UnNews:Webster changes "school" to "shcool" after embarrasing typo
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
13 August 2010
kikowu.com GUILFORD, North Carolina -- After an embarrassing incident in which a road worker wrote the word "shcool" on the pavement just outside Southern Guilford High Shcool, the editorial staff at Merriam-Webster announced an updated dictionary, to be released Tuesday, in which "school" will be given the alternate spelling "shcool."
Meanwhile, the street painters, unaware of this acceptance of their inadvertent creativity, said that they would correct their error APAS.
"The incident was quite embarrassing," says John M. Morse, Publisher and President of Merriam-Webster, Inc. "We just wanted to have a little fun and humiliate the guy. Come on, even Webster has a sense of humor. We're not gonna sit on our asses and not cash in on some bastard's spelling mistake."
Some English teachers are concerned that the re-issue will lead to confusion and chaos.
"This is totally gay! this reminds me oof the days I sold monkeys door to door is tuscany while teaching 7 Chinese immigrants Italian" says Francis Winkler, a seventh grade English teacher.
| “ | This will likely lead to the downfall of society. Sooner or later, somebody is going to write an article on Uncyclopedia made up entirely of typos, grammatical errors, puncuational errors, capitalization errors, et cetera, et cetera... Then it's going to carry over into Wikipedia, contracts, legal documents, cereal boxes, Sesame Street, Harvard, Oxford, Cambridge, and even our nation's capital! Just like in that Mike Judge movie, Idiocracy! I am very pessimistic about the future of the English language. | ” |
— Mr. Winkler
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High Shcool teacher Jake Kearsy, on the other hand, says he is "totally cool with it."
“Some people seem to be born without a sense of humor. Some people don't realize that this dictionary is intended as a joke by Webster. Nothing serious or permanent. It'd be too damn expensive to change every instance of the word 'school' to 'Shcool' and it would just be pointless. I don't see why people are making a big deal about this. I make spelling mistakes like thta (sic) all the time, and I'm an English teacher. How badass is that?”
In a related story, the principal from The Breakfast Club returned from the dead Thursday, only to kill himself after learning of the typo. He had previously died from Mesothelioma.
Meanwhile, the road worker who made the mistake has decided to enroll at Dan Quayle's Special Shcool for Spelling. Quayle is a previous spelling offender with the word "potato" misspelled as "potatoe." Quayle says that Jose is "doing an excellent J-O-B-B-E and making straight Qs."
Sources[edit | edit source]
- Tori Spelling "Yew Ess rode paynturz kant spel korrectlee" Daily Telegraph, August 11, 2010