Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Isaac Newton
Isaac Newton[edit source]
Just want to know if it is VFH-worthy, and how to fix it if it isn't, of course. -- artificial Ape (subtract) (Riot Porn) 19:48, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
This article is under review by <font-weight:bold>Gerry Cheevers. Sayeth Gerry: shotgun!! |
i assume by your comment that you're looking for a review on the short side. as such, i'll keep my comments fairly brief.
Humour: | 7.5 | average of all humor score
a really good start, but i feel like it's too short. throw another two sentences on there, at least, to capture the reader's attention a little bit more.
again, i feel like it might be just a tad short, but i really do like the content.
this is another good section, but the length just isn't gonna cut it. expand here with more stories of his school years.
this section was great, but you kind of tailed off at the end with the leibniz part. i think you could come up with a funnier backstory than 'leibniz showed newton how to use calculus'.
a solid ending, i like it a lot. wow, that's the first humor 9 i've given out in quite some time! |
Concept: | 8.5 | 5/5 points for a well-known subject worthy of parody. yay physics!
3.5/5 points for execution. i like the apple theme quite a bit, but i'd like to see more expansion of the shorter sections. |
Prose and formatting: | 7.5 | i had trouble reading some sentences and had to go back to read them again. i suggest running this article by UN:PS. everything seemed stuck on the right side of your article, almost like gravity pulled it over there. switch an image to the left side for balance. other than that your formatting and sections pleased me. |
Images: | 5 | i think this is the weak point of your article. your images are basically the same, although the captions do work nicely. see final comments. |
Miscellaneous: | 7.2 | ave'd. |
Final Score: | 35.7 | my preview button tells me that your score is 35.7, placing you right at the 'adequate' level. however, this article is close to VFH-worthy. currently, i would probably abstain on this article on the grounds that it doesn't feel 'finished'. if you extend the shorter sections, add another picture (apple-related, methinks), and clean it up in general, i would most certainly vote for, and i even look forward to nomming this article should it improve satisfactorally. if you need anything else, don't hesitat to pick up the Gerryphone and dial 30. |
Reviewer: | 18:40, 13 August 2008 (UTC) |
Yea, like Gerry, I think maybe you could get some ideas from reading the Wikipedia page on him. He did more than just invent gravity (um?) and his article should talk about the other stuff more. His jealously for example sticks out in my mind. Probably more reference of how everyone hates calculus and the pain he has caused in math classes would be good... MrN 18:45, Aug 13