Ok, so I've been tinkering with/adding to this page for quite a while, and I was kinda curious as to whether it actually turned out funny. Just a quick review should be sufficient this time around. - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon 
(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 02:08, Sep 7
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This article is under review by
<font-weight:bold>Gerry Cheevers.
Sayeth Gerry: shotgun!!
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| Humour:
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8.8
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*intro: 7
a good start. i'm intrigued, and want to keep reading, so a success. some issues, though. instead of 'bajillion' you could use a more realistic number. instead of the planet making things difficult, maybe it's fate or god. i'm not sure you need the 'whole' after the snort a brick line. it isn't clear what your tone is, but i'll come back to that after reading more.
good. i like this section. maybe a little more length.
i like the first few sentences. i don't have much to say about the sleek part, it's good as-is. same thing with the second section, i can't find a fault.
again, i feel bad because i really don't have anything to say. but then again i dont feel bad because this section is awesome.
pretty good wrap-up. i'd say the 'invincible act' thing is kind of weak. and parking on people was kind of confusing.
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| Concept:
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9
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5/5 points for a well-known subject worthy of a how to.
4/5 points for execution. your tone in the intro doesnt really match the rest of the article, with the hint of the author writing from jail and the random expletives. also the part where you're like 'you are awesome, my hero, etc.' doesn't eally fit. try to make these two sections match more with the tone of the rest of the article.
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| Prose and formatting:
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8
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fine, i'll give it a proofread. all your images are on the right, but it's a preference thing, so i'll just point it out.
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| Images:
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8
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good images, they contribute nicely. the first one's caption is a little weird.
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| Miscellaneous:
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8.5
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ave'd
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| Final Score:
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42.3
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my preview button tels me that your score is 42.3. i would support this aticle on VFH and will think about nomming it if you dont (maybe not for a while though, i have many noms now and i dont want to monopolize anything). anyway, great job, and good luck!
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| Reviewer:
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SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 22:50, 7 September 2008 (UTC)
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(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 02:08, Sep 7
