User:VelairWight

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For those obsessed with the so-called experts, VelairWight also has a userpage on the English Wikipedia.

Facts about me

ow 3 This user has already read all of Oscar Wilde's works. Twice. And has his picture over their bed. ow 3

sc P This fucker speaks Scrabble heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy. sc P

en N This user is a native speaker of English. en N

rh 4 This user speaks Random Humour at a near-native level. rh 4

“I'm going to fucking bury that guy, I have done it before, and I will do it again, I'm going to fucking kill VelairWight.”

~ Steve Ballmer on VelairWight

Oops! Were you looking for the expletive version of my user page?

This is about me

In real life, I am an 18-year old (turned 18 on April 21) high school student that graduated from high school on May 22. I did manage to get on Steve Ballmer's hitlist for no reason. Same with that loon Oprah. I'm black!

Pages I created

• Tony La Russa
• Ken Griffey Jr. Presents Major League Baseball
• John Elway
• Jackson's Adventure
• Dan Kolb
• Animaniacs
• Tennessee Williams

Templates I created

• Silly NBA template

This list is quicky budding. More will come when I have the patience and time to make more loony and non-factual pages. This is so hard to do.

People

Here are my friends and enemies I made in my 18 years when I was alive.

Friends

• Tony La Russa
• The Pope
• Oscar Wilde
• Somebody I can't think of a name, insert name here
• The Man with No Name
• Terry Francona

Enemies

• Barbariccia
• Steve Ballmer
• League of X-Traordinary people
• Darth Mario
• Satan's Puppet
• The gateway to Hell

Sports Teams (that most don't even exist)

Spades News

• St. Louis Cardinals - signed IF Bill Cosby to a one year, $600,000 contract. Signed second baseman Simon Belmont to a four year, $7.65 contract. Signed right fielder The Blank to a three year, eleventy billion dollar contract.
• St. Louis WTFs - signed Your mom to a lifetime contract. Signed Marc Bulger to a $5 contract.

Note: none of these players are factual, except Your mom.

I PITY THE FOO' THAT WROTE THIS CRAP!           Someone help this sucka of a page by rewriting it. NOW!

Seems like I didn't get Mr. T's seal of approval... --The Insane Velair Wight 23:42, 28 June 2006 (UTC)