos mines. Splatsploutsploushes seem much less enthused by the hoomoos, as they have more advanced climbing skills, and thus more access to quality hoomoos. On the other hand, the Yahoods, who have to dig for the hoomoos, cannot accept the Splatsploutsploushes' claim on the hoomoos as their official food. Netanyahu was deeply impressed by the texture and aroma of the hoomoos, and promises to return to the Land of the Splatsploutsploushes soon.

See also

  • Vladimir Putin, Benjamin Netanyahu's friend, the Russian President.
  • Donald Trump, Benjamin Netanyahu's friend, the American President.
  • Kim Jong-un, another batshit insane world leader who's friends with Putin and Trump
  • Dictator, which is what all batfuck insane leaders are, aside from your mom.