UnGames:Pick Up the Phone Booth and Aisle/future
Shazam!
You find yourself in a futuristic wonderland of advanced technology and fantastical innovation...
Well, not really- actually, everything looks pretty much the same as before, except the doors all open upwards and people are, for no good reason, wearing far more revealing clothing. Oh, and there's an anthropomorphic robot which appears to be made entirely out of large metal boxes walking around incredibly jerkily and with a constant whirring noise. Which is odd really, because even in the time you came from there were robots who could walk more realistically than that.
Sighing, you wonder why you came here in the first place, then notice the phonebooth in front of you. Like everything else, it is pretty much the same as before, except it now seems to be covered in tin foil. You turn to the man standing next to you; he is clearly an alien because he has a slightly different face to a normal human, although you can't help thinking what a coincidence it is that on a distant planet, in an entirely different environment, there has evolved to dominance and technological advancement a creature which is exactly the same shape and size as a human, just with a few ridges on its face.
Unfortunately, the alien can read minds, and is offended by your ceaseless analysis of continuity errors, and so kills you with a big, sharp, curvy weapon, which looks cool but is perplexingly over-elaborate, and would actually be completely useless against a simple sword. You are, of course, too dead to fully appreciate the silliness of this.
You feel so powerful after picking up that mysterious phone booth and the bottom of the aisle with it. The woman loves you now, your wallet is suddenly filled with cash, and your acne has cleared up forever!
That's right:
- *** You have won ***
Oh no! It turns out that was just some aliens playing a trick on you from their flying saucer!
Whilst your rosy sense of achievement has distracted you, they have taken the opportunity to quickly suck out your gastric juices with a telescopic bendy straw! In other words, you just lost The Game.
Late Thursday night. You've had a hard day and the last thing you need is this: shopping. Luckily, the place is pretty empty and you're progressing rapidly.
On to the next aisle.
The aisle stretches to the north, and back to the south. The shelves on either side of you block your view of the rest of the supermarket, with only the brightly colored aisle markers visible.
You have stopped your trolley next to the pasta section, bright plastic bags full of pale skin-tone shapes.
There is a brunette woman a few meters ahead, filling her trolley with sauces.
A shiny metal phone booth sits in the center of the aisle.
Your move:
- Pick up phone booth
- Pick up aisle
- Pick up phone booth and aisle
- In Soviet Russia, phone booth and aisle pick up you!!
- Use the phone booth
- Examine phone booth
- Examine aisle
- Examine me
- Examine woman
- talk to woman
- talk to me
- talk to phone booth
- sing
- inventory
- go to the magazine aisle
- look north
- look south
- look east
- look west
- look left
- look right
- look up
- look down
- look out
- look away
- go north
- go south
- go east
- go west
- go left
- go right
- go forward
- go backward
- jump
- jump back
- fly up
- tunnel down
- travel to past
- travel to present
- travel to future
- undo
- redo
- wait
- fall asleep
- wake up
- eat food
- eat the phone booth
- push booth
- fill booth
- draw booth
- dig around booth
- dig booth
- your mom
- pinch me
- cast Frotz
- cast Meteo
- cast Ultima
- cast Tom
- cast Magyck Myssile
- get the hell outta here
- enter shadow
- explode with the energy of a thousand suns
- win game
- let the dogs out
- get eaten by Domo-kun
- attempt to pronounce "xyzzy"
- say it again
- plugh
- go north, north, south, south, west, east, west, east, B, A, start
- remove cockroaches from mouth
- rm -rf *
- close this window
- vandalize the page
- Grawp vandalize
- recurse
- dial "666-666-6666" on the phone booth
- see my vest
- decline Latin verbs
- swear very loudly
- push buttons, push buttons like you just don't care
- Oscar Wilde on Pick Up the Phone Booth and Aisle
- become a professional screenwriter
- How do I stop the Grue from eating me?
- AAAAAAAAA!
- Leave aisle
- Buy pasta
- open PUTPBAA version 2.0
- do something
- play RuneScape
- breakdance
- look at pants
- look in pants
- Do absolutely nothing
- change clothes
- Ask the brunette out to a date in Atlantis.
- opt for the fetal position
- Huff kittens
- Pinch the brunette's buttocks
- pwn grue
- Flip the buggy over and crawl under it and ask the lady for a bottle of sauce so that you can survive for another day
- learn to speak every single language known to man (and several known to monkeys!)
- spontaneously combust
- Try to fight a Grue, and lose badly
- Leave this site and watch YouTube videos
- Play Zork, causing an epic win
- die
- come to a horrible existential realization
*Secret option!
Super-secret option!
Double super-secret option!