Talk:The Annual One-Day-Only Winter Holidays Earlybird 5:00 AM 99% Off Sale

Wow, you sure do write often Squiggles, how do you find the time? I've got ideas in my head that I oughta write down.

I like it so far, and am anticipating it's finish, I like the final copys best.--Witt, of UNion Entertain me* 06:55, 27 November 2006 (UTC)

Sorry I answered "dunno" in IRC, my dad was there and he disapproves of chatrooms. All I had time for was a short answer. My real answer was: Don't do your homework. Seriously. I do it all at school the next day during breaks and lunch. Just be prepared and bring whatever textbooks/etc. you need. That is the method to my madness. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 05:55, 30 November 2006 (UTC)

And for the record, I maintain A's and A+'s in all my classes, except for the B+ in math. So it's not like I'm failing school, either. Also, a disclaimer: The Above might not work for everyone. And don't cheat/copy answers from others. Just do it frantically. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 05:57, 30 November 2006 (UTC)

That's what I try doing, unfortunately I'm not very good at it. So I'm going to be around Uncyclopedia mostly weekends now, if possible.--Witt, of UNion Entertain me* 06:36, 30 November 2006 (UTC)

Not funny

Sorry, but I'll be the first to say it: I don't think this article is funny. It goes after all the obvious targets rather bluntly (using all the familiar attacks that we've all heard many times before) and lacks creativity. In short, it breaks the Don't State the Obvious rule.

Plus, what's with the outright racism in the opening paragraph? Now I'm not against some harmless stereotyping, but there are more creatives ways of doing it than having a quote from "Jewish people" about "sav[ing] their precious, precious money".

See also:

• Bias Is Not a Replacement for Humor
• Outright sarcasm is Not a Replacement for Humor

I'm not going to try to improve it (it would be an enormous job and I got flamed the last time I tried to rewrite something), but I think it has to be said. Take it as constructive criticism, please. The "survival" section is actually fairly good, but the rest of the article needs some rewriting. Esn 09:01, 15 December 2006 (UTC)

I'm actually glad you said this, but the humor here lies a little more "under the surface". It's a satire on The War on Christmas and some of the Christian Right's more blatant stereotyping and racism. What's funny about the Jew line in the beginning is not that it makes us go "Ha, ha, Jews," but that it makes us go "Ha, ha, Christian Right's deliberate stereotyping of Jews". I appreciate the constructive criticism, even though it already was featured. Obviously, you can make whatever changes you want, but I will sift through them to make sure they fit. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 23:29, 15 December 2006 (UTC)

From Pee Review

Out poops another one. So far, I think the better half of this article is the one on the War on Christmas, and the one that parodies the annual Christmas shopping frenzy is pretty weak. What say you, gentle populace? -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 07:03, 1 December 2006 (UTC)

1. Shouldn't the first pic say, "Holidays are here"?
2. "Ol' Farmer Ben's One Stop Food Shop" might work better as "Ol' Farmer Ben's Goode Time Foode Shoppe".
3. The Santa pic could mention that the bottle in the pic is filled with Jamaican Rum.
4. Don't forget the "George Washington Carver day sale" (a man with a peanut obsession is humour writ large, IMO)
5. Since it says "...a cheery, traditional wintertime wonder.." you might want to add an aside, or a footnote, that talks about how "tradition" means "doing the same thing year after year, whether you want to or not. Because it's tradition."
6. In "The Shift", maybe talk about how atheists continued to shop in their godless way.
7. In "The War on The War on Christmas", "Fox News continued their stupid war on a stupid, nonexistent war" could go "Fox News stupidly continued their stupid war on a stupid, nonexistent war", as comedy comes in threes (true story!)
8. Also in "The War on The War on Christmas", "They went almost 24 hours a day on the same subject, pausing only for commercials heralding Holiday sales, and even though..."
9. Also in "The War on The War on Christmas" ,"watching corny and just plain bad Holiday movies, including that abysmal Peanuts Christmas Special, and Egg Nog."
10. It needs pics of happy people shopping. Think a 50's era ad, in popping colours, with a happy WASP family (white pop w/pic, blonde mom, rascal, etc). lileks might have one somewhere, or a google search.
11. In "Day of the Sale", the goth kid should have an "invisible friend", rather than one of the visible variety.
12. In "The Sale" "Lather, rinse, and repeat until Christmas. Then take an hour off to ready yourself for Boxing Day. Heck, take two."

Just tweaks, mostly. I hope this helps.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 08:09, 2 December 2006 (UTC)

Wow, thanks. Here are my responses:

1. That was a real image, pulled from Wikipedia. That's the best part.
2. I changed the name, but kept the "One Stop" part.
3. LOL, I added this.
4. Done.
5. I was gonna put footnotes in in a while, and I'll definitely add that to the list.
6. Done.
7. Done.
8. Done.
9. Done.
10. Working on it.
11. Done.
12. Had to look up what Boxing Day is on Wikipedia, but Done.

Again, thanks! -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 20:49, 2 December 2006 (UTC)

Glad to help. If there's one thing I know, it's whatever it is that I'm talking about. Side note: when I was really small, I thought Boxing Day was so named because there was boxing on TV (and New Year's day because that was when the New Year's day parade was on). I ate a lot of paint as a child.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 22:45, 2 December 2006 (UTC)